Home Waters

[Poppy]

Home Waters

A pristine flow snakes through
small boulders over a gravel bed
of small rock and ripples. She runs cold
and emerald where moss grows and hides
the food they need. Small insects are
abundant and hatches thrive feeding
living creatures in a natural cycle of
survival. Late summer winds cause
hoppers to be offered as a treat, a meal
they can’t resist. As fall approaches
her old and wise inhabitants begin their
trip back up, chancing the shallows,
amorously building beds following an
ancient instinct. The old dame and her
creatures are vulnerable, just as if she
were among us breathing life. Her name
is Taneycomo and just like a frail old
woman she and her children have to be
given attention for them to continue to
exist.
I must protect her.
I will pass her on to the next generation.
I am her steward.

[Granny5]

Home Waters

A pristine flow snakes through
small boulders over a gravel bed
of small rock and ripples. She runs cold
and emerald where moss grows and hides
the food they need. Small insects are
abundant and hatches thrive feeding
living creatures in a natural cycle of
survival. Late summer winds cause
hoppers to be offered as a treat, a meal
they can’t resist. As fall approaches
her old and wise inhabitants begin their
trip back up, chancing the shallows,
amorously building beds following an
ancient instinct. The old dame and her
creatures are vulnerable, just as if she
were among us breathing life. Her name
is Taneycomo and just like a frail old
woman she and her children have to be
given attention for them to continue to
exist.
I must protect her.
I will pass her on to the next generation.
I am her steward.

It's great, really great. And you do a good job
with Trout Unlimited in protecting her.

[motherhubbard]

I loved the determination at the end of this. I'm very proud that you work in the community to protect the environment. You speak about this water as if it were a treasure and it is.

[Pendragon]

Something a Native American would definately love, treating Nature as alive and to be enjoyed, used but not wasted, taste the boquet but don't trash the party. Love it, Poppy! Nature's poet you are indeed!

http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l108/AbsalomKane/Smilies/ZwinkyPenII.gif

[PrinceMyshkin]

I'm with Pendragon in admiring your relationship to nature. At times it seems as if this is your very own blood, sinews, ligaments, muscles you're speaking of as much as the blood, sinews, ligaments and muscles of the natural scene.

And there's something special in the way this torrent of observed and loved aspects of nature quietens down at the end to your soft-spoken but nonetheless sincere intent to be its guardian.

[Granny5]

Hey Pen, that is Poppy! well, except for the hair..pop has no hair now. I think he pulled it all out when mh was a teenager.

[AuntShecky]

The only changes I would suggest are: breaking up the lines so it appears more verse-like and less prose-like.
Also, what is the antecedent for the pronoun "they" in the
line: "and hides the food they need"?
Other than that, any lover of nature is a friend o' mine. You had me at the title: "Home Waters"
Auntie

[ampoule]

and I am singing.....'From the land of sky blue waters....'
Keep up the good work for nature, and, for us!

[Poppy]

Thanks everyone for your kind words and encouragement. I just am very passionate about keeping our environs clean and healthy and especially our rivers and streams.
Shecky are you saying that my antecedant should be in that same line?
The antecedent of they would be the noun, fish. Thanks for the suggestions.
I'll play around with the lines too.
~Poppy