Cats are the LAZIEST animals on Earth!!!

[emily655321]

Well, some others have shockingly and grossly misused the labels of "scary" and "ugly" to describe pictures of cats on the Cute Things (http://online-literature.com/forums/showthread.php?t=16627) thread. As a reasonable person, I can overlook such differences of opinion. However, when such a judgment is passed on the venerable Limecat (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limecat), I feel I must step in. Clearly, my dears, you have never seen a scary cat before. ;)

What follows is intended purely as an educational tool.

[emily655321]

The most effectively scary incarnation of a cat is the "snarling, hairless" variety, pictured here.

http://i2.tinypic.com/sw2zj6.jpg

http://i2.tinypic.com/sw2zw0.jpg

http://i2.tinypic.com/sw303b.jpg

http://i2.tinypic.com/sw30bm.jpg

[emily655321]

Those cats blessed with hair can also be scary, but this is most often achieved by the introduction of aquatic elements. The downside of this is, of course, that wet cats (a surprisingly tame Google search, if you can imagine) tend to be less angry than they are sullen, pushing them dangerously close to the "sad" or even "cute" categories, though they usually just slide comfortably into the "ugly" group.

http://i2.tinypic.com/sw311e.jpg

http://i2.tinypic.com/sw31ah.gif

http://i2.tinypic.com/sw32o4.jpg

http://i2.tinypic.com/sw32w7.jpg

[emily655321]

Other techniques to creating a terrifying specimen include overbreeding your cat until his face threatens to disappear.

http://i2.tinypic.com/sw3381.jpg

http://i2.tinypic.com/sw33g1.jpg

[emily655321]

Or, if you're into torturing your furry friend, overfeeding is another popular method.

http://i2.tinypic.com/sw33nb.jpg

http://i2.tinypic.com/sw33uu.jpg

[emily655321]

You could feed your cat drugs, and see if he turns himself ugly.

http://i2.tinypic.com/sw3490.jpg




Or, you could just shave your cat ugly, though the "sullenness" factor applies here, as in the "water" examples, making "sad" the most likely outcome.

http://i2.tinypic.com/sw35t1.gif

http://i2.tinypic.com/sw361l.jpg

[papayahed]

aww jeez, now those are darn ugly cats. My friend has one of those things and they're even uglier in person. And extremely mean when you do your friend a favor an pick it up from the groomer (I'm not sure extactly what was done but the thing was orney).

[emily655321]

Of course, if you leave it up to the cat himself, he will happily demonstrate the most favored instrument of feline terrorism: psychological intimidation.

http://i2.tinypic.com/sw36oi.jpg

http://i2.tinypic.com/sw36ys.jpg

http://i2.tinypic.com/sw3779.jpg

[emily655321]

If all else fails, you can always just Photoshop yourself a scary cat.

http://i2.tinypic.com/sw37fq.jpg

http://i2.tinypic.com/sw395d.jpg

http://i2.tinypic.com/sw39ds.jpg

http://i2.tinypic.com/sw39m8.jpg

http://i2.tinypic.com/sw39tx.jpg

[emily655321]

Then again, some cats are just born ugly.

http://i2.tinypic.com/sw3a5x.jpg

[kilted exile]

See I wouldnt really classify them as cats (wierd demons from hell would be a closer description) apart from the second one which is quite definetely a rat, I think I met his brother when I was doing a sewer inspection a few months ago.

[emily655321]

I hope you enjoyed my presentation. :D If I come across any more interesting specimens, I will be sure to submit them for your scientific inspection.

[Xamonas Chegwe]

I find that cats tend to look pretty ugly when you scan them to show them on the internet. :D

http://static.flickr.com/1/768275_dd6a441b2c_m.jpg

[Xamonas Chegwe]

Let's see how that's done.

http://images.dpchallenge.com/images_challenge/283/124650.jpg

:lol: :lol:

[RobinHood3000]

See I wouldnt really classify them as cats (wierd demons from hell would be a closer description)
I'm with Kilted on this one.

