On Not Understanding Poetry

[symphony]

The tree gazes in love at its beautiful shadow
Who is his own, yet whom he can never grasp.
- Rabindranath Tagore



I could never see Athos
As Dinocrates did. But then, dry
As it may sound, I could never even
See an apple and think of its celestial bound.
I go attacking poems with a bull tongue.
What? It took a chisel to write!


It took more than that,
I guess, to understand poetry or politics
(or even to fire a stick), but bless
This unforgiving earth that gives
Nothing but the brawny brownness
With haunting hints of gold!


Words, sounds, meanings--
All I pluck and nicely place in
The shelf, only to walk back a step
And wonder and adore and worship,
And worship and adore, then wonder--
Words. Sounds. Meanings?


The roots are out of reach,
But the leaves are compelling,
The flowers, ensorcelling-- which invite
--I reach, not receiving. I touch, never feel—
And hang somewhere where I can’t
Say the real from surreal.


Define dreams. Nay, that can
Never be done. Poetry, in dewy mornings
With tangerine suns and coffee steams,
Is best received in its mystery, one
Which will sail away with the whitest
Coffee fogs: fleeting dragon-tails


Driven away by your breath.
With dreamy eyes we see
The unseen, and cry it is so lovely,
When Eden could be just as green
As the front yard in block 42.
But Eden is heaven, and Poetry


Devine. And both are lost
In the subconscious. For it is never
In human nature to celebrate
The apparent, or to wallow in what
Remains: What remains is sensibility,
That which is lost is Beauty.



---

[ampoule]

My heavens, girl, this is beautiful. Oh that I could understand every poem. It's the mystery I love and desire.

[Pendragon]

"tangerine suns and coffee steams" You understand poetry well enough I think . Here I was thinking of "Puff the Magic Dragon" and danged if you don't end the stanza on "fleeting dragon-tails." http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l108/AbsalomKane/Smilies/Dragon.gif

[PrinceMyshkin]

No, you do not understand poetry (who does?). All you do is think it, and write it - MAGNIFICENTLY - and, I venture to say, live it. You are a luminous soul!

[kiz_paws]

Symphony, I would also like to say that you write beautiful beautiful poetry. This particular poem was a gem. Thanks :thumbs_up

[symphony]

Thanks Amp, Pen, Jer, and Kiz. :D

A friend told me I really know how to make my weaknesses sound like an art. :p One day i write an article on how pleasing it is to be the observer and never the painter, how not knowing the art makes u admire it more, and the other day i turn up with a thing like this. :lol: Bummer! Am I that much of an optimist? :D

[schadenfreude]

This is absolutely beautiful, symphony! These are my favourite lines:
"With dreamy eyes we see
The unseen, and cry it is so lovely,
When Eden could be just as green
As the front yard in block 42."
Because I cannot imagine heaven as anything other than all the best parts of this earth.
Thank-you!

[symphony]

Thanks schaden! I think i've read only one from u, which probably was ur first one here. And i remember how good that was and how awed i was to read it. Thanks again. :)

[Virgil]

Goodness gracious, where did you get the talent to write that. :) Outstanding Symph. The first two stanzas are perfection:

I could never see Athos
As Dinocrates did. But then, dry
As it may sound, I could never even
See an apple and think of its celestial bound.
I go attacking poems with a bull tongue.
What? It took a chisel to write!


It took more than that,
I guess, to understand poetry or politics
(or even to fire a stick), but bless
This unforgiving earth that gives
Nothing but the brawny brownness
With haunting hints of gold!
And it took a lot of daring to use words like Athos and Dinocrates. But it does flow well. This too is marvelous:

Define dreams. Nay, that can
Never be done. Poetry, in dewy mornings
With tangerine suns and coffee steams,
Is best received in its mystery, one
Which will sail away with the whitest
Coffee fogs: fleeting dragon-tails


Driven away by your breath.
With dreamy eyes we see
The unseen, and cry it is so lovely,
When Eden could be just as green
As the front yard in block 42.
But Eden is heaven, and Poetry


Devine. And both are lost
"Define dreams." Do you mean that as an imperative command or is it a question. You would need a question mark if you mean it as a question. Again uite daring either way. I love "the whitest/coffee fogs". Great.

I will say I don't care for the last stanza.

Devine. And both are lost
In the subconscious. For it is never
In human nature to celebrate
The apparent, or to wallow in what
Remains: What remains is sensibility,
That which is lost is Beauty.
It's so vague and to me intellectually wishy-washy. "Lost /in the subconscious." (1) somwhat awkward, (2) cliche. And I don't think the rest of that is much better. My recomendation is to tuck the word "devine in the previous stanza and end it there. "But Eden is heaven, and Poetry devine." that's a great ending. I love it Symph.

