Share you love experiences......

[ahsiam]

Are you in love with someone?
how did you meet the first time? what happened actually?
love at first sight (flickering of eyes, ;) ) or love at first chat........?
or was it first a friend then a "friend"? :p
are you having any problem? share it. we all can help you solve it out.
or are looking for a love? tell us about the dream boy/girl.....
please share your experiences.

edit: I am sorry the caption says "you" when its supposed to be "your". (typo)

[blazeofglory]

Are you in love with someone?
how did you meet the first time? what happened actually?
love at first sight (flickering of eyes, ;) ) or love at first chat........?
or was it first a friend then a "friend"? :p
are you having any problem? share it. we all can help you solve it out.
or are looking for a love? tell us about the dream boy/girl.....
please share your experiences.

edit: I am sorry the caption says "you" when its supposed to be "your". (typo)

Ahsiam, This is really a sweet appeal.

In my case love happened naturally. Mine is an arranged marriage, for in my part of the world it is fixed. Someone from my close relatives arranged a girl for me and indeed the very first look was irresistible and I hooked on to her.

I love her with all her weaknesses the way she is, and she too reciprocates th eway I am. We are a conservative family. Our strengths are we can share.
That is a bit I feel like sharing with you.

[Pensive]

Define love, please. :D

[ahsiam]

Ahsiam, This is really a sweet appeal.

In my case love happened naturally. Mine is an arranged marriage, for in my part of the world it is fixed. Someone from my close relatives arranged a girl for me and indeed the very first look was irresistible and I hooked on to her.

I love her with all her weaknesses the way she is, and she too reciprocates th eway I am. We are a conservative family. Our strengths are we can share.
That is a bit I feel like sharing with you.

thank you very much for sharing,blaze. she must be a very lucky girl.
wishing you a great life with her.:)


Define love, please. :D

well pensive, love is difficult to define. its a strong feeling born inside you and stays for rest of your life. its different.

[Pensive]

well pensive, love is difficult to define.
Can't help asking difficult questions!


its a strong feeling born inside you and stays for rest of your life. its different.

Sounds good. Different from what? :)

[applepie]

Love for me just sort of happened. The man I'm married to was a close friend years before we became a couple. We actually were working together at my first job. I had just turned 15 and he was 3 years older than me. Anyway, I tried dating other people, but he was always there. After a particularly bad breakup, he was the one who dried my tears and comforted me. After that, things became tense. We had been pressured to date for some time by mutual friends and it dawned on us that we just might want the same thing. The rest is pretty much history:)

[Koa]

Ahsiam, This is really a sweet appeal.

In my case love happened naturally. Mine is an arranged marriage, for in my part of the world it is fixed. Someone from my close relatives arranged a girl for me and indeed the very first look was irresistible and I hooked on to her.

I love her with all her weaknesses the way she is, and she too reciprocates th eway I am. We are a conservative family. Our strengths are we can share.
That is a bit I feel like sharing with you.


Wow interesting. What if you hadn't liked each other? Do you think you have been lucky because you happened to like each other?

As for me, I have trouble believing even in the existence of what movies call "love", and my love life is a notorious tragedy, or rather a grotesque series of grotesque events :lol: about which I complain way too often, although it can be truly funny to think about when I am in a good mood. Which is not often :lol:

[Bakiryu]

I'm not in love with anyone, never have been. I do date from time to time but I found most people a tad boring (or they just want to get into your pants).

I'm love with myself I guess :D

[Pensive]

Wow interesting. What if you hadn't liked each other? Do you think you have been lucky because you happened to like each other?

My mother (who had an arranged marriage) and my aunt (who also had an arranged marriage) always said that first there is marriage, then love. "What if no love comes even after the marriage?" I asked my mother.
"Then there is compromise," that's what she said.

In our society here, arranged marriage is as common as having Holy Quran in a house. Probably not this much, but the difference would be like that between the numbers 19 and 20. (rough estimation) Many times it happens that husband and wife don't like each other but they have to, to live their lives. And 'this have to' can you know force you to do many things and even if they can't get this feeling by then, they have to compromise because then there is no way back. (divorce is not considered a good thing in our society) Especially the status of a divorced woman is considered very low in most of the places...

Anyway, if it would have been a love marriage, who could have been sure that the love stayed for all the life? Mostly, I have seen love marriages failing more than arranged ones. Guy claims he loves a girl, girl does that too. Girl's parents don't want that marriage to happen but the girl leaves the house for the sake of this guy and gets married to him. For sometime their marriage stays but after sometime he leaves her too claiming that he has started to love some other person. Girl is sometimes divorced (or if the second wife of hus husband is kind enough not to get her dicorved, she stays there) otherwise she has no home back and as I said before, a divorced woman is in most places frowned upon here. So she has to live with people taunting all around her. And as she has already left her parents and everyone, she can't just go back to them too...otherwise the family might have had pressurized the guy not to leave her (yay the power of a family!)

Oops I was narrating some sort of drama, but this is reality too.


As for me, I have trouble believing even in the existence of what movies call "love", and my love life is a notorious tragedy, or rather a grotesque series of grotesque events :lol: about which I complain way too often, although it can be truly funny to think about when I am in a good mood. Which is not often :lol:

Yeah, love can be evil, as I always say!

[Bakiryu]

arranged marriage

Yikes! If I had to marry someone by someone else's will I would commit suicide.
I can think of few worse punishments.

[NikolaiI]

I always fall in love pretty damn fast, and it doesn't have to be a sexual thing, as I fall in love with a book, author, guitar, music, etc., as well as with girls.

Me: looking for friends, always, as well as looking for a girl to spend time and have fun with. I think the most idiotic thing is to reject people as friends/lovers, based on their religion, which I just got into a stupid argument with my best friend over...*sigh*

Still can't share many love experiences.

Brings to mind the lyric

"So I hope you see that I
Would love to love you
And that she will cry
When she learns we are two,
and I couldn't stand the pain,
And I would be said if our new love was in vain..."

I think they (the Beatles, and that song was "If I Fell") express all that gooey, mushy stuff very well in a lot of their songs...my current opinion is that you might as well try to make yourself as perfect as possible so your future friends can depend on you, since that's a goal that makes since no matter what you want.

[Mortis Anarchy]

I'm not in love with anyone, never have been. I do date from time to time but I found most people a tad boring (or they just want to get into your pants).

I'm love with myself I guess :D

Haha, yeah, I've never fallen in love.

I've found some people to be physically attractive and mentally/personality wise attractive...but never love.

My friends say I'm to picky and thats why I don't date. Oh well, I don't care. I'm having fun...

I figure I'll just know when it happens.

[Pensive]

Yikes! If I had to marry someone by someone else's will I would commit suicide.
I can think of few worse punishments.

An arranged marriage doesn't have to be against 'your' will. Though in a few cases, the consent of the boy/girl (mostly girl) is not taken and this is what I am against too but an arranged marriage just doesn't mean that. What if two people are fine with the choices of their parents/relatives/friends? It's like the other people play as match-maker. And you trust them in that. That's also arranged marriage.

[BulletproofDork]

The first time I fell in love????






When I first laid eyes on a cup of coffee. :p

[Pensive]

The first time I fell in love????






When I first laid eyes on a cup of coffee. :p


:D

My first memory of falling in love has been of when I was probably six-seven, seeing in a dream a flower-vase crossing the window and I just fell in love with that dream sexretly hoping that it would appear again. Every night I would think of it and pray to have a dream about it (my mother used to say that whatever we are thinking can tend to appear in our dreams) but alas, no success in that. :(

[scarlet pain]

looks cool. seems like everyone is talking about love. i could share some other day, not today. ;)

[ahsiam]

its ok pensive. :)


Different from what? :)

different from every other strong feeling. people who falls in love, they know.
its heavenly.


:D

My first memory of falling in love has been of when I was probably six-seven, seeing in a dream a flower-vase crossing the window and I just fell in love with that dream sexretly hoping that it would appear again. Every night I would think of it and pray to have a dream about it (my mother used to say that whatever we are thinking can tend to appear in our dreams) but alas, no success in that. :(

like you i had a dream too. it was a little girl (me) with a puppy, playing together in a green forest where light and shadow used to play hide and seek.
like you i also wish for that dream to appear again. but it doesn't. :(


Love for me just sort of happened. The man I'm married to was a close friend years before we became a couple. We actually were working together at my first job. I had just turned 15 and he was 3 years older than me. Anyway, I tried dating other people, but he was always there. After a particularly bad breakup, he was the one who dried my tears and comforted me. After that, things became tense. We had been pressured to date for some time by mutual friends and it dawned on us that we just might want the same thing. The rest is pretty much history:)

wow berry, your life is just like a movie.:)


The first time I fell in love????






When I first laid eyes on a cup of coffee. :p

ha...ha...ha.:lol: you are just like me and symphony.:p

[symphony]

Hmmmm since its one of my best friends up there asking to share experiences, i guess i'd better answer!

There are many, so many its hard to keep track actually...but well those who stand upright in my love-ly boulevard are--
Rabindranath Tagore...who made me go nuts over him the first time i began to relate to his poems.
Nazrul... same story., and gosh his poems are so strong and macho! :lol:
Sukanto Bhattacharya....and again the same damned story! Too bad he died at 21, i could try hitting on him had he been alive (though he'd be some 60-70 years older than me that way, but hell who cares!).

And then there was...

Wait! Have i been naming just dead people so far?
Its just that...erm...all the smart guys are either too old or just dead! (duh!) :(

Hang on i've got that window-tree too in my list, and guess what?! It's alive! It's alive!!! :D

[Bakiryu]

The first time I fell in love????

When I first laid eyes on a cup of coffee. :p

Or when I first bit into a piece of chocolate :p

:lol:


http://i170.photobucket.com/albums/u279/ussheartbreaker/Chocolate.jpg

[cactus]

My first love was when I was 12 when this boy who was 5 years older then me followed me around. He was tall and rather handsome but being so young I had no idea of his intention. This was during the time my family lived in those highrises (public housing). I spent many summer afternoons playing with the kids in the adjacent buildings. Our favourite past-time was water bombs. I remember that summer, someone was continually targeting me from the roof of a building. I got really angry and shouted that if whoever did it would not stop I would come up there and poke his eyes out (yes I was a verbally nasty little girl). Anyway, there were gossips among the kids that there was this man (he was only 17 but to us kids, he was a man no less) in love with me. I was furious but had no idea who. One day we had a blackout and there he was at our front door holding out a batterised lantern and a couple of torches. He was very shy. He didn't look at me at first. He told my parents that his mother had sent him over with the light (of course, I later learnt that it was not true). My father was polite and invited him in. He stayed for a good 1/2 hour but said nothing to me. On his way out, he mumbled something very unintelligible. Two days later, I received a card and a love heart brooch from him. I was shock and later thrilled at the idea that someone was in love with me, especially someone so old. I have had a few encounters with boys who thought they were in love with me but not someone as old as he.

Anyway, after telling my friends about him, it became known that I was his girlfriend. He walked me home every afternoon and attempted to hold my hand once but I did not allow it.

One day my family went on a holiday for two weeks. When I returned there were rumours that he was seen with this other girl. I was very angry and decided to give him back his brooch. I had no idea what I was doing but at the time, I thought it was appropriate to break up with someone if he cheated on you. He was very much heartbroken and tried to see me, to talk to me but I refused. I told him I never want to talk to him again. After 3 weeks, he stopped trying.

Anyway, 4 years later, when I was 16, I accidentally met him in the street. He said hi and then quickly turned the other way. Two weeks later, I received a card from him. He told he had always loved me. Unfortunately, I never saw him again.

[Bakiryu]

Wow, you were so strange Cactus (no offense intended). Poor guy too.

[livelaughlove]

Oh, what a timely topic this is!
Well I wrote out this long narrative of my "relationship" with this one boy but I feel like it's something I need to keep private. But I will share that there is this one boy I like very, very much but who will not date me because I am not Christian. I am not upset; I understand but of course I am devestated because I have never met someone like him before. But I have gained a friend - a very good friend - so I am not unhappy. In the past month I have seriously thought about God and life and I daresay, have begun believing. I do not believe in changing myself for a boy, though so I want to make sure this is a change that I made for myself. But no worries - I know that as long as I remain true to myself and true to God I know I cannot go wrong. I am not doing this for him. I want to make that clear; and I only mention it because it is a big part of our relationship.
We haven't talked in two days - which is a long time for us. I am glad he is here for me and I am glad I am here for him - and I do believe I am starting to accept him as a friend instead of more - but if anyone has gone through this or something similar... I would love some words of advice.. he wants to be friends but I guess emotionally, I want something more... I want to be able to hold him and hug him and cuddle with him... and I love him for who he is, even with his imperfections which I do see... so I guess I can only do that from afar? I can only love him as a friend? Nobody knows what the future will bring.

[AdoreroDio]

livelaughlove (love the name by the way) I know sort of how you feel. I'm glad you are choosing not to change your beliefs based on your love for him, he probably wouldn't want you to either, but I am glad that you're coming to know God. The thing is it is completely probable that you can love him as friend, even as a brother in Christ later on, and that love can bud into something even more special that is mutual between you two. Be patient, what will be will be.
That is how it sort of happened to me. Long story though.

I am only sixteen and am not yet married but have found the love of my life. My best friend. I have known him since I was able to walk. He is a Christian (as am I) and we have never dated or told each other the extent of our feelings, though they're obvious. But the thing is, knowing him as a friend he has drawn me closer to God and has made it easier to except him as my greatest, and best friend. He is the only guy I have ever met who is.....I don't know how to describe it, perfect to me with all his imperfections. Anyways, maybe I will never marry him, but I do love him and know I always will. Once at a youth camp for my church I was worshiping God and had this, i don't know, I guess you could call it a vision, that I know God gave me of me and him, always together in the future.

My friend has taught me that my love for God has to come first before my love for him or anything else. Both of us are focused on school and that is the main reason I think we aren't dating or have even talked about it...... but I don't mind because I have the greatest friend and lover I could ask for in God and He gave me a wonderful earthly friend.

That is Love.

[cactus]

Wow, you were so strange Cactus (no offense intended). Poor guy too.

No worries, I am not that easily offended. If you knew the sort of a child I was, you wouldn’t find me so strange. I was rather thick headed in the romance department. I hated boys then and quite frankly, I don’t even know why he loved me in the first place. I think at the time I was in love with the idea of being in love. I had no concept of what it meant.

I am ashamed to admit I have broken a fair few hearts during my growing up years. I was that dumb when it comes to love! If I had to hit myself for every folly I made in relation to someone else’s heart, I think I would be black and blue all over.

I do have another quite sad story about a very close friend of mine whom I broke his heart twice. We are still good friends.

I met Jason (sorry, I have to change the name just in case anyone here might know him) on the way back from a camping trip. I was 16 at the time and he was just a few years older. We were all in the coach when my older sister called me to come and listen to Jason speak. His Vietnamese wasn’t too good and my sister found it funny. She was right and I told him I thought he sounded very cute. It was just that. Two weeks later, a guy friend of mine approached me and introduced Jason. He said since I had met Jason, would it it be all right for him to have my number. Honestly, I couldn’t remember who he was, let alone his name but I didn’t want to embarrass myself so I said o.k. Jason rang me that night and we spoke for an hour. Although I enjoyed his wit and conversation, I was not the type to speak on the phone for hours and hours, especially with a boy. By that time, I recalled who he was and we seemed to have many things in common. He was very funny and I seemed to bump into him a fair bit in the days that followed. Anyway, after 2 weeks he called and said that he was head over heels for me and would I mind being his girlfriend. At the time, I found his idea of lovers’ first sight ludicrous and told him that what he felt for me was just an infatuation, nothing more. I told him that if he still felt the same in two years time, he could call me and I would think about it. The poor guy called a few times after that but I couldn’t see the point of talking to him on the phone when he kept on talking about being in love with me. I shut him off completely.

Two years later at a graduation party, I met Jason again. I was convinced that he was over his childish infatuation and so I treated him like any old acquaintance. Three weeks later, he called me and told me that if he said he still loved me would I change my mind about him being only infatuated with me. To this, I had no answer. He started to send flowers with lines from Shakespear. I was too scared and confused and so I ignored him. His guy friend (who was also my friend) called one day and begged me to consider giving him a chance. He told me Jason broke up with his girlfriend one week after seeing me at the graduation party because upon seeing me again, he knew no other would do for him. In hearing this, although I felt sorry for him and his girlfriend, I had also concluded that he must be mad. Funny thing is it took another two years, before I finally saw the real Jason. Although I could never love him, beyond that of a close friend, I have come to appreciate his sincerity and purity of the heart. As for Jason, I think he had such a big heart he would forgive me for any crime I might have committed against him. Truly, sometimes I don’t think I deserve his friendship.

[applepie]

wow berry, your life is just like a movie.:)

:lol: It's not quite that interesting, but I guess it does follow the stereotype a bit. Best friends fall in love and life happily ever after:p

[Chava]

Hmm, Well here's a sad one. My dear beloved and I split after over two years. The odd thing is that we still love each other, and I eventually decided to part because i couldn't see our relationship coming to any natural end. And frankly, though I love him tremendously, I'm not ready to commit to anything at the age of 19, life's a buffet right?
It's ironic, as I remember very clearly the day I realised that i was deeply in love, and to this day, I still feel the deep plunge in my stomach when thinking of him. I remember that day, how happy I was to have met Jarl, and to have aknowledged that I was in love. And I remember thinking what a pity it was that we could not have met later in life.
So, Now I've broken his heart, I'm terribly sorry for it. All the posters and painitngs he gave me are on my walls, and the books we've both read haunt me. But part of me finds great comfort in his inevitable presence in my life. I'm glad to have him with me, and I hope one day he'll be able to take me out of the box, in which he has placed everything that may once have been mine.

[motherhubbard]

When I was younger I was a sight to behold. It has its disadvantages. Anyway, after a while one can really come to hate men.

When I met my husband I was engaged to another man, well a boy I had gone to high school with and had had a crush on since the seventh grade. We had been together for two years (that time) and even though we were supposed to get married that winter I found myself trying to dig my heals in to stop the process. I think he was gay which is great if you don’t really like men, but not the best quality in a husband.

I was working at the police depart when I met my husband and he just really wowed me! I would get a rash whenever he was around. That was very unusual behavior for someone who really didn’t care much for men. We dated for over a year in secret because it was against the rules; I think that may have fueled the flames. Once I took a different job things just took on their own pace and it wasn’t always a happy time. One day after two years of on again off again romance we broke up and it was such a relief to me. But then one week later we got engaged and planned to marry in about four months (he’s handsome and persuasive!) then all of a sudden we just decided to get married and did. Just like that. I’m glad too.

The thing about passionate love or arranged marriages is that marriage is like a business and it must be worked in much that way. Everyone who has been married for any length of time can tell you that there are days you wonder what you got yourself into. Really you have to decide everyday to be happy and in love. Love is not so much an emotion or how one feels for another but it is what you do and how you treat the other.

[cactus]

Everyone who has been married for any length of time can tell you that there are days you wonder what you got yourself into. Really you have to decide everyday to be happy and in love. Love is not so much an emotion or how one feels for another but it is what you do and how you treat the other.

Thanks motherhubbard, I find so much wisdom in this.


So, Now I've broken his heart, I'm terribly sorry for it. All the posters and painitngs he gave me are on my walls, and the books we've both read haunt me. But part of me finds great comfort in his inevitable presence in my life. I'm glad to have him with me, and I hope one day he'll be able to take me out of the box, in which he has placed everything that may once have been mine.

Hi Chava, I think sometimes it is all about timing. I find your words very moving and could feel the depth of your emotions. It is sad but that is the way of life. Sometimes I think if I have met a few of the guys at a later date when I am more mature and when they knew how to get to me, perhaps I might have ended up with one of them.. but hey we can't live on the "what ifs" right? Currently I am happy and I am glad that I had those experiences because they shaped me into the person I am today. If things did not happen for any other reason, I think they happened for that reason alone.

[RobinHood3000]

Same chemistry class. Incredible chemistry. Simple as that. <3

[BulletproofDork]

Or when I first bit into a piece of chocolate :p

:lol:


http://i170.photobucket.com/albums/u279/ussheartbreaker/Chocolate.jpg


. . . .My shirt is wet from all that drooling.

[Pensive]

He told me Jason broke up with his girlfriend one week after seeing me at the graduation party because upon seeing me again, he knew no other would do for him.


I think he had such a big heart he would forgive me for any crime I might have committed against him.

I am really not sure cactus if I can decide I have any sympathy for Jason and if he had really a 'big heart' because you just mentioned here that he broke up with his girlfriend just because he saw you there. As I am an outsider and don't know the details (the girl might have had wanted him to do so herself) but I don't think it was really nice of him. If he could do that to his girlfriend for you, he might have had left you for someone-he-would-have-thought-better-than-you?

[cactus]

I am really not sure cactus if I can decide I have any sympathy for Jason and if he had really a 'big heart' because you just mentioned here that he broke up with his girlfriend just because he saw you there. As I am an outsider and don't know the details (the girl might have had wanted him to do so herself) but I don't think it was really nice of him. If he could do that to his girlfriend for you, he might have had left you for someone-he-would-have-thought-better-than-you?