[Xamonas Chegwe]

And if you haven't seen THIS (http://www.rathergood.com/punk_kittens/) before, you really should - there's dozens more songs on the site as well - I love it when the little one stage-dives about half way through the song. :lol: :lol: :lol:

[jackyyyy]

I hope you enjoyed my presentation. :D If I come across any more interesting specimens, I will be sure to submit them for your scientific inspection.
Geepers, now I can see why dogs hate 'em.

Dose kats be in ma neyburhood???


And if you haven't seen THIS (http://www.rathergood.com/punk_kittens/) before, you really should - there's dozens more songs on the site as well - I love it when the little one stage-dives about half way through the song. :lol: :lol: :lol:
Thanks, I sent the URL to some cat lovers... nice site!

[woeful painter]

sheesh! the more reason I'd hate cats now...yuck! :lol:

[Pensive]

Yuckers, these are probably the ugliest creatures I have ever seen.

Emily, you are to some extent right. That is what ugly monsters look like. I would not call them cats.

[emily655321]

:lol: *rolls on floor in fits of maniacal laughter*

Oh... I'm having way too much fun with this. You guys are great.

Oh, look. I missed one:



http://i2.tinypic.com/swpdmt.jpg

[RobinHood3000]

If ever there were a cross between a sewer rat and a jackal, I imagine that that is what it would look like.

[emily655321]

I found a couple potential avatars for all you cat-haters: :brow:

http://i2.tinypic.com/swpf6t.jpg

http://i2.tinypic.com/swpgjm.jpg

[woeful painter]

Man! Who the heck breeds these infernal carcasses! :lol:

Though I might consider the avatars! :brow:

[emily655321]

Man! Who the heck breeds these infernal carcasses!
:lol: :lol: That just made my day!

[woeful painter]

:lol::lol::lol:
Seriously, imagining one of these sleeps at my bed and everytime I open my eyes for the next day I see the sinister stares of it's bulging eyes, looking like they're about to erupt form its socket, straight back at me...Ohh! *shivers* I'd rather not wake up at all! :lol:

[Taliesin]

Well, at least we have got many possible villains and monsters (http://www.online-literature.com/forums/showpost.php?p=182511&postcount=9) for our DnD campaign. The last one in em's post could be some kind of infernal seductress, like a succubus.
Well, who gives a damn that we mainly planned for politcal intigue. Our game tends to have as much sense ans Forgotten Realms anyway.
Oh, and an eeevil idea of how to end the days of the characters of our players:

Like this! (http://www.online-literature.com/forums/showpost.php?p=182511&postcount=9)

[Nightshade]

Eeeeeeeek!
Well yes some of those were ugly but most were just umm pooor kitties well exept the photoshop ones wich were terrifying !
( I wonnder if the penguins had anything to do with that??)

[Themis]

Some of the cats were really ugly but a few were oddly cute (in an ugly way of course). But I agree with kilted and Robin - there were lots of them that were definitely no cats. At least, not the kind you can see in pet shops or anywhere else in public.

[Stanislaw]

holy @#$% those seriously cannot be cats. :eek2:

they remind me of the hairless gremlins or maybe...some demonic video game character...but not cats...never cats...

[ElizabethSewall]

http://daveshearon.typepad.com/daveshearon/images/ugly_cat_1.jpg
http://badgas.co.uk/animals/cats/ugly-kittens.jpg
http://wired.st-and.ac.uk/~chris/humour/image/bad_cat.jpg

[emily655321]

Hehehe. :D

Good ones, Elizabeth! Those teeth are something else. :cold: The first one is pretty cute, though! I want to nuzzle his little ratty face. :D

[ElizabethSewall]

The first one is pretty cute, though! I want to nuzzle his little ratty face. :D
Yes, I find the woman's hands more scary than the cat is! :cold: :lol:

[woeful painter]

Cripes! Not another batch again! Grrr! *where the hell's my chainsaw when you need it!?*

[emily655321]

( I wonnder if the penguins had anything to do with that??)Well, now that you mention it... I have found evidence of the Penguins' evil influence on feline behavior:

http://i2.tinypic.com/sxysg5.jpg

http://i2.tinypic.com/sxysmr.jpg

http://i2.tinypic.com/sxyt11.jpg

http://i2.tinypic.com/sxyuzd.jpg

http://i2.tinypic.com/sxyv5y.jpg

http://i2.tinypic.com/sxyz2c.jpg

And, last but by no means least evil...

http://i2.tinypic.com/sxyvbt.jpg


Yes, I find the woman's hands more scary than the cat is! :cold: :lol::lol: I think her claws are scarier than the cat's.

