Homecoming

[ampoule]

Homecoming

She looked so tiny and frail and lost.
He tried to look through her sadness
but when she caught him at it,
she looked away.
Her eyes would tell the secret if she
was truly glad to see him, but for now
he turned his head and shook away
the care of it.
She stood erect and he reached for her,
seeking a sweet kiss of hello.
He nuzzled his nose in her curly black hair
and pulled her body close to his.
I could not see how, or if, she responded
but I could see in his face, the sinking,
his worst fear realized, but still, he took
her small hand and kissed her fingers.
They turned and walked away.
The drive was long and quiet.
He wondered if she would notice the flowers
he had picked all by himself, for her.

[TheFifthElement]

:bawling:

ampoule, you have such a talent. This is a beautiful, touching poem and, yes, how sad. I loved it. These lines especially brought the emotion home :




She looked so tiny and frail and lost.
He tried to look through her sadness



Her eyes would tell the secret if she
was truly glad to see him, but for now
he turned his head and shook away
the care of it.



I could not see how, or if, she responded
but I could see in his face, the sinking,
his worst fear realized, but still, he took
her small hand and kissed her fingers. :bawling:



He wondered if she would notice the flowers
he had picked all by himself, for her.

which is most of the poem, isn't it!

[firefangled]

Homecoming

She looked so tiny and frail and lost.
He tried to look through her sadness
but when she caught him at it,
she looked away.
Her eyes would tell the secret if she
was truly glad to see him, but for now
he turned his head and shook away
the care of it.
She stood erect and he reached for her,
seeking a sweet kiss of hello.
He nuzzled his nose in her curly black hair
and pulled her body close to his.
I could not see how, or if, she responded
but I could see in his face, the sinking,
his worst fear realized, but still, he took
her small hand and kissed her fingers.
They turned and walked away.
The drive was long and quiet.
He wondered if she would notice the flowers
he had picked all by himself, for her.

You have such an amazing heart and the skill to show it in words. This is so very touching in every detail.

[mazHur]

Nice.
How about replacing 'tiny' with 'frigid' in the first line

[manny2]

Thats really sad, but really good.. hopefully it was your imagination and not something you had to go through.

[dibyendra]

This is really touching and sad one ampoule and I loved every line of it. This one is really figurative and from your voice we can put ourselves into your poem and can feel the way you felt. I really appreciate this one and wishing to write the way you have written someday.

Keep up your good work ampoule. :thumbs_up

Best,
Dibyendra

[ampoule]

I thank you all so very much. The poem is about a dear friend who lives a few thousand miles from me. He was welcoming home his girlfriend whose son had been killed in a tragic accident. The only thing he told me was that he had picked flowers. The rest is pure conjecture, although I did have a hint that their relationship was already strained.

and p.s.
She has curly black hair and that's me over there hiding behind her red hair. ;)
<- <- <- <- <-

[motherhubbard]

Oh Amp, how lovely! I would love to see a part 2 with a happy ending