That is so right. I had the same reaction when I first heard it. I really thought he was mad. Later when we were both older and I heard the rest of the story I developed empathy for him... I won't go into details though.

[NikolaiI]

It would have been more interesting, motherhubbard, if you husband had been gay when you met him, until you turned him straight! But then, you might be happy having to wonder about relapses...

[ahsiam]

[
My first love was when I was 12 when this boy who was 5 years older then me followed me around. He was tall and rather handsome but being so young I had no idea of his intention. This was during the time my family lived in those highrises (public housing). I spent many summer afternoons playing with the kids in the adjacent buildings. Our favourite past-time was water bombs. I remember that summer, someone was continually targeting me from the roof of a building. I got really angry and shouted that if whoever did it would not stop I would come up there and poke his eyes out (yes I was a verbally nasty little girl). Anyway, there were gossips among the kids that there was this man (he was only 17 but to us kids, he was a man no less) in love with me. I was furious but had no idea who. One day we had a blackout and there he was at our front door holding out a batterised lantern and a couple of torches. He was very shy. He didn't look at me at first. He told my parents that his mother had sent him over with the light (of course, I later learnt that it was not true). My father was polite and invited him in. He stayed for a good 1/2 hour but said nothing to me. On his way out, he mumbled something very unintelligible. Two days later, I received a card and a love heart brooch from him. I was shock and later thrilled at the idea that someone was in love with me, especially someone so old. I have had a few encounters with boys who thought they were in love with me but not someone as old as he.

Anyway, after telling my friends about him, it became known that I was his girlfriend. He walked me home every afternoon and attempted to hold my hand once but I did not allow it.

One day my family went on a holiday for two weeks. When I returned there were rumours that he was seen with this other girl. I was very angry and decided to give him back his brooch. I had no idea what I was doing but at the time, I thought it was appropriate to break up with someone if he cheated on you. He was very much heartbroken and tried to see me, to talk to me but I refused. I told him I never want to talk to him again. After 3 weeks, he stopped trying.

Anyway, 4 years later, when I was 16, I accidentally met him in the street. He said hi and then quickly turned the other way. Two weeks later, I received a card from him. He told he had always loved me. Unfortunately, I never saw him again.

thanks for sharing.it was very nice read but.................sigh..........
i dont know how old you are but i hope that you will meet him again.:)


No worries, I am not that easily offended. If you knew the sort of a child I was, you wouldn’t find me so strange. I was rather thick headed in the romance department. I hated boys then and quite frankly, I don’t even know why he loved me in the first place. I think at the time I was in love with the idea of being in love. I had no concept of what it meant.

I am ashamed to admit I have broken a fair few hearts during my growing up years. I was that dumb when it comes to love! If I had to hit myself for every folly I made in relation to someone else’s heart, I think I would be black and blue all over.

I do have another quite sad story about a very close friend of mine whom I broke his heart twice. We are still good friends.

I met Jason (sorry, I have to change the name just in case anyone here might know him) on the way back from a camping trip. I was 16 at the time and he was just a few years older. We were all in the coach when my older sister called me to come and listen to Jason speak. His Vietnamese wasn’t too good and my sister found it funny. She was right and I told him I thought he sounded very cute. It was just that. Two weeks later, a guy friend of mine approached me and introduced Jason. He said since I had met Jason, would it it be all right for him to have my number. Honestly, I couldn’t remember who he was, let alone his name but I didn’t want to embarrass myself so I said o.k. Jason rang me that night and we spoke for an hour. Although I enjoyed his wit and conversation, I was not the type to speak on the phone for hours and hours, especially with a boy. By that time, I recalled who he was and we seemed to have many things in common. He was very funny and I seemed to bump into him a fair bit in the days that followed. Anyway, after 2 weeks he called and said that he was head over heels for me and would I mind being his girlfriend. At the time, I found his idea of lovers’ first sight ludicrous and told him that what he felt for me was just an infatuation, nothing more. I told him that if he still felt the same in two years time, he could call me and I would think about it. The poor guy called a few times after that but I couldn’t see the point of talking to him on the phone when he kept on talking about being in love with me. I shut him off completely.

Two years later at a graduation party, I met Jason again. I was convinced that he was over his childish infatuation and so I treated him like any old acquaintance. Three weeks later, he called me and told me that if he said he still loved me would I change my mind about him being only infatuated with me. To this, I had no answer. He started to send flowers with lines from Shakespear. I was too scared and confused and so I ignored him. His guy friend (who was also my friend) called one day and begged me to consider giving him a chance. He told me Jason broke up with his girlfriend one week after seeing me at the graduation party because upon seeing me again, he knew no other would do for him. In hearing this, although I felt sorry for him and his girlfriend, I had also concluded that he must be mad. Funny thing is it took another two years, before I finally saw the real Jason. Although I could never love him, beyond that of a close friend, I have come to appreciate his sincerity and purity of the heart. As for Jason, I think he had such a big heart he would forgive me for any crime I might have committed against him. Truly, sometimes I don’t think I deserve his friendship.

well cactus..............its upto you. may be you were right. or you made mistakes. .................i just hope for your best, :)


Hmm, Well here's a sad one. My dear beloved and I split after over two years. The odd thing is that we still love each other, and I eventually decided to part because i couldn't see our relationship coming to any natural end. And frankly, though I love him tremendously, I'm not ready to commit to anything at the age of 19, life's a buffet right?
It's ironic, as I remember very clearly the day I realised that i was deeply in love, and to this day, I still feel the deep plunge in my stomach when thinking of him. I remember that day, how happy I was to have met Jarl, and to have aknowledged that I was in love. And I remember thinking what a pity it was that we could not have met later in life.
So, Now I've broken his heart, I'm terribly sorry for it. All the posters and painitngs he gave me are on my walls, and the books we've both read haunt me. But part of me finds great comfort in his inevitable presence in my life. I'm glad to have him with me, and I hope one day he'll be able to take me out of the box, in which he has placed everything that may once have been mine.

i will pray for your nice future.:)


When I was younger I was a sight to behold. It has its disadvantages. Anyway, after a while one can really come to hate men.

When I met my husband I was engaged to another man, well a boy I had gone to high school with and had had a crush on since the seventh grade. We had been together for two years (that time) and even though we were supposed to get married that winter I found myself trying to dig my heals in to stop the process. I think he was gay which is great if you don’t really like men, but not the best quality in a husband.

I was working at the police depart when I met my husband and he just really wowed me! I would get a rash whenever he was around. That was very unusual behavior for someone who really didn’t care much for men. We dated for over a year in secret because it was against the rules; I think that may have fueled the flames. Once I took a different job things just took on their own pace and it wasn’t always a happy time. One day after two years of on again off again romance we broke up and it was such a relief to me. But then one week later we got engaged and planned to marry in about four months (he’s handsome and persuasive!) then all of a sudden we just decided to get married and did. Just like that. I’m glad too.

The thing about passionate love or arranged marriages is that marriage is like a business and it must be worked in much that way. Everyone who has been married for any length of time can tell you that there are days you wonder what you got yourself into. Really you have to decide everyday to be happy and in love. Love is not so much an emotion or how one feels for another but it is what you do and how you treat the other.

wow! ...have a very happy life,motherhubbard.:)

[cactus]

well cactus..............its upto you. may be you were right. or you made mistakes. .................i just hope for your best, :)

Thanks Ahsiam,

I believe when it comes to romance, there is 30&#37; human error, 30% miss opportunities and 40% fate.

If I have the opportunity to meet all of those guys I have hurt, I would first of all apologise for having bruised/broke their hearts.... and then I would congratulate them on their narrow escape!

[Koa]

Anyway, after a while one can really come to hate men.



Oh that's for sure!
Chocolate is much better than men, it's always there when you need it (or just a purchase away) and makes no differences, it loves you back if you love it. LOL :brow:

If there was a school to become a lesbian, I'd sign up, but I am unfortunately attracted to men. They're not attracted to me though :lol:



Oh, what a timely topic this is!
Well I wrote out this long narrative of my "relationship" with this one boy but I feel like it's something I need to keep private. But I will share that there is this one boy I like very, very much but who will not date me because I am not Christian.

:eek: Now it's dangerous for me to say something like this on a forum such as this, but I can't understand that. People who can't have a serene relationship with other people because of religion. Bah...
Even though I guess cultural differences might play a role, like I would have a hard time with, say, a Muslim guy as our cultures are so different... but then chances are I wouldn't fall in love with a Muslim guy because there probably would be something in our cultural differences that wouldn't work out if you see what I mean... Even if even cultural differences can be made up for if the couple wants it, and there's many examples of that in the world...

I feel much better about being in love with boys who turned out to be homosexuals, at least I know it's not something they chose but a natural I think I can't do anything about, and I can enjoy my time with that even if there can't be anything deeper.

[NikolaiI]

I actually got into a fight with my friend over the phone about that. He moved to Seattle and now he's working and going to school; I asked him about girls and he said he'd met some nice ones but none he'd want to date. I asked him why, were they not good enough for him? Just kind of teasing, but he said sort of. He wouldn't want to get involved with someone not the same religion; his reason made sense but I can't copy it exactly here. Something about a relationship that would eventually fail because of pressures- but not exactly because of religion, but still that's his reason- anyway we got into a fight over it and I felt bad afterwards. Since then I've tried to re-examine why I care what other people think and do. Why force my opinions on others, in any way? It's shameful and destructive. :( But don't worry 'bout our friendship, that'll always be fine. (I know you were worried.)

[ahsiam]

Or when I first bit into a piece of chocolate :p

:lol:


http://i170.photobucket.com/albums/u279/ussheartbreaker/Chocolate.jpg

god bakiryu!!! what is this?!! I AM DROOLING!!!!!!!!!! AND NOW I DONT HAVE ANY CHOCKLET:bawling: :bawling:

[applepie]

god bakiryu!!! what is this?!! I AM DROOLING!!!!!!!!!! AND NOW I DONT HAVE ANY CHOCKLET:bawling: :bawling:

That does look delicious. I'm drooling just looking at the picture:lol: If I had to guess I would say it looks like truffles. They're one of my favorite.

