Zeitgeist

[Pendragon]

Zeitgeist

What will it be about this past year that will set it apart from all the rest?
In the endless flow of time that passes regularly through its glass?
It was not the Year of Coldest Winter, no, nor I think the Year of Summer Best!
Not the Year of the Great Flood, thank God, I remember that one come to pass!
It was not The Year I Broke My Leg or The Year I Broke My Ribs,
It was not The Year I Slipped a Disc, or The Year I Busted My Right Hand.
It was not the Year Things Grabbed Hold in My Head, Yanked, and Hollered “Dibs.”
It was not the Year They Told Me I ‘d Be Disabled and I had to start again.
It was not the Year of Blank Disappointment, in hospitals and out again.
It was not the Year of Cold Black Rage; I am never going to accept this hand! Redeal!
It was not the Year of I’ll Show Them! College, suma cum laude for my pains.
It was not the Year of Heartbreak…you still can’t make it out there…accept that. Dale.
But it was the Year of Graduation for my oldest son Jonathan, now in College himself:
And his dad is very proud to help him and quit feeling sorry for himself…

Pendragon
© 1/2/03

[Sweets America]

Oh this is a sweet poem Pen! :) I was wondering what the ending would be, and it was a nice one. I have suggested some minor 'corrections' in red, but I'm really not sure about them. :blush:


Zeitgeist

What will it be about this past year that will set it apart from all the rest?
In the endless flow of time that that(shouldn't the second 'that' be removed?) passes regularly trough it’s (its?) glass?
It was not the Year of Coldest Winter, no, nor I think the Year of Summer Best!
Not the Year of the Great Flood, thank God, I remember that one come to pass!
It was not The Year I Broke My Leg or The Year I Broke My Ribs,
It was not The Year I Slipped a Disc, or The Year I Busted My Right Hand.
It was not the Years(remove the s?)Things Grabbed Hold in My Head, Yanked, and Hollered “Dibs.”
It was not the Year They Told Me I ‘d Be Disabled and I had to start again.
It was not the Year of Blank Disappointment, in hospitals and out again.
It was not the Year of Cold Black Rage; I am never going to accept this hand! Redeal!
It was not the Year of I’ll Show Them! College, suma cum laude for my pains.
It was not the Year of Heartbreak…you still can’t make it out there…accept that. Dale.
But it was the Year of Graduation for my oldest son Jonathan, now in Collage(College) himself:
And his dad is very proud to help him and quit feeling sorry for himself…

Pendragon
© 1/2/03

[Virgil]

An additional typo Pen: I think it's "through" in the second line. A great idea for a poem. And quite touching. Please quit feeling sorry for yourself. You are blessed with friends and love.

[Sweets America]

An additional typo Pen: I think it's "through" in the second line. A great idea for a poem. And quite touching. Please quit feeling sorry for yourself. You are blessed with friends and love.

Ah, you're right about the typo.

What you say about quitting feeling sorry for oneself. Of course that is healthier to do so, but, sometimes it's difficult. When one feels sad, one might somehow need to dwell on sadness, as if to explore each sad area of their being and mend those areas one after another, so that the inner wounds are healed for some time until they bleed again. Sometimes, sadness just needs to be heard, I think.

[PrinceMyshkin]

Strong stuff! But notwithstanding the directness of all the preceding, I'd sooner do without that overly-explicit last line. The one before it, celebrating Jonathan's graduation, would clearly enough imply your pride in him.

[Pendragon]

A BIG THANK YOU to all of my editors, I would be the world's greatest if I could get my fingers to hit the correct keys and read my stuff like an editor instead of how I wanted it written! :lol: :lol: :lol: