Shorth New Poem..

[Adolescent09]

The Silence Tune

I'm in the open of the silence tune
where nothing's note is in my ear
typing a letter in blank of loom
on my fissured head of indented seams

Stillness camps in a cube of peace,
and words won't flow from lips of parch,
so silence's node slips with ease
to stifle noise's light in dark.

[firefangled]

The Silence Tune

I'm in the open of the silence tune
where nothing's note is in my ear
typing a letter in blank of loom
on my fissured head of indented seams

Stillness camps in a cube of peace,
and words won't flow from lips of parch,
so silence's node slips with ease
to stifle noise's light in dark.


Adol, you set yourself up for a difficult challenge with descriptives and I think you did it quite well. This has good control, it's compact. What each line says is much longer than the line itself. It makes us think.

[Pendragon]

I agree. The poem is masterful. Words evoke images and paint pictures in the mind of the readers. Nice work, 'Dole! http://smilies.vidahost.com/games/dbz/dragonball-wishdragon.gif

[ampoule]

There IS a tune to silence, isn't there? Thank you. I love thinking about this.
Very nice.