[Koa]

QUESTION:
what do you think of dating through ads? I am tempted, but it would feel like surrendering to the awareness that I can't get anyone the "normal" way, and I feel that, should I meet someone interesting, what will happen will always be diminished by how it started. (I had a similar experience and this was one factor that made it horrible).
Plus well...at least meeting someone on a forum needs some dialogue, some playing, just like in real life but on a virtual level... while answering to an ad feels so cold, like answering to a job ad...
But I often find myself considering it, and I sometimes browse a website where there are such ads. 99&#37; of them are openly sexual offers and I look at them to have a laugh, but every now and them there are some serious sounding ones. I read one by a guy saying things I can really relate to - IF they are true. Of course that alone doesn't mean much, we might have totally different tastes and all, but still trying is tempting, I feel I don't have much to lose. And I have a bloody lot of free time these days.
But how do I explain it to my friends? (only my friends who've known me since my teens know about my love-unlife, but even if they are in a similar situation, they wouln'dt understand I think, and the friends I've made here don't have a clue, I never mention my love life so they probably just think I'm discreet). But if I were to meet a complete stranger it'd be sensible to let someone know about it beforehand, so that they can be ready near the phone should somthing bad happen (even if I'm pretty good at telling good from bad online, but precautions are never too many)...

[manolia]

QUESTION:
what do you think of dating through ads? I am tempted, but it would feel like surrendering to the awareness that I can't get anyone the "normal" way, and I feel that, should I meet someone interesting, what will happen will always be diminished by how it started. (I had a similar experience and this was one factor that made it horrible).
Plus well...at least meeting someone on a forum needs some dialogue, some playing, just like in real life but on a virtual level... while answering to an ad feels so cold, like answering to a job ad...
But I often find myself considering it, and I sometimes browse a website where there are such ads. 99% of them are openly sexual offers and I look at them to have a laugh, but every now and them there are some serious sounding ones. I read one by a guy saying things I can really relate to - IF they are true. Of course that alone doesn't mean much, we might have totally different tastes and all, but still trying is tempting, I feel I don't have much to lose. And I have a bloody lot of free time these days.
But how do I explain it to my friends? (only my friends who've known me since my teens know about my love-unlife, but even if they are in a similar situation, they wouln'dt understand I think, and the friends I've made here don't have a clue, I never mention my love life so they probably just think I'm discreet). But if I were to meet a complete stranger it'd be sensible to let someone know about it beforehand, so that they can be ready near the phone should somthing bad happen (even if I'm pretty good at telling good from bad online, but precautions are never too many)...

Koa, i don't think it is wrong or bad to respond to an ad or meet someone in a forum..i mean people meet somewhere, don't they? Does it matter where? Is it better or normal, to meet someone in a bar or your work environment? What matters is to meet the guy (i mean in person) and see if you have things in common and if what he said in his ad was true etc etc. I mean that as technology advances and blah blah blah (you can fill the blanks yourself ;) ) there are new ways to meet and keep in touch with people.
I only want to add that you must be careful (but you know that already ;) ) .

[Virgil]

QUESTION:
what do you think of dating through ads? I am tempted, but it would feel like surrendering to the awareness that I can't get anyone the "normal" way, and I feel that, should I meet someone interesting, what will happen will always be diminished by how it started. (I had a similar experience and this was one factor that made it horrible).
Plus well...at least meeting someone on a forum needs some dialogue, some playing, just like in real life but on a virtual level... while answering to an ad feels so cold, like answering to a job ad...
But I often find myself considering it, and I sometimes browse a website where there are such ads. 99% of them are openly sexual offers and I look at them to have a laugh, but every now and them there are some serious sounding ones. I read one by a guy saying things I can really relate to - IF they are true. Of course that alone doesn't mean much, we might have totally different tastes and all, but still trying is tempting, I feel I don't have much to lose. And I have a bloody lot of free time these days.
But how do I explain it to my friends? (only my friends who've known me since my teens know about my love-unlife, but even if they are in a similar situation, they wouln'dt understand I think, and the friends I've made here don't have a clue, I never mention my love life so they probably just think I'm discreet). But if I were to meet a complete stranger it'd be sensible to let someone know about it beforehand, so that they can be ready near the phone should somthing bad happen (even if I'm pretty good at telling good from bad online, but precautions are never too many)...

I would not recommend those sexual offers (I doubt those lead to anything serious and God knows what you'll meet up with), but there are legitamate matching agencies that connect like minded people for potential relationships. I see nothing wrong with those. I don't particularly know them first hand of course but I have heard of people (especially ladies) talking about them.

[Koa]

Koa, i don't think it is wrong or bad to respond to an ad or meet someone in a forum..i mean people meet somewhere, don't they? Does it matter where? Is it better or normal, to meet someone in a bar or your work environment? What matters is to meet the guy (i mean in person) and see if you have things in common and if what he said in his ad was true etc etc. I mean that as technology advances and blah blah blah (you can fill the blanks yourself ;) ) there are new ways to meet and keep in touch with people.
I only want to add that you must be careful (but you know that already ;) ) .

Thanks, this sounds pretty sensible in fact... but still, I think people would look down on me a lot (don't you often hear even your friends saying "I don't understand people who chat online, there must be something wrong with them"... I have....). And yes should I do it I'd definitely be really careful, only meet in crowded places etc :P
(I have met several people I've known online, but usually after chatting with them a lot so I could be 99% sure that they weren't serial killers...)


I would not recommend those sexual offers (I doubt those lead to anything serious and God knows what you'll meet up with), but there are legitamate matching agencies that connect like minded people for potential relationships. I see nothing wrong with those. I don't particularly know them first hand of course but I have heard of people (especially ladies) talking about them.

No lol I wouldn't go for a sexual ad, I can't even let people get NEAR me if I don't have full confidence, how do I go and meet a stranger who's asking for weird sexual favours? :D But as I said some people seem to have sensible request like "I'm looking for a serious girl to go out and have a chat with and see what happens", which sounds even fun. Agencies seem too official to me, like I'm really saying to the world "I have too many problems meeting people so I need an agency", plus I don't think there'd be many people my age, they usually still have hopes/a quite vibrant social life at this age....

But still, I'm not sure it all would leave me with much self-respect, assuming I have any which I'm not too sure about...:D

[Virgil]

No lol I wouldn't go for a sexual ad, I can't even let people get NEAR me if I don't have full confidence, how do I go and meet a stranger who's asking for weird sexual favours? :D
:lol: I wasn't referring to those with such explicit open offers. Actually at least you know where they're coming from. I didn't even know there were people who actually do that. I thought they would be more sly.


But as I said some people seem to have sensible request like "I'm looking for a serious girl to go out and have a chat with and see what happens", which sounds even fun. Agencies seem too official to me, like I'm really saying to the world "I have too many problems meeting people so I need an agency", plus I don't think there'd be many people my age, they usually still have hopes/a quite vibrant social life at this age....
I don't think those agency things are humiliating. If they can match you with a person with like interests and compatible personalities, what's wrong with that? It's pretty hard to stumble on a person that will make a good match. I don't however know how accurate the process is.


But still, I'm not sure it all would leave me with much self-respect, assuming I have any which I'm not too sure about...:D
Oh don't put yourself down. You're an intelligent, nice, and pretty young lady with lots of personality. :)

[Lily Adams]

Love? What is...love? *wide eyes*

I've never been in a romantic relationship. Don't care right now. Too young. Kids my age are too stupid. But I have of course been positively infatuated with someone. :blush:

One time I looked up flirting on Wikipedia. That shows you how much I know about that sort of thing.

And one time I drew a robot in love. He had a GPP, I guess. A lovesick one.

[NikolaiI]

What a wonderful thread- it has people discussing things and not hating each other!

[ahsiam]

What a wonderful thread- it has people discussing things and not hating each other!

:D i should be happy, right nikolaiI?! :p
thank you everyone who shared things here, thanks to you people who discuss with others(here) and welcome to them who are going to share. and again thanks to them who just sees it.
you guys are sooo........... wonderful.:D


QUESTION:
what do you think of dating through ads? I am tempted, but it would feel like surrendering to the awareness that I can't get anyone the "normal" way, and I feel that, should I meet someone interesting, what will happen will always be diminished by how it started. (I had a similar experience and this was one factor that made it horrible).
Plus well...at least meeting someone on a forum needs some dialogue, some playing, just like in real life but on a virtual level... while answering to an ad feels so cold, like answering to a job ad...
But I often find myself considering it, and I sometimes browse a website where there are such ads. 99% of them are openly sexual offers and I look at them to have a laugh, but every now and them there are some serious sounding ones. I read one by a guy saying things I can really relate to - IF they are true. Of course that alone doesn't mean much, we might have totally different tastes and all, but still trying is tempting, I feel I don't have much to lose. And I have a bloody lot of free time these days.
But how do I explain it to my friends? (only my friends who've known me since my teens know about my love-unlife, but even if they are in a similar situation, they wouln'dt understand I think, and the friends I've made here don't have a clue, I never mention my love life so they probably just think I'm discreet). But if I were to meet a complete stranger it'd be sensible to let someone know about it beforehand, so that they can be ready near the phone should somthing bad happen (even if I'm pretty good at telling good from bad online, but precautions are never too many)...

i agree with manolia and virgil.

[Princess_1986]

Some really interesting stories, thanks for starting it Ahsiam. It's always good to discover the tangled individual behind the avator.

I fell desperately in love at sixteen, it was a long-distance thing. So far it's lasted 5 years, but lastnight he trashed my room up and we had a big, nasty arguement. We are sweethearts, but that means nothing these days. At least not where I'm from...

And so, life is never a fairytale, and always a challenge.

[Pretty^Athens]

Ahsiam, This is really a sweet appeal.

In my case love happened naturally. Mine is an arranged marriage, for in my part of the world it is fixed. Someone from my close relatives arranged a girl for me and indeed the very first look was irresistible and I hooked on to her.

I love her with all her weaknesses the way she is, and she too reciprocates th eway I am. We are a conservative family. Our strengths are we can share.
That is a bit I feel like sharing with you.

Blaze, can i know whre are you from? your story sounds familiar!

well my story is a bit complicated... it was love at first sight at school. he was a senior and i was a freshmen. i fell in love with him when he graduted so that i stopped seeing him :( but i kept looking for him so we comunicated by emailing for almost 3 years and ended up taking on the phone. i love him so much but we're just friends (he loves me as a friend). we're doing fine now... but it hurts...

[Zelly]

Love? What is...love? *wide eyes*

I've never been in a romantic relationship. Don't care right now. Too young. Kids my age are too stupid. But I have of course been positively infatuated with someone. :blush:

One time I looked up flirting on Wikipedia. That shows you how much I know about that sort of thing.

And one time I drew a robot in love. He had a GPP, I guess. A lovesick one.

I think that's cute. lol. =)

I have the opposite problem. I flirt with everyone, but I'm not interested in them. And if they make offers I freak out. o.O It's sad.

[Pretty^Athens]

I think that's cute. lol. =)

I have the opposite problem. I flirt with everyone, but I'm not interested in them. And if they make offers I freak out. o.O It's sad.

Yeah it's not good for you Zelly... But i remember you wrote that you have a boyfriend. don't you?

