When We Are Old

[CdnReader]

.

When We Are Old

When we are old,
we will walk in the garden,
amongst the climbing roses with petals reaching.
Together we will sow seeds in narrow furrows,
carefully nurturing the delicate sprouts,
and scatter wildflowers
everywhere.

When we are old,
we will walk by the stream,
your arm around my waist,
my head tilted to your shoulder.
Together we will splash barefoot through the shallows,
then, laughing, collapse onto the porch swing,
and, enveloped in the beauty of stillness,
let the sun's warmth dry us
in silence.

When we are old,
so too will the world slow.
Together we will relinquish this space
and be lifted away upon the north wind,
hand in hand.

And in our next life
I shall love you again.

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cdn/20sep07
.

[dibyendra]

Wow! beautifully presented the days ahead. I'm still young but your poem took me ahead in the future and I was thinking and acting the move that you have presented in this poem. Very nice poem cdn ! You're such a great poet ! :thumbs_up

[Madhuri]

Wow! beautifully presented the days ahead. I'm still young but your poem took me ahead in the future and I was thinking and acting the move that you have presented in this poem. Very nice poem cdn ! You're such a great poet ! :thumbs_up

Me too :D I was thinking that I want all this to happen to me, when I am old :D

[CdnReader]

Thanks very much, you two. It'll be a long time before either of you need to think about being old. :p

[Granny5]

Cdn, I have to show this to Poppy. I love it and I know he will to. It's his birthday today and he needs to read this one. Very sweet and loving.

[CdnReader]

Thanks, Granny. And please do convey my best wishes to Poppy on his special day!! :D

[ampoule]

Very lovely. So many facets to old age and how wonderful for a couple to share it.

[PrinceMyshkin]

.

When We Are Old

When we are old,
we will walk in the garden,
amongst the climbing roses with petals reaching.
Together we will sow seeds in narrow furrows,
carefully nurturing the delicate sprouts,
and scatter wildflowers
everywhere.

When we are old,
we will walk by the stream,
your arm around my waist,
my head tilted to your shoulder.
Together we will splash barefoot through the shallows,
then, laughing, collapse onto the porch swing,
and, enveloped in the beauty of stillness,
let the sun's warmth dry us
in silence.

When we are old,
so too will the world slow.
Together we will relinquish this space
and be lifted away upon the north wind,
hand in hand.

And in our next life
I shall love you again.

.
cdn/20sep07
.

Ha ha! Now you've done it! How are you EVER going to better this?

The lyricism of it, the combination of exotic details - such as the climbing roses along with the more prosaic porch swing - and the seeming spontaneity, are breathtaking! And then the plain humility of those last lines!

[CdnReader]

Very lovely. So many facets to old age and how wonderful for a couple to share it.

Now if only I could someone to be a part of that "couple" with.... LOL! Thanks, Amp. :)


Ha ha! Now you've done it! How are you EVER going to better this?

The lyricism of it, the combination of exotic details - such as the climbing roses along with the more prosaic porch swing - and the seeming spontaneity, are breathtaking! And then the plain humility of those last lines!

Oh, I'm glad you liked this one, Jer. Shall I just hang up my pen now and call it a day? ;)

[littlewing53]

beautfiul cdnR...i loved reading every word unfold...what a dream for all of us..lw

[CdnReader]

Thanks, LW. Much appreciated. :)

[symphony]

.

When We Are Old

When we are old,
we will walk in the garden,
amongst the climbing roses with petals reaching.
Together we will sow seeds in narrow furrows,
carefully nurturing the delicate sprouts,
and scatter wildflowers
everywhere.

When we are old,
we will walk by the stream,
your arm around my waist,
my head tilted to your shoulder.
Together we will splash barefoot through the shallows,
then, laughing, collapse onto the porch swing,
and, enveloped in the beauty of stillness,
let the sun's warmth dry us
in silence.

When we are old,
so too will the world slow.
Together we will relinquish this space
and be lifted away upon the north wind,
hand in hand.

And in our next life
I shall love you again.

.
cdn/20sep07
.

Lovely! :nod:

[CdnReader]

Thanks, Symph! :) Done exams yet?

[symphony]

:bawling: i wish!!
this nightmare will end on the 29th (damn! 29th seems so far now! :( )

[Inkling]

Ohhh - this was just about perfect! Loved the lines:

And in our next life
I shall love you again.

This is a sentiment I use again and again - it's just so amazingly romantic! Check out my poem "In Another Life..." if you get the chance - it's along the same lines...

[CdnReader]

Thanks so much, Ink. (...on my way to read your entry now....)

[Riesa]

Cdn ~ I enjoyed your poem, it was lovely to take in nice and slow. :) On my walk this morning I saw a a smiling gray haired couple heading out of their house for a walk, holding hands, I turned off my iPod and said, good morning! and they beamed at me with pure joy, it seemed. I thought of your poem.

[Virgil]

That is nice. Perhaps this is just a personal preference, but it might sound better without the repetitions, such as I have suggested below:


.

When We Are Old

When we are old,
we will walk in the garden,
amongst the climbing roses with petals reaching.
Together we will sow seeds in narrow furrows,
carefully nurturing the delicate sprouts,
and scatter wildflowers
everywhere.

we will walk by the stream,
your arm around my waist,
my head tilted to your shoulder.
Together we will splash barefoot through the shallows,
then, laughing, collapse onto the porch swing,
and, enveloped in the beauty of stillness,
let the sun's warmth dry us
in silence.

so too will the world slow.
Together we will relinquish this space
and be lifted away upon the north wind,
hand in hand.

And in our next life
I shall love you again.

Note: Above is edited by Virgil

[firefangled]

I cannot say anything better than what has already been said. This is so special, Cdn.

[blazeofglory]

.

When We Are Old

When we are old,
we will walk in the garden,
amongst the climbing roses with petals reaching.
Together we will sow seeds in narrow furrows,
carefully nurturing the delicate sprouts,
and scatter wildflowers
everywhere.

When we are old,
we will walk by the stream,
your arm around my waist,
my head tilted to your shoulder.
Together we will splash barefoot through the shallows,
then, laughing, collapse onto the porch swing,
and, enveloped in the beauty of stillness,
let the sun's warmth dry us
in silence.

When we are old,
so too will the world slow.
Together we will relinquish this space
and be lifted away upon the north wind,
hand in hand.

And in our next life
I shall love you again.

.
cdn/20sep07
.

Indeed this is really a beautiful poem, marvelously presented. Every one aspires to have this kind of moments upon aging, but a few can will be lucky enough to enjoy this type, for this is a poetic domain, not a realistic domain which is in point of fact thorny an spiky.

[CdnReader]

Riesa, I'm honoured that such a meeting should bring my poem to your mind. Thank you! A smile is such a simple thing to give, and it makes people soooo happy. Keep up the good work. :D

Virgil, I like your version too.... Thanks!

Firefangled and BlazeofGlory, thank you very much for your kind words. I appreciate that you took the time to read and leave a comment. :)

[Pendragon]

Lovely poem. Longer than your usual, but resounds with love. Beautiful! http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l108/AbsalomKane/Four/CandidCamera1.gif

[CdnReader]

Many thanks, kind Sir Pendragon. :)