[ElizabethSewall]

The last one's definitely my favourite Emily! :lol: :lol:

[woeful painter]

http://i2.tinypic.com/sxysmr.jpg

Great! My kind of cat! Har! Har! :D :brow:

[ElizabethSewall]

http://www.treefrogmusic.org/lineup/sept172005-thumbnails/Mean-EyedCat.jpg
http://www.evilgenius.net/albums/abuse/timmy_bat_001.jpg

[Riesa]

another photoshopped ugly cat:
http://www.charlestonbiker.net/images/HUMOR/cat1.jpg


and if your beloved pet dies, cat cloning is available!

cat cloning (http://www.savingsandclone.com/services/cat_cloning.html)

[Stanislaw]

cat cloaning...almost looks real. :rolleyes:

[emily655321]

Elizabeth— I want an evil bat-cat! I want one! Gimme! :D


http://www.charlestonbiker.net/images/HUMOR/cat1.jpgGrandmother, what green eyes you have! :goof:


and if your beloved pet dies, cat cloning is available!
*shudder* That seems like a psychologically healthy trend. :rolleyes:

[RobinHood3000]

Violent lil buggers, aren't they?

[Stanislaw]

Wasnt there an Arnold Shwarzenager movie with cloaning pets?

[ElizabethSewall]

Elizabeth— I want an evil bat-cat! I want one! Gimme! :D
You get the cat, I'll make the bat wings! Hehe, we could make an army! :brow:

[Nightshade]

Wasnt there an Arnold Shwarzenager movie with cloaning pets?
Yes 6th day I think, it was.
Again eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek I might have to void this thread from here on in
Humm is that cloning for real?!:eek2:

[emily655321]

You get the cat, I'll make the bat wings! Hehe, we could make an army! :brow:Even better than flying monkeys! :D

[Stanislaw]

With Tazers on their heads!!!!!!:D

[daddysfiddler]

Cats aren't the only ones to be extremely ugly. This is Sam the world's ugliest dog. He has won the contest for 3 years in a row. He died in November which is really sad, but he was still really ugly. He was very good for our world, because his owner had such a good relationship with him, that other people are now adopting unadoptable animals. <><

[Pensive]

Ah poor creature....

I feel sorry for Sam.

[Stanislaw]

Ah poor creature....

I feel sorry for Sam.

Do any of you work for the ID software company...designing doom! :D
Not for people a feered of digital monsters (http://www.doomworld.com/doom3/review/img/ohnoeshellknights.jpg)

http://exploration.vanderbilt.edu/images/news/article_main/news_mammals_main.jpg

and

http://www.imagequest3d.com/ImageFolio3_files/gallery/aquatic/chordata/osteichthyes/PJH00091.jpg
A deep see 'hairy' angler fish...

and

Too gross to just show...click if ye dare...well, its only a hagfish. (http://bio.fsu.edu/~bsc2011l/graphics/Kingdom_Animalia/5_Eucoelomates/phylum_chordata/agnatha_hagfish.jpg)

[ElizabethSewall]

:eek: :eek2: :cold: :bawling:

[tn2743]

same feelings!!!

[Stanislaw]

Heh, sorry, just nobody posted up those lovelies yet. :sick:

[emily655321]

:lol: Scary fishies, Stan.

So much ugly in the world! :D

[jackyyyy]

Well, thanks for the warning, Stan, you know some of us don't read warning signs and... what a cutie haggie fish,, soooooooo cute...I wanna ten of 'em to give to me best friends in da World, and make dem soooooo happy. That mole is right out of Alien. Such a cute mole.

And, that lovely nice doggy woggy, Sam... don't you just want to put him on your lap and let him lick your face..... right off.

They could rate threads for cuteness.