[dramasnot6]

Love? What is...love? *wide eyes*

I've never been in a romantic relationship. Don't care right now. Too young. Kids my age are too stupid. But I have of course been positively infatuated with someone. :blush:

One time I looked up flirting on Wikipedia. That shows you how much I know about that sort of thing.

And one time I drew a robot in love. He had a GPP, I guess. A lovesick one.

Hehe, wise words Lily!
*listens to the Mark voice that accompanies your post*

I suppose I have had my share of youthful infatuation, puppy love and the like.
When I hear most people discussing "young love" they often do so in a way that makes it seem like it's somehow not as valid as "grown-up love". I don't know about that, can teenagers really be IN LOVE or is it just a mix of puppy love and hormones?

[Virgil]

Hehe, wise words Lily!
*listens to the Mark voice that accompanies your post*

I suppose I have had my share of youthful infatuation, puppy love and the like.
When I hear most people discussing "young love" they often do so in a way that makes it seem like it's somehow not as valid as "grown-up love". I don't know about that, can teenagers really be IN LOVE or is it just a mix of puppy love and hormones?

:lol: Even adults have puppy love and hormones. :D

[Zelly]

Yeah it's not good for you Zelly... But i remember you wrote that you have a boyfriend. don't you?

Yeah, kinda the problem, non? I get myself into a lot of trouble that way. *shrug* It's rather a big focus of mine at the moment to stop.

Especially since he's moving away, so it's gonna be quite long distance. (across the country) So, I've been toning down the flirting thing. Which, I must say though it's hard, I like myself much more when I don't. So, we'll see.

[Shalot]

I'm in love. I love the way he looked over his shoulder at me even when he was with his wife and his new baby. I love the way he couldn't stop chewing when he saw me with my new love - he couldn't take his eyes off me. i love the way he couldn't take his eyes off of me when he saw me there in my purple sweater with my husband... I hate the way we can't forget the ones we knew we'd never end up with.

[Lily Adams]

I think that's cute. lol. =)


At first I didn't know if you were talking about the robot or me, and then I was all, "Oh." XD



Hehe, wise words Lily!
*listens to the Mark voice that accompanies your post*

I suppose I have had my share of youthful infatuation, puppy love and the like.
When I hear most people discussing "young love" they often do so in a way that makes it seem like it's somehow not as valid as "grown-up love". I don't know about that, can teenagers really be IN LOVE or is it just a mix of puppy love and hormones?

You of all people should know I've been tainted. :lol:

I've wondered that myself...

[scarlet pain]

well what can i say?
haven't fallen in love yet(I'M 19 :()
but couple of infatuations when i was a new teen!
it may sound funny but i have a dream guy(i'm a very dreamy person and everything happens with me in dreams),he has this deep eyes which has voice within them,he has this beautiful innocent smile which makes my heart jump,and he has a hushed deep voice which shows personality,intensity and emotions at the same time.(oh and he has this sexy chin dimple too)
i dont care if i dont find him ever,i'd be glad to see him in my dreams and feel his presence in the air for the rest of my life!:)

[ahsiam]

well what can i say?
haven't fallen in love yet(I'M 19 :()
but couple of infatuations when i was a new teen!
it may sound funny but i have a dream guy(i'm a very dreamy person and everything happens with me in dreams),he has this deep eyes which has voice within them,he has this beautiful innocent smile which makes my heart jump,and he has a hushed deep voice which shows personality,intensity and emotions at the same time.(oh and he has this sexy chin dimple too)
i dont care if i dont find him ever,i'd be glad to see him in my dreams and feel his presence in the air for the rest of my life!:)

:lol: really?! :lol: being a very close friend what else can i do............ :lol


Some really interesting stories, thanks for starting it Ahsiam. It's always good to discover the tangled individual behind the avator.



you are most welcome.



And so, life is never a fairytale, and always a challenge.

i know life never is. i just wanna say if he loves you,everything will be fine. at least we can hope for that.....:)


I'm in love. I love the way he looked over his shoulder at me even when he was with his wife and his new baby. I love the way he couldn't stop chewing when he saw me with my new love - he couldn't take his eyes off me. i love the way he couldn't take his eyes off of me when he saw me there in my purple sweater with my husband... I hate the way we can't forget the ones we knew we'd never end up with.

yeh well sometimes things dont go like a fairy tale.
may be you were made for each other but not meant to be together.

[Shalot]

yeh well sometimes things dont go like a fairy tale.
may be you were made for each other but not meant to be together.


maybe. they say hindsight is 20/20 but on this one I still don't know what happened. i think I was mesmerized, jinxed, sleepwalking or something. Oh well, love sucks and then you die.

actually though and this is weird - the first time I saw the man I married I had an easy-going, this-is-right feeling about him (or maybe it was intution or instinct) that i had never had before. so I am certain I ended up with the right person, but this other person I guess affected me also. Maybe in another life...

[OnyxRose]

Are you in love with someone?
how did you meet the first time? what happened actually?
love at first sight (flickering of eyes, ;) ) or love at first chat........?
or was it first a friend then a "friend"? :p
are you having any problem? share it. we all can help you solve it out.
or are looking for a love? tell us about the dream boy/girl.....
please share your experiences.

I'm in love with my boyfriend, Bryan. I met him online originally in June of 2006, then we met in person. It actually didn't go so well, but we tried again and it went much better. A few months later on June 10th (the day before my birthday), he played a song for me on the guitar and asked me out.

We aren't really having any problems right now as far as the relationship goes. I'm planning on moving in with him come fall of next year when we go to the same college. Right now we live two hours apart and see each other every weekend. We take turns driving to see the other. I've never quite felt this way about anyone before. Yes, I've loved people before, but not quite like this.

[crazefest456]

Awww...I should be asking this question, considering that I have no 'experience'. I always brushed it off as hormonal imbalance in people my age (I don't trust my emotions).

[karo]

I hate the way we can't forget the ones we knew we'd never end up with.

You and me both Shalot! The one I'm trying to forget is just setting up home with another woman. I had no idea I could be so heartbroken! But I'm thinking now that maybe I had a close escape. There were warning signs that this would happen from the start. I paid no attention. I realise now that it was never meant to be.

[ahsiam]

I'm in love with my boyfriend, Bryan. I met him online originally in June of 2006, then we met in person. It actually didn't go so well, but we tried again and it went much better. A few months later on June 10th (the day before my birthday), he played a song for me on the guitar and asked me out.

We aren't really having any problems right now as far as the relationship goes. I'm planning on moving in with him come fall of next year when we go to the same college. Right now we live two hours apart and see each other every weekend. We take turns driving to see the other. I've never quite felt this way about anyone before. Yes, I've loved people before, but not quite like this.

wow............... what a wonderful life story.:) . i hope you will be just like this forever.

[RoCKiTcZa]

I have never been successful in love. For several times, I have loved... people both deserving and undeserving of my admiration... nearly twenty of them, if I am right. I can hardly remember. It all began when I was six, a student in kindergarten class, when I had a crush on a boy so nice and cuddly, with prickly hair which I believed looked nice and felt somewhat good to touch. I announced to everyone that I liked the poor kid, and it troubled him so much he cried every time I approached him. To me it was a game, yet I never knew I'd be threatening boys for the rest of my life. Only four years later did I realize that I never felt seriously for him then. I was in fourth grade, and by that time I was already halfway through my puberty stage (based on my own body clock, which, I believe, had gone too fast) that my appearance was already like that of a high-schooler. My best friend looked the same, and because of that, we were the two biggest girls in the class. We both started out Grade 4 having the same crush, however it was just too bad that the guy fancied her while I was only his second choice. Finally I tired of him and switched to a boy who, according to some overly-cheeky girls (one being my best friend in kindergarten who once urged me to give my kindergarten crush a peck on the cheek), had a crush on me. To cut a long story short, let's just say I became obsessed. Come Valentine's Day some of my friends dared me to give him a card, and in a sudden boost of hormone levels, I did as they said. Unfortunately it did not turn out as I'd expected, and he returned the card to me, crumpled up and with marker ink all over. I threw it right away. One year passed, and my "love life" was quiet. In fifth grade came the day I blurted out to a guy I liked that I had a crush on him, which he accepted, yet after that his interests turned to someone else. During that same year, I had a crush on a tiny boy who hadn't even passed his own puberty stage, which was queer; but because love sees no limits, it pushed through, and in fact, it even went as far as a letter which I wrote to him to explain why I was so obsessed, and his reply began with: "To Secret Admirer." That was my first, and only, love life success. I lost my feelings for him, however, when I stepped up to Grade 6, and had a crush on a high school guy this time, a former member of the choir I was then a member of, and a good friend of mine as well. It started when I began to text him, thinking he'd reply because he was my friend, yet I was wrong. He thought I was flirting with him and didn't take it too nicely. Instead, he told me to shut up and look for another guy as he already loved someone else, that I was the most irritating girl he'd ever met, and many other insulting things, and pretty soon we were cold-warring. In fact, we are up to now. That was my toughest experience with love that almost taught me never to love again. But I held on, seeing as I didn't want to give up on love just yet.

Now that I'm in high school, I have a crush on this certain guy whom I find a bit hard to describe. To tell the truth, he is my fourth high-school crush, however the most serious one, to my belief. Smart he may be, seeing as he can complete a Rubik's cube in an estimated time of 10 seconds, and also because he is trilingual, being able to speak English, Filipino and Spanish very fluently, and simply because he is a country boy yet was able to enter the country's "best" high school, our national science high school. I also believed he was handsome (if not for the zits... ahh poor him), but no one shared my insights in that. I was in good terms with him until he became suspicious and finally found out, and in fact he was my partner in Computer Science for a quarter of a term; if only I did not insist to go to a vacant computer to complete my work, which only tempted me to become overly obsessed and flood my Impress Presentation with pictures of him. The geekiest kid, and also the biggest-mouthed guy in class, saw it, and immediately announced it to the entire class. People immediately reacted to it and said I was obsessed. Now, he won't even talk to me. This has been going on for weeks and weeks already, and since then I've been very sad. I've been trying to get over him but for some reason I just can't. *Sigh* How I wish my Planet Love weren't as stormy a place as no one wants to dwell in it... then maybe it wouldn't appear so hopeless...

[Virgil]

Rockit, that was an amazing post. :lol: :lol: How do you even remember all that?

