The Immortal Enemy

[Xillus_Xavier]

The Immortal Enemy

These bloodless hands at which I stare,
have killed the silence in the air.
With pick to string and rapid thumb,
I struck him down with sinful strum.

But silence showed no flee or fight,
no mercy plea nor cry of fright.
He met his end without concern,
and vowed to me "I shall return".

And so he did, when I succumbed;
with songs complete, and fingers numbed.
I used my sword of chord to sin,
but silence - just came back again.

[symphony]

this one's in tetrameter, isnt it? sounded very nice when i read it out loud. the rhyming didnt sound imposed either. very nice. :thumbs_up

[Pendragon]

I like the way your poems flow. You may be keeping foot and meter, but it doesn't rule you, you have mastered it so the poem comes out sounding natural, instead of stilted, and your rhymes unforced. This is poetic Mastery, to stay within bounds and not be bound. What can I say? It's like perfection!

http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l108/AbsalomKane/Smilies/Appaluse.gif

[dibyendra]

My poem similar to yours written few months ago.

The Beauty of silence on that night

Complete darkness outside now,
shower of rain and light wind making a pleasant sound,
continuous croaking of the frogs and barking of the dogs I hear,
I can feel the natural sound of silence peacefully...
Lights turned off and windows partially opened,
lying in the bed with my eyes opened,
gazing on the penetrated dim light of street-lights...

Slowly and secretly, night it falls deep and silence it grows.
Maybe all the houses might have fallen asleep by now
but I'm wondering how to pass this lonely night...
Then silence it creeps beside me as a companion.
I murmur on it not to break this peaceful silence.
I pour feelings under the breath and silence kindly listens to me.

Slowly and silently, speechless I become,
unconsciously, I become a spectator of this silence,
comfortably feeling the beauty on it and lost in it.
Silence makes a plea to the night for an easy sleep
but now, it's too late to sleep and too early to wake up.
Soon the break of the dawn steals darkness
and takes silence along with it...

- Dibyendra Hyoju
Saturday, July 28, 2007