I

[Bii]

Probably everyone who writes poetry writes one of these at some point. This is my offering.

I

I am the bowl to which the blood was spilt.
I am the book's forgotten theme.
I am the cracks in the ivy-riddled wall.
I am the veins in the eye of the beholder.
I am the broken chain that mocks the door.
I am the pause between the tick and the tock.
I am the still before the breaking storm.
I am the crease in the fabric of time.
I am the pale between the night and the dawn.
I am the silver cusp of the wave.
I am the hesitation in a lover’s voice.
I am the memory of a misplaced dream.
I am the things both seen, and unseen.

[motherhubbard]

that was lovely Bii, as always. You are a very interesting and talented lady. I haven't written one, but I will.

[Bii]

Thanks motherhubbard you are, as always, very kind.

[PrinceMyshkin]

Probably everyone who writes poetry writes one of these at some point. This is my offering.

I

I am the bowl to which the blood was split.
I am the books forgotten theme.
I am the cracks in the ivy-riddled wall.
I am the veins in the eye of the beholder.
I am the broken chain that mocks the door.
I am the pause between the tick and the tock.
I am the still before the breaking storm.
I am the crease in the fabric of time.
I am the pale between the night and the dawn.
I am the silver cusp of the wave.
I am the hesitation in a lover’s voice.
I am the memory of a misplaced dream.
I am the things both seen, and unseen.

There was something about this that frightened me somewhat from the beginning, as if you might be about to tell me more about yourself (or the persina) than I wanted to know or would be able to handle. The rhyme scheme is shot to hell, but never mind. I love this. It feels so intimate, not necessarily because of the particular images but just having the courage to say "I am." Some of the statements are [rude Anglo-Saxon word] stunning!

I'm tempted to try one of my own but am intimidated by how good this is - stupid male competitiveness. Do you have that over there?

[dramasnot6]

Very creative, I interpreted it as an attempt to define what is ¨human¨.
The last line worked well.

[Bii]

Thank you all for reading and for your comments.

What I was trying to say with this was how impossible it is to define who 'I' am. When you think about it, when you think about 'I' it's actually impossible to put your finger on what makes you, you. What you can see are your thoughts, reactions, emotions, experience, memory but if you were to change any of these things would you still be 'you', if I change my way of thinking, does that change what it is to be 'me'? That's why a lot of the images I've used are things in between, or things that are hidden or unnoticed, pauses, breaks, that sort of thing.



I'm tempted to try one of my own but am intimidated by how good this is - stupid male competitiveness. Do you have that over there?

I'm sure your offering would be much better than mine! And yes, we definitely have male competitiveness over here, it's just quieter, and more like an endurance test, who can withstand the most affrontery, and display the most excessive politeness?!

[Pensive]

Wow Bii! This is amazing!

[firefangled]

Probably everyone who writes poetry writes one of these at some point. This is my offering.

I

I am the bowl to which the blood was split.
I am the books forgotten theme.
I am the cracks in the ivy-riddled wall.
I am the veins in the eye of the beholder.
I am the broken chain that mocks the door.
I am the pause between the tick and the tock.
I am the still before the breaking storm.
I am the crease in the fabric of time.
I am the pale between the night and the dawn.
I am the silver cusp of the wave.
I am the hesitation in a lover’s voice.
I am the memory of a misplaced dream.
I am the things both seen, and unseen.

These are always courageous poems and this one is no exception. All of the lines are remarkable, so much so that you might have taken advantage of some hidden poetics in which line came before which or was juxtapositioned with what. I hesitate to say my choices because I don't like to do that; you certainly have your own in what is here or what you might change.

I enjoyed this very much.

[PrinceMyshkin]

These are always courageous poems and this one is no exception. All of the lines are remarkable, so much so that you might have taken advantage of some hidden poetics in which line came before which or was juxtapositioned with what. I hesitate to say my choices because I don't like to do that; you certainly have your own in what is here or what you might change.

I enjoyed this very much.

I understand both your admiration for this and your reluctance to single out one, two or twenty favourite lines, but I want to single out the one line that I don't like in this

I am the silver cusp of the wave
It comes across to me as the one line that's a little too premeditated, calculated, very pretty - but that's the problem: irresistably vivid as so many if not all the other lines are, they are not merely pictureque. That line, I think, is. Sometimes Keats and his "Beauty is truth, truth beauty" is about as dead wrong as a poet can be.

