Unfinished

[jon1jt]

Unfinished. So are you.

[B-Mental]

Uh-Oh, someones been watching too many X files...:lol: I like this one a lot jon. I don't have a clue where you pull it all from. This one has some romantic interests caught up in awe.

[kiz_paws]

Your poem has a lulling quality much like a quiet song of a North American Indian. The final verse was my favorite, Jon. There was a heartbeat to this one. :thumbs_up

[TheFifthElement]

Hardly unfinished at all though there is more, I think, not said than said. Love the ending from this line onwards:


She was a professor of science, and there were theories.

I have to disagree with this though :


A laugh relayed in that delicate way a mother
who has just heard a child mess up the words to a song

most mothers I know (including myself) laugh uproariously when their kids mess up. It's the only respite we get, you know ;)

I love the way that your poems have an almost conversational tone, though it is no conversation I know or have experienced. It'd be nice though, then, perhaps, people would be saying things worth saying.

[Sweets America]

I love it. I am not sure you want me to comment but I just love this poem. Sometimes I don't like the conversational tone that FifthElement refers to, but here it appealed to me. I love the way you began the poem, (the first three words) and the first stanza in general. There are just so many things in this first stanza.
The rest of the poem is also wonderful, especially the last stanza.
I just love the freedom in this poem. It moved me very much. It is one of the best poems I've read in here.

[amanda_isabel]

wonderful.. the longer verses are aesthetically playful.

[jon1jt]

B, Kiz...I think after my blabbering the other night I 'gave away' the poem to you guys!

Amanda: I'm happy you're digging. What is poetry without playfulness? Answer. Homer.


Hardly unfinished at all though there is more, I think, not said than said.

Oh definitely. The last lines emulate just that.


most mothers I know (including myself) laugh uproariously when their kids mess up. It's the only respite we get, you know ;)

I witnessed a giggly mother and her daughter singing recently. Funny how poetry is all around us. I suppose there's a lot to mothering that does not involve giggling, yes. :)


I love the way that your poems have an almost conversational tone, though it is no conversation I know or have experienced. It'd be nice though, then, perhaps, people would be saying things worth saying.

Yes Yes!!! ;)



I love it. I am not sure you want me to comment but I just love this poem.

You can comment, sweets. Happy you liked it!



Sometimes I don't like the conversational tone that FifthElement refers to, but here it appealed to me.

Yeah I understand that, it's just not going to appeal to everybody all the time. Glad this one snatched ya though.


I love the way you began the poem, (the first three words) and the first stanza in general. There are just so many things in this first stanza.
The rest of the poem is also wonderful, especially the last stanza.
I just love the freedom in this poem. It moved me very much. It is one of the best poems I've read in here.

:eek: Wha...uh, well, a..ek...er...:blush: Thanks, sweets. ;)