Playing Frogs

[TheFifthElement]

She is playing frogs in the long grass,
rippling the reedy sea with a series of
jerky bobs

and dips.
I see her;
bubbling carefree,
blonde hair splashing a path
that catches sunlight like broken water.

If I followed it I would find her hunkered
against the ground, stained
every shade from green to brown,
all knees and jutting elbows,

and I’d watch her, as she watches creatures
weave amongst the grass,
greeting them broadly with a throaty croak:

‘Ribbit’ to bees in their striped pajamas,
‘Ribbit’ to beetles like pebbles dropped in water,
‘Ribbit’ to butterflies skimming the breeze.

Remembering how I saw her for the first time.

How nerves, like the ultrasound,
pressed into my belly.
How I stared into the murky screen,
sensing movement
swimming just below the surface.
The nurse pointing out details
vague as smoke,
an arm,
a questioning spinal curl,
crossed legs, splayed fingers,
a fast shuttered heartbeat,
two flooded lungs like wide eyes
staring back at me.

How for days afterwards I breathed more deeply.

Now she cocks a curious eye
towards the pond, still as stone.
A pond skater grapples the surface.

I watch, breathless, as she leaps.

[mir]

I love this poem.

It caught me from the line "catches the sun like broken water". The images are so evocative, and the part about the child as a baby growing inside her mother is amazing, perfectly balanced - "How for days afterwards I breathed more deeply"; and continued in the last line, which ends the poem with just the right feeling of breathless movement and anticipation.

Bravo!!

[ampoule]

This is just wonderful, Fifth, all the watching and looking deep within and into. The child with the buggy creatures, the mother with her unborn creature. It goes together so perfectly.

[symphony]

Yes, "Wonderful" does say it. I really liked the playful tone in this:

‘Ribbit’ to bees in their striped pajamas,
‘Ribbit’ to beetles like pebbles dropped in water,
‘Ribbit’ to butterflies skimming the breeze.
and the imagery and flow in this:

I see her;
bubbling carefree,
blonde hair splashing a path
that catches sunlight like broken water.

[PrinceMyshkin]

It was hard to keep this pinned to my monitor. It seemed ready to hop off of there and go scampering around my house. I hope you have a glimmer of a scintilla of an idea just how marvellous this is!

[blp]

Very good.

Did you intend a relationship between the breathing more deeply and the breathlessness? Kind of think that could be tightened up. Otherwise, lovely.

[firefangled]

Fifth, this is such a perfectly assembled series of images, they transcend the words and take on a life of their own. I forgot I was reading!

[kiz_paws]

I too was mesmerized by the images you so beautifully painted with your words. What a delightful poem this was to read. :thumbs_up
(and PrinceM's comment made me laugh out loud) :lol:

[Pendragon]

Oh, God the memories! Back up a forest trail miles from anywhere. My son about age four. Very swiftly flowing creek with large rocks. And I hear "Ribbet, Ribbet." I turn and can't even scream for the horror. He dives frog style head first off a big rock across a wide portion of stream towards another rock. My wife has almost fainted. But, old Jon lands fine on the other side, and scrambles around like a fat frog survying his domain. I went and got my "frog" and then thought, had we yelled, he'd have never made it... http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l108/AbsalomKane/Smilies/reddf.gif

[TheFifthElement]

Thanks everyone!

Pen - your story is exactly how I was thinking of this, and you're right you have to let them leap!

blp - thanks, it was my intent to link the 'breathed more deeply' and 'breathless' from the final line. Perhaps I need to shore that up a little. Thanks for the feedback.

Symphony - I'm glad you liked the Ribbit lines - they were the most fun to write. If I ever need to read this out it could be fun too!

[ampoule]

It also brought to mind Twain's, The Celebrated Jumping Frog of Calaveras County. My parents live very close to the town where that is still celebrated but I haven't been in years.

[PrinceMyshkin]

It also brought to mind Twain's, The Celebrated Jumping Frog of Calaveras County. My parents live very close to the town where that is still celebrated but I haven't been in years.

I guess after a certain age one isn't up to hopping or jumping long distances...

[ampoule]

LOL In this case, that would be about 2200 miles. :D

[PrinceMyshkin]

LOL In this case, that would be about 2200 miles. :D

In which case I'd suggest you take along some vittles. But what do froggies like to eat besides flies? Do they eat people's legs?

[barbara0207]

It was hard to keep this pinned to my monitor. It seemed ready to hop off of there and go scampering around my house. I hope you have a glimmer of a scintilla of an idea just how marvellous this is!

Couldn't have said it better. I loved the viewing of the unborn baby in the womb, the baby talk (is it for "rabbit"? I've never heard it before), the strong affection that was conveyed in every image throughout the poem, and the idea to let her "leap" when she needs to.

My own two daughters have "leapt" into lives of their own for some time now and they're doing fine. But I remember some of their "leaps" when they were young and how it wasn't always easy to let go. :)

[PrinceMyshkin]

is it for "rabbit"? I've never heard it before

No, "ribbit" is the English language phonetic attempt to reproduce the sound that frogs make.

[TheFifthElement]

Couldn't have said it better. I loved the viewing of the unborn baby in the womb, the baby talk (is it for "rabbit"? I've never heard it before), the strong affection that was conveyed in every image throughout the poem, and the idea to let her "leap" when she needs to.

My own two daughters have "leapt" into lives of their own for some time now and they're doing fine. But I remember some of their "leaps" when they were young and how it wasn't always easy to let go. :)

Thanks Barbara :)

and Prince is right, Ribbit is a way of expressing the croaking sound that frogs make - used especially by children but used by some adults too :blush:

[barbara0207]

Thanks for enlightening me, Jerry and Fifth. In German that would be "quak quak", with a long vowel as in father.

Seems I learn new words on LitNet every day. :)