The Obsession

[manny2]

I sit and think
I think about you
the things you do
how you pretend and lie
just are so fake

you make me envy
envy what you have
and what you had

The one good thing you had
you threw away
and it came to me
now your back
just to take it from me
thats all I ponder about
thats all I think

I think your out to get me
but it is I who makes it that way
for you have done nothing to me
showed no interest in me
or the what it is that i have
but all I can do

Sit and think
that your out to get me
and what I have

I go out of my way
just to make sure you cant
take that thing that I have
which I convinced myself you want
and that your out to get me
but the thing i have is not just a thing
it is a person, a friend
rather the most important person to me

I think you want him back
but he is not yours to take
I sit and obsess
wait for you to do so
but it will not happen
for he is mine
and not yours to take

[RPMI]

Wow that has this amazing effect, it makes me read through the lines really fast... I don't know if you intended for that to happen or wheather it is just me but that is pretty cool. I like your poem, its good.

[manny2]

Are you one to stop me from going somwhere
doing what I have to do
this is my life, I should control it
not you
no matter if you get me places
this is my life, i do as i do
maybe you got hurt
and need to be fixed
but it is not I who hurt you
why do you blame me
for the ones that run into you
blame the guy behind you
who really hurt you
because it was not I
I would take better care of you

oh my poor car
it has been hit
and wont take me places
what am I to do
a car should not control what I do
this is my life
why is my car stopping me
from doing what I usually do

are we so dependent on our cars
that we are unable to go on with life
without one for a week or two
oh my poor car
what am I to do
for it will not take me places
not now nor anytime soon

[Niamh]

I've merged the two together in one thread. Because this is a busy part of the forum there is a limit of one thread per day(see the please read sticky notice at top of forum). But if you create a single thread for all your poems you can post as many as you wont a day.:)

[manny2]

thanks RPMI, dont really no what affect i was going for honestly, i was just writing : )

[AuntShecky]

If you don't mind a suggestion, your pieces could use a bit more specificity-- tell us the "things" the subject of your piece actually does. The more images, sounds, real-life allusions you can add to your work the more it breathes.

[manny2]

thanks for the suggestion! but for "the obsession" the whole point of saying thing so many times is because you dont find out tell the end, if you notice i change "thing" into person :) , thanks for the help, i changed some of the lines earlier on!