Remembrances recalled

[dibyendra]

Those remembrances recalled,
I embraced once again
to the glimpses of yours
with heart full of pain.
I got lost in the alleys of dream
where your hallucinatory reflections
startlingly opened my eyes with tears.

I remember every single moments my love...

Your crystalline eyes,
they were sparkling vibrantly,
drawn my eyes toward your appealing beauty.
Innocent smile of yours
allured in front of you.
An undeniable fact.

Those frigid mornings - defrosted,
cold days without the sun - warmed,
and my lonesome nature - accompanied,
when figure of yours impressed into my heart.
Longing for conversation - fulfilled.
and my yearning for your love - amplified.

Our relation,
it flourished with the time,
with no stains it shined,
was clear as a blue sky.
Like free birds, we flew very high
and honestly sanguine that our love could never die.

Mysteriously,
dark clouds scattered around the clear blue sky
which rained with thunder and lightning.
Still, we patiently endeavored to fly
but lost our directions and we fell apart.
But I couldn't stop you run away
although I cried "Stay".
Traces of your footsteps,
they were all washed away.
I couldn't follow my dear,
I've been a loser anyway.
Still, I searched you everywhere...
but you are nowhere to be found.
I screamed your name many times in agony,
wishing if you could hear my jading sound.

Later I came to know
that you were never mine...
You had already shined on someone's else life.


Please drop your comments and suggestions after reading this poem. Your comments will be highly appreciated.
Thank you !
Dibyendra

[Pendragon]

You're grown much as a poet, mon ami. One one line I would change and it is only because the noun and verb are reversed. This line: drawn my eyes toward your appealing beauty should go like this my eyes drawn toward your appealing beauty. Nothing big, it just reads easier that way. You are coming along fine as a poet. But I never had any doubt about you at any time!

http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l108/AbsalomKane/Four/yoda.gif

[dibyendra]

You're grown much as a poet, mon ami. One one line I would change and it is only because the noun and verb are reversed. This line: drawn my eyes toward your appealing beauty should go like this my eyes drawn toward your appealing beauty. Nothing big, it just reads easier that way. You are coming along fine as a poet. But I never had any doubt about you at any time!


Thank you so much Pen for giving your opinion about this poem and suggesting me regarding the change that is needed in this poem. I'm very happy to hear that I'm improving and coming out as a poet. It's all because you've have been a teacher for me all along the way. I'm very much grateful for that Pen.

[CdnReader]

I especially liked these three lines, Dibyendra. Nice! :)



Those frigid mornings - defrosted,
cold days without the sun - warmed,
and my lonesome nature - accompanied,

[Pendragon]

Thank you so much Pen for giving your opinion about this poem and suggesting me regarding the change that is needed in this poem. I'm very happy to hear that I'm improving and coming out as a poet. It's all because you've have been a teacher for me all along the way. I'm very much grateful for that Pen.
You're too kind, Dibby. You had the talent. One cannot teach talent. One can teach how a poem sets up and how to rhyme, etc. But talent comes from the heart of the person. You have always shown that in your poems. I have yet to run into a person on this forum that I despair of their talent. I have learned a lot myself, from somethimes the very ones asking me for advice. No expert am I, a fellow student of poetry, glad to have friends of like mind. Take care, mon ami.

Pen

http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l108/AbsalomKane/Four/yoda.gif

[dibyendra]

You're too kind, Dibby. You had the talent. One cannot teach talent. One can teach how a poem sets up and how to rhyme, etc. But talent comes from the heart of the person. You have always shown that in your poems. I have yet to run into a person on this forum that I despair of their talent. I have learned a lot myself, from somethimes the very ones asking me for advice. No expert am I, a fellow student of poetry, glad to have friends of like mind. Take care, mon ami.

Pen


Oh Pen, you are such a nice person. I'm very much overwhelmed by your delightful reply !



One cannot teach talent. One can teach how a poem sets up and how to rhyme, etc. But talent comes from the heart of the person.

Yes, I agree with you Pen regarding on what you have said. Paradigms can be given showing how to beautify the poem but poetry itself cannot be taught. I Emotions comes from the deep of heart and poet should have talent to express them beautifully.

From the beginning, you have always given so many suggestions and hints, and sometimes even edited poems showing how it would be after editing and like that. I'm really grateful for that Pen.



One cannot teach talent. One can teach how a poem sets up and how to rhyme, etc. But talent comes from the heart of the person. You have always shown that in your poems.


Thank you Pen ! You might not know how I am feeling right now....I'm speechless! I'm so glad to hear such kind words from you Pen. I made continuous efforts to write something beautiful which people will really appreciate from their heart and I'm feeling that right now for this poem. I think I've done a pretty fair job after a long time. I'm thankful to you Pen and all those others who have supported me all along the way.

I'm very much inspired to write even more and will definitely try even harder to write when my mood comes someday again.



I have yet to run into a person on this forum that I despair of their talent. I have learned a lot myself, from somethimes the very ones asking me for advice. No expert am I, a fellow student of poetry, glad to have friends of like mind. Take care, mon ami.


You're a proficient poet ! It's so great of you to guide everyone here in this forum. I didn't know that you're a student of poetry. That's so nice to hear about you. It's so good to hear those french words "mon ami" Pen. Take care Pen !

[dibyendra]

Nice! :)

It's so pleasing to hear from you cdn. I'm really glad that you liked this one. I'm really inspired now to write even more cdn. ;)