[ampoule]

I paused at that also. It doesn't seem worthy of the rest.

Can someone explain the first line to me? I'm probably showing my ignorance but isn't it better to ask?

[PrinceMyshkin]

I paused at that also. It doesn't seem worthy of the rest.

Can someone explain the first line to me? I'm probably showing my ignorance but isn't it better to ask?

I had a hard time with that first line myself, wonderfully arresting as I thought it was, and sought and received an explanation from Bii that makes excellent sense of it but think I should leave it to her to offer it if she chooses or you might write to her yourself. Although she lives in England, she speaks normal.

[Pendragon]

I may be strange, but the last two lines were what made the poem for me. Bravo!

Pen

http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l108/AbsalomKane/Smilies/PuppyLove.gif

[Bii]

It's interesting to see that the first line has caused much confusion! I had to give it some thought to explain it myself, mainly because the line just appeared, out of nowhere, and popped into my head. But that being said it does have a reason, here goes... The line is a representation of sacrifice, because part of being human is to sacrifice, but it's not just about the sacrifice but rather about being the receptacle, or receipient of the sacrifice (rather than the sacrificee). We receive the sacrifices of others, and that affects who we are. Our parents make sacrifices for us, and the kind of sacrifices they make (whether we fully understand this or not) shapes who we become. This process continues through life, partners do it, strangers do it, we don't see it but it shapes us.


I want to single out the one line that I don't like in this


I am the silver cusp of the wave

It comes across to me as the one line that's a little too premeditated, calculated, very pretty - but that's the problem: irresistably vivid as so many if not all the other lines are, they are not merely pictureque. That line, I think, is. Sometimes Keats and his "Beauty is truth, truth beauty" is about as dead wrong as a poet can be.

Yes, I agree, it doesn't quite fit with the rest. I will probably remove it, or perhaps replace it with something else. Perhaps if I had said 'I am the breaking cusp of the wave' that would have fitted better, and not been so pretty. I'll give it some thought. Watch this space.....

[ampoule]

I understand sacrifice. I just didn't understand split. I kept wanting to read it spilt and maybe even spit. But yes, sacrifice goes many ways.

[PrinceMyshkin]

I understand sacrifice. I just didn't understand split. I kept wanting to read it spilt and maybe even spit. But yes, sacrifice goes many ways.

Wow! I too read it as "spilt" and had to go back now and confirm that you were right (or rather that the ineffable Bii was wrong!)

Bii! I beseech you, correct that or before a jury of your peers, explain how "split" is meant.

[Bii]

It is now corrected. It's the lightning fingers that are to blame.

Spilt....

EDIT

Meant to say, well spotted ampoule!

[PrinceMyshkin]

It is now corrected. It's the lightning fingers that are to blame.

Spilt....

MANY THANKS and could you now please get on to reconciling the General Theory of Relativity with Quantumn Dynamics?

[PrinceMyshkin]

I am not one of the one-third of my people that Hitler & Co. managed to get their hands on and squeeze to death
I am not the brilliant, widely admired, handsomely reimbursed novelist I believed I was meant to be
I am not the author of my own destiny.
I am not the gentle, patient lover of all mankind except for those who are cruel to me
I am not yet what I hope to be...

[Bii]

I am not one of the one-third of my people that Hitler & Co. managed to get their hands on and squeeze to death
I am not the brilliant, widely admired, handsomely reimbursed novelist I believed I was meant to be
I am not the author of my own destiny.
I am not the gentle, patient lover of all mankind except for those who are cruel to me
I am not yet what I hope to be...



Interesting, but surely this is cheating? We can all list expansively the things were are not, for example:

I am not Paris Hilton
I am not a millionaire
I am not a rocket scientist
I am not going to reconcile the General Theory of Relativity with Quantum Dynamics
I am not an artist
I am not American

and so on, and so forth.

The challenge lies in stating who you are.

The gauntlet is at your feet....

[PrinceMyshkin]

Interesting, but surely this is cheating? We can all list expansively the things were are not, for example:

I am not Paris Hilton
I am not a millionaire
I am not a rocket scientist
I am not going to reconcile the General Theory of Relativity with Quantum Dynamics
I am not an artist
I am not American

and so on, and so forth.

The challenge lies in stating who you are.

