Bipolar Disorder

[Anza]

My mom has bipolar, and I was wondering if anyone has it, too, or knows someone who has it. It's been exceedingly difficult to handl her, lately, and I was sort of seeking advice.

[blazeofglory]

My mom has bipolar, and I was wondering if anyone has it, too, or knows someone who has it. It's been exceedingly difficult to handl her, lately, and I was sort of seeking advice.

It is indeed a matter great sadness, dear Anza, that your mom is in that state. Today it is the circumstance we are in that creates such states. There is no oder and of course everyone is in a kind of rat race everyday. There are lots of challenges one is hard pressed to live with and rather than triumphing over this one falls victims to them.

I suggest to you take some courses to soothe her and do things that motivate her and show a smiling face. It makes a lot difference.

Indeed it is easy to advise but the situation you are hemmed in is hard to think.

[Idril]

My sister is bipolar and it certainly can be heartbreaking to watch them struggle. Is your mom currently taking medication and seeing a counsler? My sister does well as long as she's doing what she's supposed to be doing. It's when she decides she doesn't need this or that medication or she'd too busy to see her therapist that she starts having trouble. And even when things are on an even keel, it can take just one event or comment that can start them on a downward spiral. The thing is, with all mental illnesses, there is only so much loved ones can do, the ultimate responsibility for treatment lies with the person, they have to be commited to doing all that it takes to get better. My sister, when she's having struggles, is good about getting that extra help, realizing that she's getting in over her head and either admits herself to the hospital for a few days or steps up her therapy sessions. It's not that she doesn't have her down times, she wallows sometimes, lets things go on a little longer than perhaps she should but ultimately, she can recognize when she needs to get things under control and understands she can't do it herself and without that ability it would be much harder for all of us. And that manic stage is the toughest for the family I think because so often, they know they're in a manic stage but they like it, they don't want to stop it but when they crash and the fun is all over, it can be a nightmare.

[Bakiryu]

I'm bipolar. I was diagnosed about 2 years ago. ♥

[Anza]

Aww, Baki. What's it like? I want to know how she feels. Itt's so hard to keep up.

And yes, she takes medicine and sees a therapist, but she still gets manic and still gets depressed, and I'm the only one in the family who can manage to keep pace. (See latest blog, it's about her)

[Shalot]

I've got a family member who was diagnosed with it. But, I am not real sure about what bipolar disorder is really because I was a kid who grew up with a parent who supposedly had it. I remember there was alcohol a lot, and job loss and drug use, and then the intervention but I just remember a lot of screaming and not having enough money and the year we got the needy basket. :argue: :( :mad:

[Anza]

A bipolar person has severe mood swings from depressed to hyper-spazzy. When she's hyper-spazzy she can never finish a task, and she talks and thinks at a mile per second. You can never get a word in edgewise. She is incredibly willing to take risks. You can't keep pace with her.
Then, when she's depressed, she won't get out of bed, or her PJs or the house.

[Shalot]

A bipolar person has severe mood swings from depressed to hyper-spazzy. When she's hyper-spazzy she can never finish a task, and she talks and thinks at a mile per second. You can never get a word in edgewise. She is incredibly willing to take risks. You can't keep pace with her.
Then, when she's depressed, she won't get out of bed, or her PJs or the house.

yeah, I guess that sounds about right. mine would talk a big game and then those ideas would never come to fruition...mainly i just remember the drunken episodes. that was the worst part of my situation. I guess the shrink knew what she was doing when she diagnosed it. I think growing up I was just too pissed off about how I suffered that I didn't want to understand the illness. Im still skeptical so I'll tell you that's the diagnosis, but sometimes I just don't believe it.

[Anza]

"mine would talk a big game and then those ideas would never come to fruition..."

That's Mommy!

[Bakiryu]

Aww, Baki. What's it like? I want to know how she feels. Itt's so hard to keep up.

And yes, she takes medicine and sees a therapist, but she still gets manic and still gets depressed, and I'm the only one in the family who can manage to keep pace. (See latest blog, it's about her)



A bipolar person has severe mood swings from depressed to hyper-spazzy. When she's hyper-spazzy she can never finish a task, and she talks and thinks at a mile per second. You can never get a word in edgewise. She is incredibly willing to take risks. You can't keep pace with her.
Then, when she's depressed, she won't get out of bed, or her PJs or the house.

