AimusSage
12-17-2007, 04:53 PM
It feels awkward as it is, but I can't put my finger on it, because I burned it while staring too vehemently into the mumble jumble of words. :(
PORTRAIT OF A STAR
http://i54.photobucket.com/albums/g104/Aimussage/portrait-of-a-star.jpg
This is a portrait of Bob the universe. Now mind you, it is only one portrait, and the only way to fully capture Bob the universe is to make an infinite number of portraits. This portrait is special in that it shows the point of origin. It is the one point in the universe where Bob does not exist. He has retreated from himself that part of the universe. He himself has said that it is too small for him to notice, but strange warps of time and space around this Bob-less area suggests that he is quite aware. Only the most brave venture there, and when they return, they all call themselves Bob, But no Bob ever goes into the point of origin, the place therefore, is quite Bob-less.(3)
There is a danger lurking though, and this place of peculiar tastes and splendid unknowns is threatened by something so auspicious, that it is Something or someone we will not encounter until later in the story!
http://i54.photobucket.com/albums/g104/Aimussage/portraitofastar.jpg
This is a glimpse into the future. Or what could be one of a million possible futures. (4) A hero has risen, and together with his loyal sidekick, their mysterious and incredibly dense bird friend and the guidance of a true Sage, they will attempt to prevent the future, and set a new course for the universe. (5) Inside the room 31! Where it really is quite safe despite rumours to the contrary. (6)
The author would like to apologize for the frequent use of footnotes. It is something an addiction, and he has already applied for a placement in a special clinic where he can receive optimal treatment at the hands of the best psychoanalysts from the Freudian Cluster. (7)
(3) It is rumoured that it is a doorway to another universe, but this rumour was started by the famous writer of fiction Sir Bob the mumbled. It is well known that he made his own audio books. This caused many a listener to misunderstand his stories. The idea that it is a doorway to another universe is just a big misunderstanding and cannot possibly be true.
(4) Obviously, there are more than a million possible futures, as Bob from O’shady’s points out: “It’s just that this bloody author is quite fond of the word million, and fits in into the most inappropriate parts of reality.”
(5) This is all subject to a pending enquiry by the Interspatial Planetary Rift Foundation, who have reason to believe the hero in question might be interested in obtaining a discount card. This would prevent him from hearing the full extent of what awaits, causing him to be quite unprepared for the journey ahead.
--- The Interspatial Planetary Rift Foundation is an investigative body from the legislative division of the pre-determined boring species governmental coffee delivery board. Their headquarters is in the Albernotquitecurque galaxy. This foundation has in recent millennia become the premier investigative and Enquiry Company. The success has often been attributed to their rigorous methods, but as Bob from O’shady’s will tell you: “They just don’t need you to fill in every form in triplicate and make copies for every separate division.”
(6) Please visit the Museum of extraordinary science on Mars. The permanent exhibit Stranger than fiction in a wormhole that deteriorates and collapses has a pillar dedicated entirely to the not quite so mysterious Room 31.
(7) Bob from O’Shady’s would like to mention that by not turning the apology into a footnote means there is still hope. This footnote to explain this obviously means there is no hope left whatsoever.
PORTRAIT OF A STAR
http://i54.photobucket.com/albums/g104/Aimussage/portrait-of-a-star.jpg
This is a portrait of Bob the universe. Now mind you, it is only one portrait, and the only way to fully capture Bob the universe is to make an infinite number of portraits. This portrait is special in that it shows the point of origin. It is the one point in the universe where Bob does not exist. He has retreated from himself that part of the universe. He himself has said that it is too small for him to notice, but strange warps of time and space around this Bob-less area suggests that he is quite aware. Only the most brave venture there, and when they return, they all call themselves Bob, But no Bob ever goes into the point of origin, the place therefore, is quite Bob-less.(3)
There is a danger lurking though, and this place of peculiar tastes and splendid unknowns is threatened by something so auspicious, that it is Something or someone we will not encounter until later in the story!
http://i54.photobucket.com/albums/g104/Aimussage/portraitofastar.jpg
This is a glimpse into the future. Or what could be one of a million possible futures. (4) A hero has risen, and together with his loyal sidekick, their mysterious and incredibly dense bird friend and the guidance of a true Sage, they will attempt to prevent the future, and set a new course for the universe. (5) Inside the room 31! Where it really is quite safe despite rumours to the contrary. (6)
The author would like to apologize for the frequent use of footnotes. It is something an addiction, and he has already applied for a placement in a special clinic where he can receive optimal treatment at the hands of the best psychoanalysts from the Freudian Cluster. (7)
(3) It is rumoured that it is a doorway to another universe, but this rumour was started by the famous writer of fiction Sir Bob the mumbled. It is well known that he made his own audio books. This caused many a listener to misunderstand his stories. The idea that it is a doorway to another universe is just a big misunderstanding and cannot possibly be true.
(4) Obviously, there are more than a million possible futures, as Bob from O’shady’s points out: “It’s just that this bloody author is quite fond of the word million, and fits in into the most inappropriate parts of reality.”
(5) This is all subject to a pending enquiry by the Interspatial Planetary Rift Foundation, who have reason to believe the hero in question might be interested in obtaining a discount card. This would prevent him from hearing the full extent of what awaits, causing him to be quite unprepared for the journey ahead.
--- The Interspatial Planetary Rift Foundation is an investigative body from the legislative division of the pre-determined boring species governmental coffee delivery board. Their headquarters is in the Albernotquitecurque galaxy. This foundation has in recent millennia become the premier investigative and Enquiry Company. The success has often been attributed to their rigorous methods, but as Bob from O’shady’s will tell you: “They just don’t need you to fill in every form in triplicate and make copies for every separate division.”
(6) Please visit the Museum of extraordinary science on Mars. The permanent exhibit Stranger than fiction in a wormhole that deteriorates and collapses has a pillar dedicated entirely to the not quite so mysterious Room 31.
(7) Bob from O’Shady’s would like to mention that by not turning the apology into a footnote means there is still hope. This footnote to explain this obviously means there is no hope left whatsoever.