The gauntlet is at your feet....
I am a person with a gauntlet lying at his feet
I am a father and a grandfather whose heart has thrice been expanded and then five times over again
I am a poet who feels himself challenged by others (such as your) wonderful use of imagery and metaphor to describe themselves
I am a 72 year old male who cannot accept that he is no longer 71, let alone 28
I am envy
I am sometimes inexplicable and unmeasurable happiness
I am the recipient of more than I can ever repay
I am truthfullness
I am whimsy
I am Superman and shmuck and, happily, sometimes in between
I am absolutely not going to go on with this any longer!

[Bii]

I am a person with a gauntlet lying at his feet
I am a father and a grandfather whose heart has thrice been expanded and then five times over again
I am a poet who feels himself challenged by others (such as your) wonderful use of imagery and metaphor to describe themselves
I am a 72 year old male who cannot accept that he is no longer 71, let alone 28
I am envy
I am sometimes inexplicable and unmeasurable happiness
I am the recipient of more than I can ever repay
I am truthfullness
I am whimsy
I am Superman and shmuck and, happily, sometimes in between
I am absolutely not going to go on with this any longer!


He he, I like this :)

I particularly like the line "I am the receipient of more than I can ever repay", which is true of all of us, which means that if we all receive more than we can pay back, is there a terrible cosmic imbalance out there?
Also liked the Superman line!

[ampoule]

This is fun. May I try?

I am the object of Charlie Brown's desires.
I am Anne Shirley, on my father's side.
I am Suzanne Verdal who will feed you tea and oranges.
I am Ruth who gleans in a field of words.
I am an Irish Setter whose joie de vivre mingles with a Bassett Hound heart.
I am "Sous le dome epais" on an Everly Brothers scale, both parts.
I am Pele erupting but quickly soothed by Pacific waves.
I am Monet attempting to draw caricatures.
I am a tender roast beef dinner with mashed potatoes and gravy.
I am a lemon meringue pie, for dessert.


Now I think I've spent WAY too much time thinking about myself.
Maybe I wasn't supposed to put this here? I wish more people would write one of these. Por favor?

[Bii]

This is fun. May I try?

I am the object of Charlie Brown's desires.
I am Anne Shirley, on my father's side.
I am Suzanne Verdal who will feed you tea and oranges.
I am Ruth who gleans in a field of words.
I am an Irish Setter whose joie de vivre mingles with a Bassett Hound heart.
I am "Sous le dome epais" on an Everly Brothers scale, both parts.
I am Pele erupting but quickly soothed by Pacific waves.
I am Monet attempting to draw caricatures.
I am a tender roast beef dinner with mashed potatoes and gravy.
I am a lemon meringue pie, for dessert.


Now I think I've spent WAY too much time thinking about myself.
Maybe I wasn't supposed to put this here? I wish more people would write one of these. Por favor?


This is great ampoule, though it has made me hungry :)

Let's have some more. (I'm off to find some roast beef - yum, yum, yum!)

[ampoule]

Once again......I WISH MORE PEOPLE WOULD WRITE ONE OF THESE!

[CdnReader]

.

I am Scarlett O'Hara, without the Scarlett
I am constructed of iron that I created in my own blast furnace
I am as flimsy as a house of cards
I am Strider, dark-clothed, hidden, stalwart
I am Merry and Pippin, a little silly but still mostly brave
I am the most un-mechanical person you have ever met
I am as wild as a tornado, and as crumpled as yesterday's news
I am the spray of the surf and the one unique snowflake amid a storm full of unique snowflakes
I am the comet's tail and Saturn's rings
I am the piano in a piece of music that was meant for saxophone
I am a very tiny facet, reflecting, within a very large creation
I am my father's daughter
I am a product of my past and my future
I am a student of the universe
I am in love with life

.

[firefangled]

I am the first born and first survivor
I am the Jellicle cat’s meow
I am a room among desert flowers
I am midnight walking
I am the hands of my grandfather
I am a child in stained glass
I am the wire gripped by bird feet
I am a Radio Flyer collecting dreams
I am the treetop in the wind
I am the Alhambra’s red fountains
I am the warmth of Madeira wine
I am the hitchhiker of forgotten highways
I am the angel who traded his wings with an eagle
I am the father of a warrior princess
I am the father of an apprentice sorceress
I am the gospel of dogs
I am a strange and wonderful sadness
I am sweet molasses in warm milk
I am the berry for which you must be scratched
I am the oracle of ones and zeros
I am the cornfield in which I was lost
I am the gratitude for all things small
I am a well in distant mountains
I am the question you will never answer
I am a tear in rain

[ampoule]

It is wonderful to meet you both, Cdn and Fire. How wonderful it is to give you a hug or pat you on the back or maybe both.