You just described my whole personality, since I was a kid. I can speak faster than a speeding bullet, and I get extremely happy sometimes, others I just cry over how Dori insulted my signature, or how my nail broke, or geico commercials, ect.

[Anza]

But how do you feel???
Do you realize how you act?
My mom does, and it breaks her heart. That is, to know how she treats others when she's like that, but to have no control. Sometimes I just wish she were oblivious to it all. It breaks my heart to know how she suffers, and hos miserable she is in that knowledge.

[Bakiryu]

But how do you feel???
Do you realize how you act?
My mom does, and it breaks her heart. That is, to know how she treats others when she's like that, but to have no control. Sometimes I just wish she were oblivious to it all. It breaks my heart to know how she suffers, and hos miserable she is in that knowledge.

yes, I do. I have always been like that and my mum just assumes is my personality. I can be a huge biatch to people and I can't just stop it, it hurts sometimes, It's like being switched channels all the time, but you're the TV and someone else has the remote :sick: '

I can understand how you both and all feel :(

[Anza]

does it have any physical side effects?
When you're manic do you feel exhausted, but your body just keeps going?

[Shea]

My dad is bipolar. He was diagnosed when I was 16. It explain a lot of his behavior when I was growing up. I think he's a little different about it though and I think that that stems from how he was raised. When he is manic, he is "literally the smartest man in the world". In his mind, no one else can compare to his knowlege. He doesn't get that way very often anymore because they've finally found the right combination of medication for him. But even when he's okay, his ideas and opinions are still the only ones to follow.

I really don't think that he cares that he behaves that way, but I'm sure that has quite a lot to do with the way my grandparents raised him. As long as your blood family, you can do no wrong. But if you're married into the family, and you do something wrong, they're highly critical. My poor dad had a double whammy on that one.

[Koa]

I don't know anything about these conditions but lately I've been thinking that if I were in the US I would have been diagnosed with something by now. No kidding, I have a feeling that this kind of conditions are much more considered in the US than in Europe, especially Southern Europe, where you're generally not taken seriously until you get really really bad. All I always get is "everybody feels down, stop being a drama queen". Which is true sometimes but sometimes I fear there's something more to it.

So maybe I am just a drama queen but while we're at it I thought I'd ask... in the past two weeks I've been going from incredibly depressed to feeling just fantastic, without any steps inbetween. Since Thursday I've been feeling completely plain again, not too bad but not too good, but I had two horrible days when I was really down, didn't eat, threw my mobile phone to a mirror (none of which broke, thankfully cos I have no money), spent several hours listening to The Cure occasionally staring at my beautiful desktop picture and the clouds on it. I'm not sure this is too normal. The days before that I've been feeling fantastic instead, mainly because of two people I've been hanging around with, and every time my mood improves it has to do with them, especially one of them. And this sudden change was quite... I don't know, weird. It was prompted by something, but I started feeling bad even before that something.
All this made me think of this bipolar thing but I don't really know...

During another depressed time a couple of weeks ago, I had big arguments with two online friends, one of which hasn't talked to me since :rolleyes: and we were extremely close (it's not the first time this happens though :rolleyes:)

[Idril]

does it have any physical side effects?
When you're manic do you feel exhausted, but your body just keeps going?

From what my sister has told me, when you're manic, you feel great, on top of the world. She said when it starts, she loves it because she gets so much done, she has so much energy and doesn't have to sleep. There was one period where she literally didn't sleep for 2 weeks. She ended up in the psych ward after that, sedated and sleeping for a couple of days. Manic phases are always what gets her into the hospital...always. I think your body wears out but your mind doesn't so the body just gets pushed to the edge and then things just go downhill from there. And it's not just the physical aspect to manic phases that are so dangerous. The risks that you were talking about Anza are the most serious because the consequences of those risks have lasting effects.

[Tersely]

My mom has it too...probably before they had a name for it. I just deal. It used to get to me but because I'm more informed, I love my mom for being her. Those moods are just my mom. Gotta take it in stride and try not to take it personally. :thumbs_up

[Anza]

The only way she ever comes down from a manic is a HUGE catastrophe, then she goes into deep depression. She's gone months on manic episodes, and then something really bad will happen and its like she's been shot out of the sky.

[barbara0207]

in the past two weeks I've been going from incredibly depressed to feeling just fantastic, without any steps inbetween. Since Thursday I've been feeling completely plain again, not too bad but not too good, but I had two horrible days when I was really down, didn't eat, threw my mobile phone to a mirror (none of which broke, thankfully cos I have no money), spent several hours listening to The Cure occasionally staring at my beautiful desktop picture and the clouds on it. I'm not sure this is too normal. The days before that I've been feeling fantastic instead, mainly because of two people I've been hanging around with, and every time my mood improves it has to do with them, especially one of them. And this sudden change was quite... I don't know, weird. It was prompted by something, but I started feeling bad even before that something.
All this made me think of this bipolar thing but I don't really know...


As long as you have the faintest reason to be in a particular mood (such as friends being there or not) you seem to be OK. Bipolar disorder makes you lose control of yourself and you can get into these moods for no reason at all. E.g. you might sit at your desk and cry but you have no idea why. Your behaviour may be normal, maybe you just overreact a bit. But if you see any signs of the things mentioned above, you should see a counsellor. All the best to you, Koa.

[Niamh]

My mom has it too...probably before they had a name for it. I just deal. It used to get to me but because I'm more informed, I love my mom for being her. Those moods are just my mom. Gotta take it in stride and try not to take it personally. :thumbs_up

Before it was called Bipolar it was called Manic Depression...

[Anza]

Yeah. My mom never says she's bipolar, she's manic-depressive. SHe was diagnosed in her twenties

[Bakiryu]

Yeah, there's even a song about it: http://youtube.com/watch?v=mv2W-8BRBjQ

I think I like being bipolar though, it makes me artistic, creative, able to finish stuff (mostly by sleeplessness) and philosophical. That's why i don't take any of my prescribed meds.

[Lote-Tree]

Yeah. My mom never says she's bipolar, she's manic-depressive. SHe was diagnosed in her twenties

Is your mom creative in any way?

[Anza]

she's really good at embroidery.
When she gets depressed, she sits around doing puzzles.
She's an EXCEPTIONAL cook.

[Janine]

A bipolar person has severe mood swings from depressed to hyper-spazzy. When she's hyper-spazzy she can never finish a task, and she talks and thinks at a mile per second. You can never get a word in edgewise. She is incredibly willing to take risks. You can't keep pace with her.
Then, when she's depressed, she won't get out of bed, or her PJs or the house.

I know a lot about bipolar; I have been dealing with this disease lately with professional advisors and family support specialists, social workers. You see, my younger sister had had a total relapse at Christmas, and she became very manic. The 'hyper-spazzy' state is exactly how she has been ever since. She normally never seems to hit the lower point of depression. The manic phase is harder to deal with, so I fully understand and sympathise with you Anza. In that state it is like they are a drug, like speed, and they don't think anything is wrong with them. My sister is now on her 4th hospitalization and she was recently put on an antipyschotic drug; so far there, is no great improvement, but we do have hope. Other than that, they do need meds to stabilze their condition. My sister is basically on Lithium and the drug I mentioned.

Anza, don't try to go at it alone; seek as much help as you can from agencies and other support systems. Many are free to families of diagnosed mentally ill realitives. I found much help when I went and sought it out. NAMI is the National Alliance for the Mentally Ill, and is also a good way to educate yourself. But local agencies can really help and lend support, too. One needs support dealing with this on a daily basis.

Is your mother getting good medical care? I hope she is on medications to stabilize her condition. I know it is hard to get the help mentally ill people need and there are still so many stigmas people attach to the illness; that part is unfair and sad.

If there is anything more I can do to help, feel free to email me.

[Pensive]

others I just cry over how Dori insulted my signature,
Hmmmm I think I can get disheartened over my signature being insulted too.

Okay guys, after reading this whole thread, I felt I could relate to this bit over here specifically. 'The can't sleep' bit during excitement. Whenever I am excited or whenever I am depressed or whenever I am a little bit sick or out of station, I have trouble getting even a little sleep. I remember having remained woken up for two or three days in a row in some foreign city (probably getting an hour or so of sleep on the third day maybe). Don't remember exactly. It isn't very difficult for me to remain woken up for long I have noticed, for longer than most people I have encountered. Only it seems that there is some part of my brain that has got damaged, all else feels right. Apparently people can't even see that damaged bit and I appear mostly normal.