[NikolaiI]

I've been in love and heart-broken more than a couple times. I was a quick learner, however, and realized it was not as big a deal as I thought at first. I guess it hurts more than it should hurt. I seemed to be undesirable, even though nobody made fun of me for it or anything. So I ended up never having a girlfriend in highschool, except for one girl who lived an hour from me who I went out with for 3 weeks, until she broke up with me Christmas night, just when I'd gotten her a necklace. Sh*tty! But, there've been some other semi-successes. One girl I knew when I was 15 or 16 I was in love with. The first time I met her was when I was with two or three friends and members in my band; we'd just left someone's house and my friend Neil suggested we stop by her place. Anyway, it turned out kind of good, we just watched a movie, and she had some friends over too...didn't get to know them then, but later spent more time with her and there and sort of fell in love. I mean I was definitely in love, although...well, it seems a little strange. It was one of those for-no-reason types of things. Anyway, at one point she wanted to be with me, but I messed it up on the spot, and we were never together. One of her close friends, I also had a huge crush on, but I never got very close to. There ended up being a very interesting link of friends. A couple of my friends were a lot closer to that group of girls, guess that was my connection to them.

Anyway, I'd say hormonal and puppy love is as good as adult-love. There's no reason it should be "worse"- whatever that means- uninvestigated, misunderstood, unsubstantial- because kids can have more insight into these things than adults. Kids can be more mature. Nothing wrong with first loves- isn't the goal of a love life to have a partner and to love them and be happy, and very importantly, to grow? If I'd had a lover as a child or adolescent, I mean a true one who really loved me and were with them for years, that'd have been wonderful for me; as I would love to have that now. No reason two people couldn't grow up together, that they have to be fickle like they usually are.

The reason I have the tendency to fall in love so fast, or perhaps to idealize people, is- because I'm from a broken home? My dad always warned me it would be like this, and he warned me it's unhealthy to be so dependent on one person- especially when you haven't established a mutual attachment. I know I've missed out on a ton because I've never had more than just the one girlfriend; but I'm not worried about my relationship skills in the least, I think those are superb. I'm currently actually in love with a woman who's engaged. Sort of fell in love with her on sight, and I've known her for two or three years. Never tried to break up her and her boyfriend, or, that is, get her interested in me in a romantic way. Seems like a miserable thing to do, completely miserable. In fact in any relationship I would really not want to be possessive. Attachment comes so naturally to me; it needs no encouragement. This way I've got a warm relationship with her. I care for her and love her sincerely and I don't care that we're "only friends," I mean, I just don't think like that. I just think, "Oh, here is this person I love, that makes me feel happy;" I really can't explain it very well, I'm just not influenced by my feelings for her to act on them in a way other than friendship. It's all just stuff we make up- none of it's really true. But yeah, I fall in love quickly, and I've even fallen in love on sight a few times. But when I fall out of love with someone, it doesn't really change how I feel. I wouldn't need someone to commit their lives to me, but one reason I don't chase after women to "get" them, is that it seems futile. It takes months for anything real to happen. Unless both people enter the relationship with faith that it is real, and then it lasts for some time. So I no longer give my heart away so quickly, in an effort to "get" her, or "make her mine" because I know she'll probably be fickle, and end up breaking up with me. All in all, it's just not my biggest concern right now; but since I am such a romantic, and I would love it so much, I keep thinking about it and I like to. And I make plans for how my life would be, lol.

[white camellia]

I guessed I was in love, because I was happier when I had been not.


:lol: Even adults have puppy love and hormones. :D
How came that, Virgil?

[RoCKiTcZa]

Rockit, that was an amazing post. :lol: :lol: How do you even remember all that?

Of course I still do; I've memorized every single detail in my complicated love life. I reckon I can still enumerate the names of my crushes from one to umpteen, if doing so wouldn't make me feel so bad. But it does, so I try to forget. However, I don't easily forget bad experiences. In fact, I still have some of the guy's messages in my old phone's inbox. When I fell in love with my best friend in sixth grade (after the peak of my fight with the high-school guy) we almost got together, yet he had someone else and whenever I got the courage to ask he could only answer "possibly." We hardly even talk to each other anymore. :( I'm still young, though, so I guess I should just focus on my studies and forget about love until the "right time" comes...

[cactus]

Of course I still do; I've memorized every single detail in my complicated love life. I reckon I can still enumerate the names of my crushes from one to umpteen, if doing so wouldn't make me feel so bad. But it does, so I try to forget. However, I don't easily forget bad experiences. In fact, I still have some of the guy's messages in my old phone's inbox. When I fell in love with my best friend in sixth grade (after the peak of my fight with the high-school guy) we almost got together, yet he had someone else and whenever I got the courage to ask he could only answer "possibly." We hardly even talk to each other anymore. :( I'm still young, though, so I guess I should just focus on my studies and forget about love until the "right time" comes...

I find your love stories very sweet... I am sorry if thinking about it makes you sad... though I dare say in a few years time, when you are a lot older you would look at these memories with fondness than pain.... I am hoping anyway....




Anyway, I'd say hormonal and puppy love is as good as adult-love. There's no reason it should be "worse"- whatever that means- uninvestigated, misunderstood, unsubstantial- because kids can have more insight into these things than adults. Kids can be more mature. Nothing wrong with first loves- isn't the goal of a love life to have a partner and to love them and be happy, and very importantly, to grow? If I'd had a lover as a child or adolescent, I mean a true one who really loved me and were with them for years, that'd have been wonderful for me; as I would love to have that now. No reason two people couldn't grow up together, that they have to be fickle like they usually are.

The reason I have the tendency to fall in love so fast, or perhaps to idealize people, is- because I'm from a broken home? My dad always warned me it would be like this, and he warned me it's unhealthy to be so dependent on one person- especially when you haven't established a mutual attachment. I know I've missed out on a ton because I've never had more than just the one girlfriend; but I'm not worried about my relationship skills in the least, I think those are superb. I'm currently actually in love with a woman who's engaged. Sort of fell in love with her on sight, and I've known her for two or three years. Never tried to break up her and her boyfriend, or, that is, get her interested in me in a romantic way. Seems like a miserable thing to do, completely miserable. In fact in any relationship I would really not want to be possessive. Attachment comes so naturally to me; it needs no encouragement. This way I've got a warm relationship with her. I care for her and love her sincerely and I don't care that we're "only friends," I mean, I just don't think like that. I just think, "Oh, here is this person I love, that makes me feel happy;" I really can't explain it very well, I'm just not influenced by my feelings for her to act on them in a way other than friendship. It's all just stuff we make up- none of it's really true. But yeah, I fall in love quickly, and I've even fallen in love on sight a few times. But when I fall out of love with someone, it doesn't really change how I feel. I wouldn't need someone to commit their lives to me, but one reason I don't chase after women to "get" them, is that it seems futile. It takes months for anything real to happen. Unless both people enter the relationship with faith that it is real, and then it lasts for some time. So I no longer give my heart away so quickly, in an effort to "get" her, or "make her mine" because I know she'll probably be fickle, and end up breaking up with me. All in all, it's just not my biggest concern right now; but since I am such a romantic, and I would love it so much, I keep thinking about it and I like to. And I make plans for how my life would be, lol.

I find your love experiences and views (about love) interesting. I think there is a lot to learn from your attitude in love.... if we could all be like you, we would happier for sure.

[Gadget Girl]

I only have three crushes in my whole life. That was from 4th grade to high school. I never really took them seriously, it were just admiration. Those guys were really cute and handsome, nice, gentlemen, the things that you look for in a guy. They were so nice to me, in fact, I'm the only girl they were taking seriously because in school, I'm kind of a 'serious' type of person, so they are respecting me than the other girls who flirted with them and talked to them like there's tomorrow.

When I was five years old - yeah, you heard right, FIVE years old - my older cousins were pairing me up with a much older boy than me (I think he was 10 or thirteen). He was my neighbor and everytime I see his face, I turned very red and will run to my aunt, searching for a place to hide. I was only five, but I was so shy to face him. He's not my crush, actually. I was so young that time, I don't know what love truly means, or what a crush means. My cousins put the idea in my mind that I had a crush on him, so maybe it planted in my head. Everytime he sees me, he always smiles and I will smile back, then I will run again to my aunt. I dunno, it was only a friendly love I think. Oh well. Eventually, he vanished and and I've never seen him again. Much to my relief. I can't think of seeing him the way I see him before. It's hard to explain, but that's that. I wonder what will happen if for those very long years ago, will he still know me and will I still know him?

[ahsiam]

I have never been successful in love. For several times, I have loved... people both deserving and undeserving of my admiration... nearly twenty of them, if I am right. I can hardly remember. It all began when I was six, a student in kindergarten class, when I had a crush on a boy so nice and cuddly, with prickly hair which I believed looked nice and felt somewhat good to touch. I announced to everyone that I liked the poor kid, and it troubled him so much he cried every time I approached him. To me it was a game, yet I never knew I'd be threatening boys for the rest of my life. Only four years later did I realize that I never felt seriously for him then. I was in fourth grade, and by that time I was already halfway through my puberty stage (based on my own body clock, which, I believe, had gone too fast) that my appearance was already like that of a high-schooler. My best friend looked the same, and because of that, we were the two biggest girls in the class. We both started out Grade 4 having the same crush, however it was just too bad that the guy fancied her while I was only his second choice. Finally I tired of him and switched to a boy who, according to some overly-cheeky girls (one being my best friend in kindergarten who once urged me to give my kindergarten crush a peck on the cheek), had a crush on me. To cut a long story short, let's just say I became obsessed. Come Valentine's Day some of my friends dared me to give him a card, and in a sudden boost of hormone levels, I did as they said. Unfortunately it did not turn out as I'd expected, and he returned the card to me, crumpled up and with marker ink all over. I threw it right away. One year passed, and my "love life" was quiet. In fifth grade came the day I blurted out to a guy I liked that I had a crush on him, which he accepted, yet after that his interests turned to someone else. During that same year, I had a crush on a tiny boy who hadn't even passed his own puberty stage, which was queer; but because love sees no limits, it pushed through, and in fact, it even went as far as a letter which I wrote to him to explain why I was so obsessed, and his reply began with: "To Secret Admirer." That was my first, and only, love life success. I lost my feelings for him, however, when I stepped up to Grade 6, and had a crush on a high school guy this time, a former member of the choir I was then a member of, and a good friend of mine as well. It started when I began to text him, thinking he'd reply because he was my friend, yet I was wrong. He thought I was flirting with him and didn't take it too nicely. Instead, he told me to shut up and look for another guy as he already loved someone else, that I was the most irritating girl he'd ever met, and many other insulting things, and pretty soon we were cold-warring. In fact, we are up to now. That was my toughest experience with love that almost taught me never to love again. But I held on, seeing as I didn't want to give up on love just yet.