[apples of gold]

I am a lover of crows, of blue jays, of sparrows, of birds, a lover of birds
I am envious of my cat's imaginary friend
I am resenting my cat for terrorizing the mouse that lives under my patio
I am a virtual surgeon skilled in the art of beam in the eye removal
I am in the process of removing a speck from my eye
I am
I am therefore I don’t know what I am.
I am a poor thirsty traveler in an oasis of pay-per-sips
I am a little voice that kicks your *** when you’re in the trough
I am having fun
I am a Mother first
I am kind
I am looking for my misplaced short story notebook I take with me to the park. If you find it,
will you tell me what’s written in it? I am a recovering workaholic
I am nice
I am a biker chick wannabe
I am trapped in a Kafka story reciting my lines.
I am blue in ways that would make the sky blush
I am woman (without all the fanfare)
I am liked by my neighbors
I am amazed you actually read this far
I am a good gardener
I am sorry. I am Canadian.
I am sparing you the eh?
I am done

[PrinceMyshkin]

I am a lover of crows, of blue jays, of sparrows, of birds, a lover of birds
I am envious of my cat's imaginary friend
I am resenting my cat for terrorizing the mouse that lives under my patio
I am a virtual surgeon skilled in the art of beam in the eye removal
I am in the process of removing a speck from my eye
I am
I am therefore I don’t know what I am.
I am a poor thirsty traveler in an oasis of pay-per-sips
I am a little voice that kicks your *** when you’re in the trough
I am having fun
I am a Mother first
I am kind
I am looking for my misplaced short story notebook I take with me to the park. If you find it,
will you tell me what’s written in it? I am a recovering workaholic
I am nice
I am a biker chick wannabe
I am trapped in a Kafka story reciting my lines.
I am blue in ways that would make the sky blush
I am woman (without all the fanfare)
I am liked by my neighbors
I am amazed you actually read this far
I am a good gardener
I am sorry. I am Canadian.
I am sparing you the eh?
I am done

God, how funny and touching this is, eh? I'm especially nuts about "I am blue in ways that would make the sky blush" and "woman (without all the fanfare)" which is simultaneously feminist and funny. And of course "I am sorry. I am Canadian" could well replace our national anthem!

I LOVE this (and, btw, YOU)!

[ampoule]

I love dem apples! ;)
I am very very nervous about your short story notebook and I am leaving now to search for it.

[apples of gold]

Ahhh! Gosh darn you two are sweet. Luv you too Jer.

And you Amp are indeed serendipity. Write something in it for me.

I am not done
I am longwinded
I am the smile that some suspect there is an ulterior reason for
I am intuitive
I am hard to switch on and even harder to switch off
I am only now realizing the thread is "I" only and I don't need to start these with I am
I better quit before I overstay my welcome

[PrinceMyshkin]

I am the living proof that Blake, when he wrote "If the fool would persist in his folly, he would become wise," was wrong! I am the fool who persisted in his folly until he became the grand-father of the fool he had been!

I am the next-to-latest victim in the wars of love. While the one who came after me is gushing blood, mine is only slip-slop-slopping out.

I am the phoenix waiting for the last of my former incarnations to turn, at last, to ash...

I am the Cellini of self-pity, fashioning it into verse and fine, delicate silver goblets.

[PrinceMyshkin]

I love dem apples! ;)
I am very very nervous about your short story notebook and I am leaving now to search for it.

Not to worry overly much about that notebook. See in Personal Poetry:
Whatever became of Apples’ notebook?

[motherhubbard]

I am the flour that spills over the counter and onto the floor to be used for nothing else
I am the scent of autumn rot that comes in the window when everyone else is asleep
I am the culmination of all that I have and was and wanted and hoped and got
I am another night without sleep spent thinking of how tomorrow could be
I am the melt that tracks in on your shoes, and the one who cleans it up
I am the last dog day spent under the shade of the old piss-ellem tree
I am what is left at the end of the day that carries over to tomorrow
I am but one in a world of seven billion who wonder around
I am a foggy morning with coffee still too hot
I am often lonely, but rarely alone
I am a star in the milky way

[Bii]

I am the flour that spills over the counter and onto the floor to be used for nothing else
I am the scent of autumn rot that comes in the window when everyone else is asleep
I am the culmination of all that I have and was and wanted and hoped and got
I am another night without sleep spent thinking of how tomorrow could be
I am the melt that tracks in on your shoes, and the one who cleans it up
I am the last dog day spent under the shade of the old piss-ellem tree
I am what is left at the end of the day that carries over to tomorrow
I am but one in a world of seven billion who wonder around
I am a foggy morning with coffee still too hot
I am often lonely, but rarely alone
I am a star in the milky way

I like these motherhubbard, but I have to ask - what is a 'piss-ellem tree'?

A few more from me:

I am the person at the end of the queue
I am the last cigarette in the pack.
I am the browning leaf on the tree.
I am the cloud that obscures the sun.
I am the silence after a fight.
I am the empty chambers of your heart.
I am the last thought before you go to sleep.


Sorry had to add this, though it's not mine. Courtesy of the lovely Radiohead:

I am the key to the lock in your house that keeps the toys in the basement.

(climbing up the walls)

[PrinceMyshkin]

I am the flour that spills over the counter and onto the floor to be used for nothing else
I am the scent of autumn rot that comes in the window when everyone else is asleep
I am the culmination of all that I have and was and wanted and hoped and got
I am another night without sleep spent thinking of how tomorrow could be
I am the melt that tracks in on your shoes, and the one who cleans it up
I am the last dog day spent under the shade of the old piss-ellem tree
I am what is left at the end of the day that carries over to tomorrow
I am but one in a world of seven billion who wonder around
I am a foggy morning with coffee still too hot
I am often lonely, but rarely alone
I am a star in the milky way

I am the one who is marvelling at this poem.
I am the dog who is confused about the functioning of mankind
I am a 5'7 1/2" guy trying to pass for 5'8"
I am the father of some 500 + lbs of pretty much the neatest folk I know
I am the path to my own heart
I am the tears that fall when men and women who could be happy and love each other contrive, without much effort, to do otherwise
I am a man who is always surprised to be loved

[motherhubbard]

I have to ask - what is a 'piss-ellem tree'?



I took a picture, but I'm working on downloading it. It may be a while. It is a large tree that doesn't really offer much. People usually cut them down when they are small. But we have one that was let go and it is huge and makes a nice shade. It's not much to look at, but I like it.

[PrinceMyshkin]

I am a maelstrom in search of femaelstrom;
I am a Tornado in search of a Gail;
I am the storm before the calm of death which might of course be the stormiest time of all;
I am the limb in search of the body whose phantom pain I still feel

[Tabula_Rasa]

it reminds me of this song by The Divine Comedy - Gin-soaked Boy... it goes in a similar way...

Im the darkness in the light
Im the leftness in the right
Im the rightness in the wrong
Im the shortness in the long
Im the goodness in the bad
Im the saneness in the mad
Im the sadness in the joy
Im the gin in the gin-soaked boy

Im the ghost in the machine
Im the genius in the gene
Im the beauty in the beast
Im the sunset in the east
Im the ruby in the dust
Im the trust in the mistrust
Im the trojan horse in troy
Im the gin in the gin-soaked boy

Im the tigers empty cage
Im the mysterys final page
Im the strangers lonely glance
Im the heros only chance
Im the undiscovered land
Im the single grain of sand
Im the christmas morning toy
Im the gin in the gin-soaked boy

Im the world youll never see
Im the slave youll never free
Im the truth youll never know
Im the place youll never go
Im the sound youll never hear
Im the course youll never steer
Im the will youll not destroy
Im the gin in the gin-soaked boy

Im the half-truth in the lie
Im the why not in the why
Im the last roll of the die
Im the old school in the tie
Im the spirit in the sky
Im the catcher in the rye
Im the twinkle in her eye
Im the jeff goldblum in the fly

Who am i?

[Pendragon]

I am the night.
I am the cold dank mist that rises and chills the bones.
I exist in the slinking shadows and the darkness that creeps into the soul.
I am the pale eye of the moon--shimmering mockery of the life-giving sun.
I am sound that echoes in the vacuum of silence—
Turning that which is so familiar
Into that which is terrifying.
I am the eyes that light up the night—
Millions of them—
Yellow, green, blue—
And the deep hue of scarlet like drops of gore come to life—
Nightmare eyes that you cannot turn away...
All these things form a part of me—
Perhaps, I may not want them, but they are there, nonetheless.
I am your friend and your enemy;
Your ally and a stranger.
I am a wanderer and I am the night...

Dale Harris
© 6/26/95