My first poem: Why I love your eyes

[Nelson]

I Sank in your eyes once, long time ago...
Under the heat of the sun, near waves of the sea
An ethernal moment... I still remember
And I did it again this last time
In a cofee shop, in a restaurant, in bed drinking wine...
And I noticed something, something I had forgot
But it was there, in your ambar eyes
The black sparkle, so familiar... so beloved!
And there I was again... lying in the sand...
Nothing changed... Wanted to be yours again!
Only yours, like that day in the beach
Sank in your beautilful eyes.

[quasimodo1]

To Nelson: Good and very sincere poem. You have it bad. Try and hang on to the girl with the eyes. quasi

[kiz_paws]

That was very pretty, Nelson. Oh to be loved that badly! ;)

Hey, and welcome to LitNet, by the way! :thumbs_up

[Eternalaegis]

nelson, well done! i like the imageries =)

[LadyW]

Goodness, its so lovely...
I adore the phrase "sank into your eyes"; clever how you've used it whilst talking about the beach too.
Very heartfelt. I do wonder, was it inspired by a personal situation?

[PrinceMyshkin]

Great, strong stuff! I especially liked

1) the seemingly effortless flow of it, the absence of any Hey! Will you look at that - I'm writing a poem! and
2) the way the eyes - just generic "eye" to begin with - acquire the specifics of "amber...black sparkle" as you sink into them in memory. You might even have indulged in one more of those details (but more than one more might be milking it).

[Pendragon]

Pal, if you haven't sent your dear girl this poem, do so at once! It's beautiful!

Pen

[Nelson]

Thanks for your sincere responses!. I am Glad You liked it!, and yes...Its very personal!.

[ampoule]

Interesting word, ethernal. Is that a combination of eternal and ethereal? It certainly befits your beautiful poem.

[amanda_isabel]

Interesting word, ethernal. Is that a combination of eternal and ethereal? It certainly befits your beautiful poem.

i agree. perfect thing for me to read before i hit the hay, especially after Sangre. :)

your inspiration for this poem is blessed.