Though it might as well be because my life is generally very simple, not many moments of extreme excitement (though upto a certain extent I am excited about every tomorrow :D) are there. Neither long spells of depression. Yet. :)

Since I know very little of psychology, I would be interested to hear if all that I have said makes me a part of some 'manic depression' or 'bipolar disorder' or 'super mania' or anything?

[Shea]

I'm not sure if I understood you fully, but if you say that you "appear mostly normal", you probably aren't manic/depressive. You're friends wouldn't think you seem normal if you were manic.

When William was born, it set my Dad into a manic state. That was hard to deal with. I was "supposed" to have as natural a delivery as possible at the hospital, but because the baby was facing the wrong direction, I needed an epidural because it caused terrible back pain. Then, the baby's heart rate kept coming down whenever I pushed so they had to rush me to the OR for a c-section. My dad was one of my family members in the room during the labor. He already thinks that all doctors are quacks, so when they took away his firstborn to cut her open, I guess that was too much for him. For weeks, we had to deal with him wanting to sue and starting arguments with my sister about how it's safer to have babies at home among other wild notions.

He's back to normal now, fortunately. The only trouble is, my husband is so afraid to be around him for long periods of time now. My parents are coming down next week, and I've told them to stay for as long they liked, but Leo says two weeks tops. It's hard to convince him now that my dad's ok.

[Pendragon]

Normal feelings are not always there
For those of us with Bipolar Disorder
Sometimes there is panic and sometimes fear
And tears are often in order
Sometimes life can be hell, and problems arise
And our medicines don’t always cut it
People can see that look in your eyes
And often as not take open doors and shut it
But understanding is something I do not look for
Unless the other person has been through it
I am waiting out here by that fast closed door
For the invitation to come in if you’ll do it
To all of my friends who go through this with me:
Shadows will pass and sometimes the day is sunny…

Pendragon

Have a nice day, now! :)

[Pensive]

I'm not sure if I understood you fully, but if you say that you "appear mostly normal", you probably aren't manic/depressive. You're friends wouldn't think you seem normal if you were manic.

Well, my friends say the only places where they find me abnormal are:
my philosophical attitude (maybe I think too much, and get a way too meaningful sometimes :p)
ignoring the fashion
not engaging much in gossip
not wearing make-up :D

If that makes me a maniac I don't care. :p
But my sleeping irregularities annoy me a bit. If those make me a maniac, I do care. :p


When William was born, it set my Dad into a manic state. That was hard to deal with. I was "supposed" to have as natural a delivery as possible at the hospital, but because the baby was facing the wrong direction, I needed an epidural because it caused terrible back pain. Then, the baby's heart rate kept coming down whenever I pushed so they had to rush me to the OR for a c-section. My dad was one of my family members in the room during the labor. He already thinks that all doctors are quacks, so when they took away his firstborn to cut her open, I guess that was too much for him. For weeks, we had to deal with him wanting to sue and starting arguments with my sister about how it's safer to have babies at home among other wild notions.

He's back to normal now, fortunately. The only trouble is, my husband is so afraid to be around him for long periods of time now. My parents are coming down next week, and I've told them to stay for as long they liked, but Leo says two weeks tops. It's hard to convince him now that my dad's ok.

Ouch.
That sounds bad, Shea. :( I hope the condition of your father improves.

[Janine]

I'm not sure if I understood you fully, but if you say that you "appear mostly normal", you probably aren't manic/depressive. You're friends wouldn't think you seem normal if you were manic.

When William was born, it set my Dad into a manic state. That was hard to deal with. I was "supposed" to have as natural a delivery as possible at the hospital, but because the baby was facing the wrong direction, I needed an epidural because it caused terrible back pain. Then, the baby's heart rate kept coming down whenever I pushed so they had to rush me to the OR for a c-section. My dad was one of my family members in the room during the labor. He already thinks that all doctors are quacks, so when they took away his firstborn to cut her open, I guess that was too much for him. For weeks, we had to deal with him wanting to sue and starting arguments with my sister about how it's safer to have babies at home among other wild notions.

Shea, I feel badly for you. This can't be easy to deal with. C-sections are sometimes necessary though. My daughter-in-law just had one. She went all through labor and then, near the very end, it was the only alternative for a safe birth, for both mother and child. My mother, years ago, had a baby born that was breached and it was a horrific experience. The baby died during the birth; heart-breaking. This was her first child and to this day (she is 87), it still affects her. I think you are entirely lucky you have your child safely delivered and with you and your husband. Enjoy and cherish little William. Count his birth a blessing. I also know a young woman who died giving birth; it is such a scary thing indeed and risky at times. I am very sorry for your father and hope that he will be ok now. I don't know if he has been diagnosed with bipolar; but if not, he does need to be evaluated to see if he has the disorder, or some other disorder and be given the proper treatment and medication to relieve his symptoms or stabilize his condition. Perhaps he just had a major anxiety attack, when you were delivering. My son has a baby girl and he is so protective of her; I can see him being like this when she becomes a woman and gives birth herself. It is not an easy thing for a father to deal with. You are still his little girl in many ways.


He's back to normal now, fortunately. The only trouble is, my husband is so afraid to be around him for long periods of time now. My parents are coming down next week, and I've told them to stay for as long they liked, but Leo says two weeks tops. It's hard to convince him now that my dad's ok.

This is good to hear but you must try to mend the family in some way so that he can see his grand-child. I think a two week stay is more than adequate; it is truly generous. One has to compromise sometimes.

[Shea]

Pensive, perhaps you should try a sleep study. They could tell you if you have some kind of an apnea.

Janine, Thank you for your kind words. I'm glad your daughter-in-law had a successful delivery. As long as they both are safe, that's what matters. (It was just difficult to convince my dad of that) I can understand how your mother feels, though I've never lost a child (and hopefully I won't have to go through it!). It tears me up whenever I think about abortion, and even more so now that my son is here. My dad has been diagnosed as manic/depressive and is on treatment. Stressfull situations like that though are too much for him.

[Janine]

Pensive, perhaps you should try a sleep study. They could tell you if you have some kind of an apnea.

Janine, Thank you for your kind words. I'm glad your daughter-in-law had a successful delivery. As long as they both are safe, that's what matters. (It was just difficult to convince my dad of that) I can understand how your mother feels, though I've never lost a child (and hopefully I won't have to go through it!). It tears me up whenever I think about abortion, and even more so now that my son is here. My dad has been diagnosed as manic/depressive and is on treatment. Stressfull situations like that though are too much for him.

Shea, yes, it is a very tragic thing to lose a child. My grand-daughter and your son are certainly blessings to us. I can't imagine the other scenerio or the loss of a mother. The mother I knew of was young (mid 20's) and her husband now has two children to raise alone. It was a sad and shocking day for that family; but now the husband seems to be doing ok with the help from his wonderful family. But still that loss has to go deeply.

Glad that your father was diagnosed and put on medications. My sister has bipolar, so I fully understand. In fact, she is on her 4th hospitalization in the past two months. Lets hope this one works out for her. She went off her medications, which caused total havock to her life, extending to those around her. Not an easy thing to deal with. It has been a hard struggle for my family and it is far from over yet; but I always hope for the best; my optimistic nature.:)

Pensive, I agree with Shea, you may need a sleep study; but actually there are many things that can cause restlessness and lack of sleep, especially in young people. I think it could be any number of things that is keeping you up. I know you too well to talk to that you are not bipolar - you seem far from it to me. Mostly bipolar is an extreme condition and alters far from normal ranges. I know since I have lived with a person with it for over 15yrs. You can read more about the condition online. Wikipedia actually has some good entries about it.

[1n50mn14]

Bi-polar disorder varies greatly from person to person, with the basis of it being abrupt and frequent changes from super-duper happy (manic) to incredibly depressed (depressive.) Severity of mood-swings varies between each case, as does the frequency. I was diagnosed bi-polar when I was fifteen, I believe, and as it carries on, I'm less and less sure that it was a teen hormone thing.

Several of my family members also suffer (err..) from the disorder. In my personal view, there is nothing you can really do but be there at their back for them. It is very difficult to handle, particularily because many people feel incriminated and become grouchy when you point out their mood swings, and often take your help as being patronizing and condescending. Many people are unwilling to face up to the severity of their own disorders.

My only advice for you is to understand that it isn't her fault she is the way she is, try to back her when you can and encourage her to see her therapist and continue/start medication.