[Xamonas Chegwe]

All cute things are the same. But all of us ugly sods are ugly in our own unique way!

[amuse]

i totally freaked out when i saw that mole! *shivers

[Nightshade]

i totally freaked out when i saw that mole! *shivers
me too!
Didnt mind the hag fishh much but that mole is (insert what ever-ing word you like) scary ! :cold:

[Stanislaw]

me too!
Didnt mind the hag fishh much but that mole is (insert what ever-ing word you like) scary ! :cold:

Really...I thought the hagfish was the nastiest o the bunch...but the mole is pretty creapy. :D

[RJbibliophil]

I think there might be a reason why those fish hide deep down in the ocean where there's hardly any light, and the mole digs in the ground. That mole didn't look too attractive, but star nosed moles have good noses for their habitat. There might also be a reason why many books use illustrations of animals rather than pictures. :D

:P I decided that there are cats, and then there's a sub-breed: ninja cats. I came to this conclusion because some cats are sweet and innocent whereas others are evil by free will or by force(torture) or design(photoshop) Emily was giving us examples of ninja cats so that we might avoid them.... right?

[Stanislaw]

:P I decided that there are cats, and then there's a sub-breed: ninja cats. I came to this conclusion because some cats are sweet and innocent whereas others are evil by free will or by force(torture) or design(photoshop) Emily was giving us examples of ninja cats so that we might avoid them.... right?

...or turn them into chum for SWRB!!!!! :D

[RJbibliophil]

...or turn them into chum for SWRB!!!!! :D

What do you mean by SWRB?
And I will back up my viewpoint until you can prove me wrong! :brow:

[Jay]

Shark With ReBreather :p, check out the Dasterdly ship thread :D

[Stanislaw]

Shark With ReBreather :p, check out the Dasterdly ship thread :D

Gar that be correct...he be a shark...with a rebreather so he can breath on land!

[Jay]

Ever seen Hellboy? That Blue character? That's a rebreather :p
piccy (http://www.blister.jp/images-item-big/ref1-1127.jpg)

[Stanislaw]

indeed that be doubly correct! :D

heh, twas an odd movie though :thumbs_up

[Jay]

I liked it, lol.

[Stanislaw]

It was cool, and kinda funny to!

[Jay]

And kinda cute, lol :p

[Stanislaw]

And kinda cute, lol :p
:goof: er the fish guy? or the pyrotechnic lass? :brow:

[RobinHood3000]

Abe Sapiens, very cool!

[Jay]

:goof: er the fish guy? or the pyrotechnic lass? :brow:
Actually, the Red guy :p

[Stanislaw]

Actually, the Red guy :p
:goof: heh, oh vell. :D

[Jay]

You didn't like him? I thought he was funny. Even if he liked cats ;)

[RobinHood3000]

Listen, Sammy, I'm not a very good shot, but the Samaritan here uses really big bullets, so...

How you doin' back there, Ivan?
(If I had legs, I would kick your ***!)
<sigh> Would you hold him? He's so darn negative.

[Lote-Tree]

Beg to differ! Cat's are awesome, dogs are always sleep when I awake but cat's want to play! yay!


CATS are the laziest animal in the world!!! My Sister had one, my brother had one, my grandmother had one.... And they were ALL LAZY!!!

They ATE LAVISH MEALS each day and these were NOT YOUR CRAPPY CAT FOOD FROM ALDI but top shops like SAINSBURY's!!!

And they ate and slept and did lots of do do!!! plenty!!!!

Only insane person owns a cat these days!!! and BOND FILM VILLIANS!!!

Cats and villiany seems to go hand in hand together!!! :D

[Bakiryu]

OOOOh, I am a villain! Need a villany name. Baki-mort? Baruman? Bauron?

Cats are perfect! You just can't see it.

[Lote-Tree]

Cats are perfect! You just can't see it.

I see right through their deception! :D

They can't use me anymore. I have wisenend up :D

No more a mug :D

[Bakiryu]

No one is inhmune to fluffy cuteness!

[Lote-Tree]

Why have you put my post here?
What's going here?

I don't care-less about what cats looks like.

My thread is about lazyness of cats.

