Where do you go when I’m wrong?

[Bluemauvey]

Removed by the author due to the triggering of the 'Pearls Before Swine' clause.

[Isagel]

Too bad. This little piggy found the title interesting.

[ennison]

Poor swine, forever destined to be in the muck, then just pork.

[Bluemauvey]

Ok, due to fleeting interest...and a porcine snouting I will re-submit the literary truffle that is...;)

Where do you go when I’m wrong?

Where do you go when I’m wrong?
Is it with the traffic’s dimp that smoulders through this newspaper city?
Is it on the engine song that ululates and shrieks the tortured chimney?
Are you to be found in railway cuts or in stitches? Where do you go when I’m wrong?

Where do you go when I’m wrong?
Do the elevators applaud the dropping of your weight?
Does the rising street bring liquorice relief, do you motorway?
Is the going good to firm, are you bound for long?
Where do you go when I’m wrong?

Where do you go when I’m wrong?
Should I look in pawnshop windows for your bargain?
Should I negotiate the old days eh, to Zzzzz?
Do the newspaper vans press gang you away?
Where do you go when I’m wrong?

Where do you go when I’m wrong?
Is it to destinations restless in their cribs?
To shaky starts, to toddle?
Are you with strangers, belonging?
Where do you go when I’m wrong?

Where do you go when I’m wrong?
Are you summoned, courted, wooed?
Are you decked, awash, tied up with beaus?
Are you approved?
Where do you go when I’m wrong?

Where do you go when I’m wrong?
Is it safely in the thunder, the thrum?
In overcoat pockets, scratched on watch faces?
Is it along the sewers, through the drains you run?
Where do you go when I’m wrong?

Where do you go when I’m wrong?
Sidling along the shortness of our words?
Do you sink with them, conspiring?
Can you be dowsed, twigged from concrete?
Can I rescue you, half drowned?

Can I not buy you with this buttered pound?
Can I not use the old song?

Where do you go when I’m wrong?

© 2007 L W Daly

[ennison]

AH HA! Definitely a semi-precious gem.

[Bluemauvey]

AH HA! Definitely a semi-precious gem.

Under this sort of pressure diamonds are formed. :D

[blp]

Eh? What was the pearls before swine clause? Why on earth would you remove this? Good stuff. In a rush, but will try to comment more later.

[blp]

Oh, I get it. It came down because no one commented. God this site's annoying like that.

Shades of Frank O'Hara? Well, that's who it reminds me of immediately.

I especially like the ending, the buttered pound, good nonsense, and the looping back in of the song talking about itself.

I have a sense of someone frenziedly entertaining themselves in the midst of a crisis. Can't help feeling, if that's the case, that that could be described a little more, without losing the fantastical quality - darker fantasies of what the absent lover (?) is doing or thinking in relation to the wrongness. In fact, 'Under this sort of pressure diamonds are formed' could be a line in the poem and do some of that work.

Why do you not break L4 half way through in keeping with the rest of the structure. And what, if anything, is a dimp?

[ennison]

I LOVED IT. It's highly personal. I did not understand it but it whacked me in the solum plexum