Now that I'm in high school, I have a crush on this certain guy whom I find a bit hard to describe. To tell the truth, he is my fourth high-school crush, however the most serious one, to my belief. Smart he may be, seeing as he can complete a Rubik's cube in an estimated time of 10 seconds, and also because he is trilingual, being able to speak English, Filipino and Spanish very fluently, and simply because he is a country boy yet was able to enter the country's "best" high school, our national science high school. I also believed he was handsome (if not for the zits... ahh poor him), but no one shared my insights in that. I was in good terms with him until he became suspicious and finally found out, and in fact he was my partner in Computer Science for a quarter of a term; if only I did not insist to go to a vacant computer to complete my work, which only tempted me to become overly obsessed and flood my Impress Presentation with pictures of him. The geekiest kid, and also the biggest-mouthed guy in class, saw it, and immediately announced it to the entire class. People immediately reacted to it and said I was obsessed. Now, he won't even talk to me. This has been going on for weeks and weeks already, and since then I've been very sad. I've been trying to get over him but for some reason I just can't. *Sigh* How I wish my Planet Love weren't as stormy a place as no one wants to dwell in it... then maybe it wouldn't appear so hopeless...

that was funny and amazing.
i am feeling sorry to hear that you are not with him.:(

[scarlet pain]

I've been in love and heart-broken more than a couple times. I was a quick learner, however, and realized it was not as big a deal as I thought at first. I guess it hurts more than it should hurt. I seemed to be undesirable, even though nobody made fun of me for it or anything. So I ended up never having a girlfriend in highschool, except for one girl who lived an hour from me who I went out with for 3 weeks, until she broke up with me Christmas night, just when I'd gotten her a necklace. Sh*tty! But, there've been some other semi-successes. One girl I knew when I was 15 or 16 I was in love with. The first time I met her was when I was with two or three friends and members in my band; we'd just left someone's house and my friend Neil suggested we stop by her place. Anyway, it turned out kind of good, we just watched a movie, and she had some friends over too...didn't get to know them then, but later spent more time with her and there and sort of fell in love. I mean I was definitely in love, although...well, it seems a little strange. It was one of those for-no-reason types of things. Anyway, at one point she wanted to be with me, but I messed it up on the spot, and we were never together. One of her close friends, I also had a huge crush on, but I never got very close to. There ended up being a very interesting link of friends. A couple of my friends were a lot closer to that group of girls, guess that was my connection to them.

Anyway, I'd say hormonal and puppy love is as good as adult-love. There's no reason it should be "worse"- whatever that means- uninvestigated, misunderstood, unsubstantial- because kids can have more insight into these things than adults. Kids can be more mature. Nothing wrong with first loves- isn't the goal of a love life to have a partner and to love them and be happy, and very importantly, to grow? If I'd had a lover as a child or adolescent, I mean a true one who really loved me and were with them for years, that'd have been wonderful for me; as I would love to have that now. No reason two people couldn't grow up together, that they have to be fickle like they usually are.

The reason I have the tendency to fall in love so fast, or perhaps to idealize people, is- because I'm from a broken home? My dad always warned me it would be like this, and he warned me it's unhealthy to be so dependent on one person- especially when you haven't established a mutual attachment. I know I've missed out on a ton because I've never had more than just the one girlfriend; but I'm not worried about my relationship skills in the least, I think those are superb. I'm currently actually in love with a woman who's engaged. Sort of fell in love with her on sight, and I've known her for two or three years. Never tried to break up her and her boyfriend, or, that is, get her interested in me in a romantic way. Seems like a miserable thing to do, completely miserable. In fact in any relationship I would really not want to be possessive. Attachment comes so naturally to me; it needs no encouragement. This way I've got a warm relationship with her. I care for her and love her sincerely and I don't care that we're "only friends," I mean, I just don't think like that. I just think, "Oh, here is this person I love, that makes me feel happy;" I really can't explain it very well, I'm just not influenced by my feelings for her to act on them in a way other than friendship. It's all just stuff we make up- none of it's really true. But yeah, I fall in love quickly, and I've even fallen in love on sight a few times. But when I fall out of love with someone, it doesn't really change how I feel. I wouldn't need someone to commit their lives to me, but one reason I don't chase after women to "get" them, is that it seems futile. It takes months for anything real to happen. Unless both people enter the relationship with faith that it is real, and then it lasts for some time. So I no longer give my heart away so quickly, in an effort to "get" her, or "make her mine" because I know she'll probably be fickle, and end up breaking up with me. All in all, it's just not my biggest concern right now; but since I am such a romantic, and I would love it so much, I keep thinking about it and I like to. And I make plans for how my life would be, lol.

nikolai you seem like such a nice and sensetive guy!
i'm not from a broken family yet i'm crazy about love,its heavenly and serene to me!
i'm really sorry your girlfriend turned you down on christmas day!
i find your views interesting and i heartily hope you get a true love and remain happy.....................:)

[ahsiam]

I've been in love and heart-broken more than a couple times. I was a quick learner, however, and realized it was not as big a deal as I thought at first. I guess it hurts more than it should hurt. I seemed to be undesirable, even though nobody made fun of me for it or anything. So I ended up never having a girlfriend in highschool, except for one girl who lived an hour from me who I went out with for 3 weeks, until she broke up with me Christmas night, just when I'd gotten her a necklace. Sh*tty! But, there've been some other semi-successes. One girl I knew when I was 15 or 16 I was in love with. The first time I met her was when I was with two or three friends and members in my band; we'd just left someone's house and my friend Neil suggested we stop by her place. Anyway, it turned out kind of good, we just watched a movie, and she had some friends over too...didn't get to know them then, but later spent more time with her and there and sort of fell in love. I mean I was definitely in love, although...well, it seems a little strange. It was one of those for-no-reason types of things. Anyway, at one point she wanted to be with me, but I messed it up on the spot, and we were never together. One of her close friends, I also had a huge crush on, but I never got very close to. There ended up being a very interesting link of friends. A couple of my friends were a lot closer to that group of girls, guess that was my connection to them.

Anyway, I'd say hormonal and puppy love is as good as adult-love. There's no reason it should be "worse"- whatever that means- uninvestigated, misunderstood, unsubstantial- because kids can have more insight into these things than adults. Kids can be more mature. Nothing wrong with first loves- isn't the goal of a love life to have a partner and to love them and be happy, and very importantly, to grow? If I'd had a lover as a child or adolescent, I mean a true one who really loved me and were with them for years, that'd have been wonderful for me; as I would love to have that now. No reason two people couldn't grow up together, that they have to be fickle like they usually are.

The reason I have the tendency to fall in love so fast, or perhaps to idealize people, is- because I'm from a broken home? My dad always warned me it would be like this, and he warned me it's unhealthy to be so dependent on one person- especially when you haven't established a mutual attachment. I know I've missed out on a ton because I've never had more than just the one girlfriend; but I'm not worried about my relationship skills in the least, I think those are superb. I'm currently actually in love with a woman who's engaged. Sort of fell in love with her on sight, and I've known her for two or three years. Never tried to break up her and her boyfriend, or, that is, get her interested in me in a romantic way. Seems like a miserable thing to do, completely miserable. In fact in any relationship I would really not want to be possessive. Attachment comes so naturally to me; it needs no encouragement. This way I've got a warm relationship with her. I care for her and love her sincerely and I don't care that we're "only friends," I mean, I just don't think like that. I just think, "Oh, here is this person I love, that makes me feel happy;" I really can't explain it very well, I'm just not influenced by my feelings for her to act on them in a way other than friendship. It's all just stuff we make up- none of it's really true. But yeah, I fall in love quickly, and I've even fallen in love on sight a few times. But when I fall out of love with someone, it doesn't really change how I feel. I wouldn't need someone to commit their lives to me, but one reason I don't chase after women to "get" them, is that it seems futile. It takes months for anything real to happen. Unless both people enter the relationship with faith that it is real, and then it lasts for some time. So I no longer give my heart away so quickly, in an effort to "get" her, or "make her mine" because I know she'll probably be fickle, and end up breaking up with me. All in all, it's just not my biggest concern right now; but since I am such a romantic, and I would love it so much, I keep thinking about it and I like to. And I make plans for how my life would be, lol.

i just want to tell you that you are a great guy.

[NikolaiI]

I find your love experiences and views (about love) interesting. I think there is a lot to learn from your attitude in love.... if we could all be like you, we would happier for sure.


nikolai you seem like such a nice and sensetive guy!
i'm not from a broken family yet i'm crazy about love,its heavenly and serene to me!
i'm really sorry your girlfriend turned you down on christmas day!
i find your views interesting and i heartily hope you get a true love and remain happy.....................:)


i just want to tell you that you are a great guy.

Thank you all, very much!! You're all so kind. Best wishes to all of you. :yawnb:

[scarlet pain]

i think everyones enjoying:D

[Lyn]

Would you move hundreds of miles away from your family, and a lovely place you've always wanted to live in, to be with the one you love?

[Pensive]

Would you move hundreds of miles away from your family, and a lovely place you've always wanted to live in, to be with the one you love?

You might like to visit this thread (http://www.online-literature.com/forums/showthread.php?t=29340).

[kilted exile]

The first girl I ever loved was called Jane. I was about 5 1/2 and smitten, she had this mousy blonde hair and green eyes. I made her this fancy valentines card out of construction paper, macaroni, pipe-cleaners & glitter - then of course being the clumsy idiot I was/am I spilt my entire glass of Ribena (grape flavoured dilutable juice, for those unfamiliar with it). Of course the card was soaked and it now had a kind of psychedelic tie-dye look to it with dark red blotches on it.

Now some people would have made a new card instead, but I have always been kinda lazy so on the inside instead of some rhyme I wrote/scrawled "sorry the card is wet, I spilt my ribena on it" . I then gave it to her the next day at school. The teacher & her parents found this to be wonderfully cute, and after lunch she returned with a card for me (which I still have to this day actually). We spent the next week sitting together at playtimes - until I ruined things by throwing a worm in her hair :lol:


Would you move hundreds of miles away from your family, and a lovely place you've always wanted to live in, to be with the one you love?

I think I would have to be pretty damn sure I really loved the person. However, it is all about taking chances & not living with regrets - despite what they may tell you, going home again is definitely possible.

[Lyn]

thanks pensive. From reading that I guess my answer (to myself) is yes, given the things I identified with there. I've still got problems with the concept of promising to do something in a year's time though. Who knows what will happen? I always, always keep my word so if I promise somthing, that means I've gotta do it. Unfortunately it means relying on the other concerned party to do the same...

Kilted Exile, I can always rely on a fellow scot for good advice. The place I'm moving to (away from my partner due to ridiculous unforseen circumstances) is in Scotland (my home) and totally lovely. I've always wanted to go back, but now I'm thinking bout promising to leave there (again). Far too complicated. I like thinking that I can always go home again, nothing being forever. I also like taking risks!

[RoCKiTcZa]

that was funny and amazing.
i am feeling sorry to hear that you are not with him.:(

Awww... that's all right. I'm starting to accept that we were never meant to be, though for some reason I always come up with reasons to keep on loving him, even though I know he will never love me back. In fact, it came out in a recent survey made by my friends that I was the girl whom he hated the most. I hate him back, really--and bitterly, but his memory is something I simply can't cast away...

[Mortis Anarchy]

Are you in love with someone?
how did you meet the first time? what happened actually?
love at first sight (flickering of eyes, ;) ) or love at first chat........?
or was it first a friend then a "friend"? :p
are you having any problem? share it. we all can help you solve it out.
or are looking for a love? tell us about the dream boy/girl.....
please share your experiences.

edit: I am sorry the caption says "you" when its supposed to be "your". (typo)

I have this good friend that I kinda had more than just friends type feelings...but I told him that I didn't want to date. (My friend told him I liked him...so if it wasn't for her this mess would not exist, I'm kinda bitter). Anyways, I gave it a shot after feeling some peer pressure(which is bad!) and I decided to call it quits. I made him cry...not in front of me and I wasn't mean, but my friend said he cried. I'm under a lot of pressure with school and my parents that I just didn't want any committments, especially since I'm going away for school soon. So we talked and he said that he still wanted to be friends, which I do as well. But then he became the rudest and cruel person ever. Now I really resent him and I don't want to talk to him. He offended me and was mean to me in front of my own mother. He apologized 3 times and after each time he did it again. I told him that if he wanted some time before we hung out, that was fine, because I know I hurt him and made him angry, but I had to do what was best for me. Ugh, I'm just happier being single. No stress, no committments, no pressure, nothing. Plus he was really, really clingy. I'm a rather independent person, so it is really annoying when a person wants to spend ever second from morning to night with you. I'm too young to be married! Sorry, I just dropped this...I feel much better now! Oh, and I don't believe in love...or at least not now.

[ahsiam]

I have this good friend that I kinda had more than just friends type feelings...but I told him that I didn't want to date. (My friend told him I liked him...so if it wasn't for her this mess would not exist, I'm kinda bitter). Anyways, I gave it a shot after feeling some peer pressure(which is bad!) and I decided to call it quits. I made him cry...not in front of me and I wasn't mean, but my friend said he cried. I'm under a lot of pressure with school and my parents that I just didn't want any committments, especially since I'm going away for school soon. So we talked and he said that he still wanted to be friends, which I do as well. But then he became the rudest and cruel person ever. Now I really resent him and I don't want to talk to him. He offended me and was mean to me in front of my own mother. He apologized 3 times and after each time he did it again. I told him that if he wanted some time before we hung out, that was fine, because I know I hurt him and made him angry, but I had to do what was best for me. Ugh, I'm just happier being single. No stress, no committments, no pressure, nothing. Plus he was really, really clingy. I'm a rather independent person, so it is really annoying when a person wants to spend ever second from morning to night with you. I'm too young to be married! Sorry, I just dropped this...I feel much better now! Oh, and I don't believe in love...or at least not now.

well....sometimes its hard for a commitment,but i see no fault in you or him. He just wanted a serious relationship while you wanted to be more like a friend! So i think its okay,but dont yet loose faith in love cause you never know,its one of the strongest thing ever!

[NikolaiI]

'love is a rose but you'd better not pick it,
it only grows when it's on the vine.
handful of thorns and you know you've missed it,
for love disappears when you say the word "mine"'
-some song or other..

[ahsiam]

'love is a rose but you'd better not pick it,
it only grows when it's on the vine.
handful of thorns and you know you've missed it,
for love disappears when you say the word "mine"'
-some song or other..

nice song nikolaiI or other.:)

[ahsiam]

This was a thread started by me four years back. I didn't fall in love then. But I was very excited to read everyone's experience. So i will request everyone to share it again.And now i can share mine. Four years back I met a guy in a chatroom. His nick was 'One last breathe' as it was my favourite song den, i talked to him and started continuing chating on msn. Later we started talking on phone and we met a couple of times. I liked him very much. And when he proposed me to be his girlfriend last year, I understood that he liked me too. Slowly we realized that we fell in love with each other. We share everything and that increases our strength. We hope to marry some day.

[symphony]

Happy one year, ahsiam :)
I used to not believe in finding love like that, in a chatroom or in phone conversations... But I guess, there's no saying where and how you find love.
"Back row to the left
a little to the side
slightly out of place,
look beyond the light,
where you'd least expect
there's someone special."
Love this song from Poets of the Fall. :)

[Delta40]

I have always loved from a distance.

[Helga]

I have never been really in love. I cared about my ex but I didn't love him. I think the closest I have been to loving someone was a guy I adored and dated for a short time but broke it off cause of a drug issue he had, but he was always the one I thought about. when I was with my ex I wondered that if I met him again everything would be good and I would be happy. He died so I think I idealize him more because of that as someone I felt love for.

I have had about a hundred crushes though.

[JuniperWoolf]

I have always loved from a distance.

That's called "stalking," you know. ;)

[Basil]

I have always loved from a distance.

That's called "stalking," you know. ;)

It all depends on the distance involved. 1000 miles away, and you're pining for the object of your affection. But for whatever reason, you aren't allowed to pine for someone if you're outside their bedroom window at three in the morning. The law is funny like that.

I have a love story which might hold some mild interest for some since it happened right here at Litnet. Plus, it involves some low-level stalking.

There have always been people posting here at the forum whose posts have always held great interest for me. As a general rule, this interest is usually sparked by the fact I find their posts to be ridiculous, and I take no small amount of pleasure in reading their posts and having that opinion confirmed over and over again. And then, there is a much smaller subset of people whose posts I read because I genuinely enjoy them: they are highly intelligent, witty, or just damned good writers. Did I mention this is a much smaller group than the first?

When I first became aware of Idril's posts here on the forum, it wasn't necessarily her intelligence or sense of humor that caught my eye; the most striking feature was just how effortlessly these traits were expressed in her writing. Her personality just jumped off the screen, and I was fascinated by it. I read pretty much everything she posted on the forum for a good year, even wandering into threads I had studiously avoided, like "What are you eating right now?" (it was there I learned of her undying love of Coca-Cola). I noted that we had many common musical interests. We seemed to like the same movies. I even read several novels that she had enthusiastically recommended to others: The Tin Drum and The Master and Margarita, both of which I liked very much. But more than anything, I just enjoyed reading her posts, because they were so well written, and she seemed like such a warm, kind soul. I pretty much became Idril's number one fan here at the Literature Network.

Only she didn't know that, because I never made an attempt to contact her.

Sure, Idril and I had a few exchanges here and there, usually in the game threads; we had teased each other a bit, joked around some, but that was about it. I just wasn't really sure how to send a "hi, I think you're awesome!" PM to someone. And to what end? People forming relationships online seemed strange to me (hey, I was still getting accustomed to the internet in 2007). Not to mention I wasn't entirely sure how she felt about me. Whereas Idril was open and accessible in her posts, I had always been guarded and reserved; when posting, I went to great lengths to hide who I was and what I truly felt. And I only posted once in a blue moon. Because of this, I always suspected that the general forum population regarded me as somewhat creepy, a forum oddity who was best left alone. Being thought of as such pleased me to no end generally, but it complicated matters when I wanted to present myself to someone as a reasonably normal and not scary human being.

I left the forum for a spell; the reasons why aren't particularly relevant to this story. When I eventually returned, Idril was still posting here, albeit less frequently. Soon after, however, she stopped posting altogether. I had no idea why. Of course, people quit the forum all the time, real life concerns get in the way of our time online, but I was slightly saddened that I had never made any sort of overture to this person of whom I thought so highly. One day, about seven months after her departure, it occurred to me that Idril might return to the forum one day, and when she did, she should have something here to welcome her back, something to let her know that people (me) had been aware of her absence. So for the very first time, I sent her a PM, reprinted here in its entirety:

Idril,

You are missed.

Basil

I figured one day, far in the future, Idril would chance upon Litnet again, find this lone PM sitting in her dusty, unused inbox, and just maybe it would brighten her day. In a way, it seemed like a parting gesture, the last word on our never-quite-developed friendship.

Did you know that there is an option that allows forum users to be notified by email whenever they receive a PM here at the forum? I certainly never knew that. And so I was completely caught off guard when I received a response from Idril the very next day.

She said it was nice to hear from me, and that she missed our exchanges about music. And, well, that was pretty much it.

I didn't even know if I should respond. What if she had sent me a reply just to be polite? What if her next message was less perfunctory and more "please leave me alone, you're scaring me"?

Guess what? I did respond. As did Idril. And thus our correspondence was born. That was exactly one year and one week ago from today.

I won't go into all the details as to how our correspondence blossomed into a courtship. It was gradual, it was flirty, it was fun. And it's ongoing: we met in person for the first time last month in Minneapolis. I'll be visiting again in just a few weeks, as well as during the holidays. We're crazy in love with each other.

The most amazing aspect of all this is not that two people could meet online at a literature forum and fall in love with each other, but that two people could meet online at a literature forum, fall in love...and they both turn out to be incredibly attractive. What are the odds?

[Idril]

I won't go into all the details as to how our correspondence blossomed into a courtship. It was gradual, it was flirty, it was fun.

Gradual?! It was downright painfully slow sometimes. There was a period there of agonizing vagueness and obtuseness that was both endearing and frustrating but I guess it all worked itself out in the end. ;)


The most amazing aspect of all this is not that two people could meet online at a literature forum and fall in love with each other, but that two people could meet online at a literature forum, fall in love...and they both turn out to be incredibly attractive. What are the odds?

That's one thing I love about you Dear, your incredible modesty. :p

[Scheherazade]

First Niamh and Kilted... And now Idril and Basil...

Good luck and all the best!

[Idril]

Who needs e-harmony when there's litnet? :lol: Thank you for your well wishes, Scher. :)

[Basil]

Thank you, Scher, your kind words are very much appreciated. :)

I posted our story because I thought people might be interested in how Idril and I came to be an item, but I'm also hoping that at least one hopeless forum dweeb follows my example and decides to contact the girl he secretly fancies. I'm not saying I hope he succeeds, I just think it would be funny if the ladies of litnet suddenly starting getting pestered by all the dorky guys here.

[Idril]

I'm not saying I hope he succeeds, I just think it would be funny if the ladies of litnet suddenly starting getting pestered by all the dorky guys here.

I'm sure they'll appreciate that. ;)

[Basil]

What can I say? I'm a born romantic. ;)

[Taliesin]

I leave this forum just for a couple of measly years and then stuff like this happens. I, frankly, am at a loss of words.

[Basil]

You're not the only one, Tal. Apparently the whole forum has been stunned into silence by this revelation.