[Bakiryu]

not lazy! cat's are hyperkinetic!

[Lote-Tree]

not lazy! cat's are hyperkinetic!

Cats are hyper-manipulative!!!
And they know it and laugh behind our backs :D

[Bakiryu]

why aren't you insulting dogs instead? they're over-happy!

[barbara0207]

What do you expect of cats whom you feed luxury food all day without letting them out? They will grow lazy and fat.

My cats were not lazy when they were young. They climbed up our Christmas tree, chased their own and each other's tails, caught mice and laid them at my feet. (Only they forgot to kill them first, so I had to go hunting mice in the kitchen with my shoe. :D )

Now the two tomcats are grandfathers and like to sleep more. But that's only natural, isn't it?

[Lote-Tree]

why aren't you insulting dogs instead? they're over-happy!

Dog's are man's best friend and they guard the house :D

Cat's these days because they are over fed find chasing mices beneath them :D

[NikolaiI]

What do you expect of cats whom you feed luxury food all day without letting them out? They will grow lazy and fat.

My cats were not lazy when they were young. They climbed up our Christmas tree, chased their own and each other's tails, caught mice and laid them at my feet. (Only they forgot to kill them first, so I had to go hunting mice in the kitchen with my shoe. :D )

Now the two tomcats are grandfathers and like to sleep more. But that's only natural, isn't it?

You kill the mice?!!!:flare: Haha jk. I haven't killed a mouse in a few years but I used to, I would feed the snakes occasionally. I love mice though. It's just the cycle of life, though. Snakes are so mindless I don't really think it's wrong at all to keep them in a cage. They are awesome pets, when you have them on your arm, they just sort of sink into you.

Anyway cats do have that strange habit of leaving them alive, don't they? I had animals when I was a kid, obviously I was around snakes. When I was very young we had a couple different dogs go by, but had a lot of cats when i was very young.

Oh, um...I love both cats and dogs, but certain ones more than others! But some dogs I have had an amazing kinship with, you know because they have the pack-bonding instincts, which cats don't have, and I'd actually say I value my relationships with some dogs I've had more than cats. But I really value and love cats, too, you know? I feel closer to dogs socially and I also feel they are slightly more intelligent because trainable, but cats are just cats, you know?

There's just something heartbreaking about the love of some dogs; when you leave them, if you have to leave them they can sense it, and they don't want you to go. I don't think a cat would sense that if you walked out of the house with a duffel bag or suitcase. So, maybe cats and dogs become attached to us differently?

[BulletproofDork]

There's just something heartbreaking about the love of some dogs; when you leave them, if you have to leave them they can sense it, and they don't want you to go. I don't think a cat would sense that if you walked out of the house with a duffel bag or suitcase. So, maybe cats and dogs become attached to us differently?

I beg to differ:)

Last summer, a few days before I left for camp, my cat was really . . . sulky, I guess. He would rub against our feet, sit in our laps, cuddle in bed, etc. (He dosen't do those things very often.)
I don't know if it's just wishful thinking, but I'd say Rony a k a Ronald Reagen(my cat), really knew that I was going to leave.

CATS RULE, DOGS DROOL!!!!!!!!!!!;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;)

[barbara0207]

Same with our cats. When we leave for our summer holidays, they get restless a few days before, and they hardly ever go outside any more. Although they are well looked after by my mother-in-law and they like her, they don't want us to go. And they always lose weight in the holidays because they do not eat properly.

[Bakiryu]

There's just something heartbreaking about the love of some dogs; when you leave them, if you have to leave them they can sense it, and they don't want you to go. I don't think a cat would sense that if you walked out of the house with a duffel bag or suitcase. So, maybe cats and dogs become attached to us differently?

My cat is the most awesome animal on Earth. I swear it can understand me. Every time I cry it stays by my side and tries to cheer me up. It will only trust me, and when I was leaving for Cuba it was so sad it just mewed and mewed and clung to my dress!

[samercury]

Cats are hyper-manipulative!!!
And they know it and laugh behind our backs :D

I completely agree! http://cosgan.de/images/kao/figuren/c055.gif
...but they're still pretty cool (I mean, come on, they're cats)