[symphony]

"Define dreams." Do you mean that as an imperative command or is it a question. You would need a question mark if you mean it as a question. Again uite daring either way. I love "the whitest/coffee fogs". Great.
1. I meant that as a command.
2. I could consider turning that into a question, but that would sound like someone's asking me to define it instead, and consequently the rest of the stanza might sound as an answer or explanation. Thats against my intention.


I will say I don't care for the last stanza.

It's so vague and to me intellectually wishy-washy. "Lost /in the subconscious." (1) somwhat awkward, (2) cliche. And I don't think the rest of that is much better. My recomendation is to tuck the word "devine in the previous stanza and end it there. "But Eden is heaven, and Poetry devine." that's a great ending. I love it Symph.

Perhaps changing the word "subconscious" will help? And thats all i can do since i want to keep the last stanza. I'm really obsessed with the last 2 lines, so i'm keeping it. :p


And... thanks Uncle Virge. :D

[Virgil]

Perhaps changing the word "subconscious" will help? And thats all i can do since i want to keep the last stanza. I'm really obsessed with the last 2 lines, so i'm keeping it. :p


And... thanks Uncle Virge. :D

Perhaps those last two lines aren't bad. Perhaps you can delete the whole "And both are lost/In the subconscious."

[symphony]

Hmmmm.... I'll have to pin another line up there then, though. I kind of want to keep the 6-line pattern of the stanzas too. I dont know if its the time (3 AM) but i cant seem to find a line that connects those 2 lines...

[firefangled]

I cannot add to what has been said so far, dear Symphony. I would only encourage you to keep writing and keep reading poetry. You have the heart of a poet. That cannot be learned and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

Nor is there singing school, but studying
Monuments of its own magnificence.


— Yeats, Sailing to Byzantium

[symphony]

Thanks so much fire!


But damn Uncle Virge, my brows are still forming a frown as i look at that 'subconscious'-line! :rolleyes:
:lol:

[Virgil]

Thanks so much fire!


But damn Uncle Virge, my brows are still forming a frown as i look at that 'subconscious'-line! :rolleyes:
:lol:
Frown at your line or my comment? Are you having second thoughts?

[jon1jt]

It's nicely written, symph, ambitious, lofty, but I'm not going to bull**** you, it drowns itself in the nonsensical mystery it strives to convey, and ultimately tries too hard to sound like a poem.


Define dreams. Nay,


With dreamy eyes we see
The unseen,


Say the real from surreal.

on and on.

[symphony]

Frown at your line or my comment? Are you having second thoughts?
My line.



....and ultimately tries too hard to sound like a poem.

Now now, I did have that feeling after writing it. Thanks for reading anyway.

[Trillian]

My god, what an elegant flow! Each word just slip-slides neatly into the next - it is like reading a satin ribbon. I see valid criticism in this thread, but, darn it, I like what I like. Did anyone try to read it aloud? It is lovely aloud. Reminds me a bit of Louise Gluck...

[jon1jt]

My god, what an elegant flow! Each word just slip-slides neatly into the next - it is like reading a satin ribbon. I see valid criticism in this thread, but, darn it, I like what I like. Did anyone try to read it aloud? It is lovely aloud. Reminds me a bit of Louise Gluck...

Louise Gluck??! Hmm...well, let me say this about Gluck---I read five poems from her The Paris Review published in its current issue and they all sucked. I'll read symphony's poem and flush The Paris Review down the toilet. Gluck writes one poem out of a hundred that's decent at best. The editors need to stop kissing up to her. Her work is pop garbage. The end.

[Trillian]

Ouch!!! I must admit, I haven't read anything recent by Gluck, but in her collection The Triumph of Achilles, the poems Mock Orange, and Hyacinth are quite lovely. Of course I like Rod McKuen too. Am I kicked out of the poetry appreciation club?:goof: :lol:

I stand by my "satin ribbon" comment.

[kiz_paws]

Ouch!!! I must admit, I haven't read anything recent by Gluck, but in her collection The Triumph of Achilles, the poems Mock Orange, and Hyacinth are quite lovely. Of course I like Rod McKuen too. Am I kicked out of the poetry appreciation club?Oh heck no, Trillian (welcome, btw) ... everyone is entitled to their opinion, and yours matters!

I stand by my "satin ribbon" comment.And so you should. That was a nice poetic statement in itself, I like! :)

[Trillian]

Thanks and thanks! I just love this place. How can you go wrong with an entire forum dedicated to the written word.

[symphony]

Hmm i havent read Gluck, so dont know whether to say "i'm THAT good??" or "i'm THAT bad??" . :)


(Thanks & welcome to LitNet, Trillian, i know u'll enjoy ur time here :) .)

[Trillian]

I must say that jon1jt does have a point about some of Gluck's poems, but when she is good, she is good, and I was thinking about the good ones when I posted! And thanks for the welcome!:wave: