screwed up boyfriends/girlfriends [Archive]

amuse

03-14-2004, 01:28 AM

around 10 years ago i was the screwy one (well, it continued too long, actually); i was distraught re: my present-day boyfriend and called his football coach, bawling, at 1 a.m. lordy! that was just wrong. and what an amazing man; he stayed on the phone with me and calmed me down.
that's something i don't remember often, because it's so completely embarassing. no one was happy about that of course.
my love and i have a beautiful relationship now - a miracle of sorts. plus i've learned to relax and trust. good old father time. bless him.

Koa

03-14-2004, 12:04 PM

Now don't complain cos you asked.

Despite my embarassingly old age, I've only had a screwed, horrible long-distance relationship. He tried everything for me, I was never happy. I'm still trying to recover, he's still trying to make me believe in him, but I feel like I'm getting schizophrenic, my life was here and my brain was there... Now I want to live my life.
Screwed things he did...oh they were so many, most of them I've never told anyone cos I'd be too embarassed. Well the first time he visited me here he didn't even want to go on a trip to Venice (2 hours by train from where i live), none of my friends wanted to believe that a foreigner, given the possibility, would refuse to see Venice! (we went the next time, but it was january, not really hte best weather...). Well this is the only thing that comes to my mind that Im not too embarassed to tell.

I have a crush on another guy now, I took the bold step of revealing it...wow, he has nothing against me but he doesnt want any stories because of the vision of life he has nowadays. Great, I don't feel i have time to wait, I feel old and hopeless and I need to solve my situation soon, before I get really insane.

So what's screwed is my love life. And then they ask me why I am depressed.

How long will it pass before I regret having written this and I delete it? Sundays are frustrating, when all your friends are too busy with boyfriends and you're alone with your mental masturbation.

ihrocks

03-14-2004, 12:13 PM

My best/worst date-from-h*ll story --

Following the difficult break-up of a long-term relationship, I was feeling very low, life was not good, and one day, to top it all off, my car broke down. The tow-truck driver who was sent to retrieve me and my car and take us home seemed like an okay enough guy, and his obvious interest in me was very flattering to my wounded ego, so I agreed to go out with him.

He picks my up in his Corvette (fancy American sports car), which seems fine until I get in. He's restoring it and it's only about half-way there. Part of the half that isn't restored is the passenger seat which rocks and wobbles and slides back and forth with every turn and stop along the way. First, he takes me by "his" house, as he's picked me up straight from work and hasn't showered or changed clothes or anything. "His" house is really "his Mom's" house, but he's quick to inform me that she doesn't mind if he has "overnight guests."

He then takes me to a really bad and not particularly clean Mexican restaurant, the kind that serves the "gringo-style" Mexican food and not the real thing. And follows that with an evening at a road house where the youngest customer, besides us, is about 70, and the entertainment is some aging former beauty with bleached hair with a German accent singing (if you want to call it that) World War II songs at the piano bar.

I'll spare you the post-date details of his unpleasant attempts to uncloth my person and so forth.

Sadly, the date-from-hell didn't end there. He kept calling me for weeks for another date! When he didn't take the hint, I had to tell him I didn't really want to see him again. He starts screaming at me over the phone about our "breaking up"! There were a few scary nights sitting home with the lights off pretending to not be home, but I guess he decided I was b/witch enough not to bother with me any further.

Hope that cheers you up fool.

ihrocks
The Crossed Keys (http://hometown.aol.com/ihrocks/myhomepage/index.html)

Koa

03-14-2004, 12:22 PM

Lol @ ihrocks...

This reminds me that the most romantic place my guy took me to, was mac donalds...

I remembered that I once a date... well it was crazy, it was a guy I had seen only a couple of times on the bus, he was jamaican (never been succesful with my countrymen...) and quite beautiful...but damn, he kept sending too sweet messages (it feels fake if it's someone you dont really know!), and at the date he was like 'you will give me your photo and i'll stick it on the wall':rolleyes: and 'how long it is since you last had sex':rolleyes: (which of course I refused to answer!!!), and he showed me his AIDS test to prove he doesnt carry illnesses... My God... he then walked with me to my house, but thankfully I live in a big blovk of flats and he'd never find me, especially cos he doesnt even know my surname... Well then 15 minutes later he called me on the phone to say he was back home... Guess it would have been a very annoying relationship if it worked, but after that I ignored him, though he took him long to understand that if I was never calling him, there was a reason....

Oh, and a few months later I met him on the bus and he told me 'hey, you got fatter'...and he insisted in that!!! :mad: :mad: :mad:

Koa

03-14-2004, 12:29 PM

Oh, and the long-distance one when he visited me at Xmas didn't even THINK of getting me a xmas present!!! I hate to be so material, but I needed something concrete from him...and I had spent 2 months in looking for a present for him...it's a way to show care sometimes....

ihrocks

03-14-2004, 12:38 PM

Poor Koa! I am twice your "old" age...trust me, you have many adventures still to come, and not all of them disasters, though a great many of them will be. ;)

But the trick I have learned is, indeed, to live your own life. I know at your "advanced" years everyone in the world seems to have developed a "nesting" instinct and are pairing up two-by-two, but it passes, like acne, boy bands, and the urge to shave your head. It's a phase of life.

Spend your Sundays out in the world. Hit the sidewalks and let life happen to you. Pursue your passions, discover new things to love or to hate, until you become comfortable in your self. But above all else, wait for love. Don't rush, don't hurry, don't panic about becoming an Old Maid. Be patient for love. Once you find the right love, you'll have all the time in the world and beyond to bask in its warmth and wonder.

Only telling you this because I wish with all my heart someone had told me the same thing half a lifetime ago.

ihrocks
The Crossed Keys (http://hometown.aol.com/ihrocks/myhomepage/index.html)

ihrocks

03-14-2004, 12:43 PM

And fool, feel free to follow that advise as well. :)

ihrocks
The Crossed Keys (http://hometown.aol.com/ihrocks/myhomepage/index.html)

Koa

03-14-2004, 01:44 PM

Spend your Sundays out in the world
Tried to, noone had time to come with me, I don't want to go out alone cos it makes me more depressed.

But the trick I have learned is, indeed, to live your own life. I know at your "advanced" years everyone in the world seems to have developed a "nesting" instinct and are pairing up two-by-two, but it passes, like acne, boy bands, and the urge to shave your head. It's a phase of life.

Yeah a phase. Exactly the reason why my crush refused me: he's older, he passed that phase. I'm in the opposite phase.

I'm reading Frankenstein, I feel like the monster, who became evil cos noone loved him...

Thanks ihrocks I know how much of a helpful Mum you are, but I just don't feel I have much time... After years of being down for one reason or other, there's just an urgency of solving it before my brain gets totally screwed...

Sorry 'bout hijacking the thread and my bad habit of spreading depression around the net, but it's Sunday... wish it was Monday lol (who remembers the song? yeah I know it was the opposite...who was it, the Bangles?:D).

amuse

03-14-2004, 01:56 PM

that one stupid (because nobody wants to hear it) cliche is very true - about finding love when you least expect it and have stopped looking. but that's like not being able to breathe and being told relax, and you'll be able to!
i've heard it before and it was so annoying, but turns out it's true. if that helps. also, kind of what ihrocks said, about Sundays, and getting out, yes do it! and learning to be alone with oneself helps. i didn't like to be alone a long time ago (now! i feel old :D) but the ability to do things without company really helps.

and then, voila, you will be a strong lovely and free and another strong lovely person will meet you and fall at your feet and be smitten with you (no he won't be so weird and he'll treat you nicely and you can have wonderful times together!!!)

ihrocks

03-14-2004, 02:14 PM

Originally posted by Koa
Tried to, noone had time to come with me, I don't want to go out alone cos it makes me more depressed.

I'm reading Frankenstein, I feel like the monster, who became evil cos noone loved him...

Thanks ihrocks I know how much of a helpful Mum you are, but I just don't feel I have much time... After years of being down for one reason or other, there's just an urgency of solving it before my brain gets totally screwed...

wish it was Monday lol (who remembers the song? yeah I know it was the opposite...who was it, the Bangles?:D).

A) The key is to go by yourself. There's two essential parts...get out where life can happen to you and do it alone. Learn to be comfortable with your own company, and the only way to learn something (all together now): practice, practice, practice!

B) Start loving yourself, Koa. It sounds like you don't even like yourself too much these days, and there's so much to like.

C) Honey, if you think things are desperate at 20, what do you think is waiting for you at my age!?! :) The urgency is all in your head. It the snooze button and relax! :)

D) Yes, the Bangles..."kissing Valentino by a crystal blue Italian stream," clever line. I always liked it.

You know, between you, me, and azmuse, all this party needs is some Haagen Das! :)

ihrocks
The Crossed Keys (http://hometown.aol.com/ihrocks/myhomepage/index.html)

Koa

03-14-2004, 02:24 PM

some haagen what?

I am so used to being alone with myself, don't worry! I'm more independant and individualist than most girls, as I've alwyas been with myself only... But honestly, noone ever realised I'm made of flesh too...

Amuse, I could strangle you now :D The 'it comes when you less expect it thing' is one of the voidest phrases on earth. Together with the 'you can't just complain about it, get your a** up and do something!' (which I proudly did last week but ddint work...). Can you tell me where's coherence???

it's just that I don't feel like waiting till I'm 40 to be happy...

ihrocks

03-14-2004, 02:39 PM

Haagen Das -- the best chocolate ice cream on the planet and perfect for enjoying right out of the container when you get together with girlfriends to sort out life. :)

Koa, are you familiar with American baseball? In baseball, because it's a boring game and there's not much else to do, they keep copious statistics on things. One of these is called a "batting average" -- the percent of the time a player bats and actually gets to first base. The greatest baseball player of all time had a .400 batting average. A .300 betting average is considered very good. It gets a player girls, shaving ads, and signing bonuses. What that translates into is out of 10 trips to the plate, a player gets on base 3 times. 3 out of 10 is considered fantastic, 4 out of 10 and you're a legend! The lesson to be learned -- keep trying. Not only do you get better with practice, you learn to handle the disappointment in stride.

ihrocks
Great giver of advice, lousy follower of advice. :)
The Crossed Keys (http://hometown.aol.com/ihrocks/myhomepage/index.html)

amuse

03-14-2004, 02:39 PM

here's my neck, strangle it! i told you it's a vile phrase. ;) but please wait till we've had the haagen daaz - thickest creamiest ice cream ever :) :)

amuse

03-14-2004, 02:40 PM

;) talk about timing!!

ihrocks

03-14-2004, 02:46 PM

Did I mention I have a houseful of Girl Scout cookies right now? :)

The go great with ice cream!

ihrocks
The Crossed Keys (http://hometown.aol.com/ihrocks/myhomepage/index.html)

ihrocks

03-14-2004, 02:57 PM

And to get back to fool's request, this happened to a friend of mine, who'd be mortified to know I'm sharing this one, but it's too good not to share.

My friend goes out with this woman, one thing has led to another, and it looks as if he is spending the night. However, the wine goes to her head, her inner evil twin emerges, and things generally go wrong. However, he's now missed the last train home, so he's spending the night, but that's all he's doing. There's no place to sleep but her bed, but absolutely no contact takes place. The next day or so later, he notices he's developed a sort of rash in his nether regions. Closer inspection reveals that he picked up some stowaways from her bedsheets! So date-gone-wrong turns into a two-week ordeal getting rid of, um, "bed bugs" would be the politest way of putting it? :)

ihrocks
The Crossed Keys (http://hometown.aol.com/ihrocks/myhomepage/index.html)

imthefoolonthehill

03-15-2004, 01:23 AM

hmm.... that makes me feel slightly better...

lol... you poor poor people.

Koa

03-15-2004, 04:48 PM

I obviously have to apologise about the pile of crap Sundays make me write (yeah go, blame it on something else :D)

Haagen Das uhm... I suppose it's that American brand... always up for chocolate anyway!

No I have no clue about baseball, it's not exactly popular here and even when I've happened to see some I've enver ever understood anything about it... lol ihrocks, even your explanation was too much for my poor brain, and not only cos I have a headache right now ;)

Just another manic monday...
(the soundtrack of this thread!):D

Isagel

03-18-2004, 05:47 AM

Hey fool, more comfort for you -

I think I once was a really bad date ...
:o :o :o

This is a painful memory , but it might cheer you up. :-)

Back when I was seventeen, my friends decided that I needed a boyfriend. They invite this really nice guy to a party I held. To speed things along they lie and tell him I have a crush on him. I did not know about this datesetup. All of a sudden my guests leave. I´m alone, on a date. I do not know it is a date. He thinks I know. He tries kissing. He´s not very good at it.

Actually he is very bad.
Very.

I run out to my friend who is outside, smoking. I yell - Jennie, help me! - tell him I´m a lesbian! The whole studentdorm where I lived hears this. Jennie, being a helpful friend , goes inside and lies to the guy and tells him I´m a lesbian.

Evrybody laughed at the poor boy - now known as the guy who turned a girl lesbian by trying to kiss her.

Somehow, the rumour about me being lesbian did not work as the date repellant I thought it would.
Strange, I thought.

Two weeks later I had a boyfriend.

Dating moves in mysterious ways.

Isagel

03-18-2004, 09:27 AM

I REALLY hope that confession cheered you up.
Can´t believe I told all of you.
Perhaps I should just edit it out?

Or I could just go on and tell you about that boyfriend. He went to Paris. He phoned me in the middle of the night, telling me about this great gift he bought. Paris + gift! I imagined something really special.

I got a pair of teddybears slippers.
And alot of anecdotes about this beautiful girl he met there, with huge velvetbrown eyes.

He cheated on me and bought me slippers!
It was a good pair of slippers, though. Warm and comfy.

amuse

03-18-2004, 01:29 PM

don't edit please!!! i love that story :D - roflmao! thank you isagel. :D :D

IWilKikU

03-18-2004, 09:04 PM

I went to a conservative christian private highschool, where we didn't have dances cause dancers go to hell!!!! We had banquets. So this girl I reeeeeeally didn't like was the only one to ask me, so I pretty much had to go. Instead of getting her flowers....

I got her a cactus.

She didn't think it was funny.

imthefoolonthehill

03-20-2004, 01:08 AM

Isagel... my god you just made my day.

IWILKIKU... If ever someone I really don't like asks me to Sadies or something... I think I will try that trick.

Isagel

03-20-2004, 07:18 AM

I´m glad. If you ever need more horror stories about dating to cheer you up, just tell me. There is plenty more where that came from :-).

fayefaye

03-21-2004, 03:56 AM

That's a horrible thing to do to someone who you don't like!! and isaqel, that was a good one. :)

Shea

03-22-2004, 02:47 PM

Ok, rather odd I'm posting this today (of all days it's our first anniversary:D ). But it's not really about any one that I dated.

When I was a sophomore in high school, I chaperoned for my sister's eighth grade graduation trip (she attended a private Catholic school). Only a difference of two years, but it was an excuse to go to Disney World for free. Of all days we happened to pick it turned out to be gay day! (I still have problems with Disney because of this considering we had no warning and no apology) Everything would have been ok had people not been behaving in such bizzare fashion. Needless to say all the kids paired off whether or not they were dating so that they could hold hands. Except one little fat boy. He was a very obnoxious, self-centered kid but I still took pity on him and held his hand for the day. I was so exhausted that on the bus ride home I slept ( and I sleep sound!) When I woke up, everyone was looking at me funny. Finally, someone asked me, "Why did you kiss Paul?" Absolutely horrified, I found out that he kissed me on the mouth while I was sleeping!:mad: The next day, all his classmates charged him with water balloons.

baddad

03-27-2004, 12:14 AM

Along the lines of screwed up boys/girls...I once had a wife ask me to choose between her or my children as to who was more important to me. Now my ex-wife and I are just friends. The kids and I had a wonderful life together.

I've twice in my life had women tell me they thought they were falling in love with me.................after only a few dates. Freeeaaky!!! Advice: Until you completely love yourself, no one else can. End of story!

Koa

03-27-2004, 09:45 AM

Originally posted by baddad
Advice: Until you completely love yourself, no one else can. End of story! [/B]
I'm finding out it's probably true...and very, very disturbing!!!
(damn i've been using too much of the word 'disturbing' lately!)

imthefoolonthehill

03-30-2004, 01:57 AM

mmm... I've always heard that its not finding the right person... its being the right person.

simon

03-30-2004, 02:57 AM

I have never been on a date before.

Sancho

03-30-2004, 03:26 AM

OK, I’ve probably been the subject of a few of the “My worst date” tales, and consequently can’t think of any stories where my date was worse than me, so here’s my worst behavior on a date:

A few years back I’m living the high desert of California and I’d just finished a weeklong backpacking trip in the Grand Canyon. Instead of driving straight home, I stop in Vegas and call a friend to see if she’d like to go to a show. Oddly, she sounded happy to hear from me and asked me drop on by. I swung by a truck-stop for a shower (good thinkin’ huh?) and went over to pick her up.
Well, I get to her apartment and find out she’s cooking dinner for us – even better (I can’t believe my good fortune.) It’s coolish in Vegas that night and she’s got this huge log on the fireplace and a couple of wadded up pieces of newspaper underneath it for kindling. I figure right away that ain’t gonna work. So soak that log real good with backpacking stove fuel. I’m about to light it when she comes in and says she wants to light it.
The best description of the lighting of that yule log that I can think of is: “Small Tactical Nuke.” It sucked all of the oxygen out of the apartment and as I was stamping out the carpet I couldn’t help but to notice the smell of burning hair ripe in the air.
It’s hard to keep a straight face when you’re eating dinner with a woman who has no eyebrows. Anyhow, I drove on home that night and I don’t think she ever returned any of my phone calls.

verybaddmom

03-30-2004, 03:46 AM

baddad, how charming you must be to have all those women confess love after few dates!

anyhow, i have known bad dates, but mostly i knew bad marriage. im happily divorced now and refuse to dwell on wasted youth or innocence, as sadly as they will be missed.
instead i choose to celebrate my escape, the person i am now, and the future i will enjoy.

all of you still on that road...keep at it, it does get better. love thyself. that could not be more true (or trite i know!)

emily655321

03-30-2004, 06:33 AM

I still haven't decided if this was a date or not, but it's the closest I've come. I was 15 and my older bro's friend asked me if we could go out in secret so my brother wouldn't know, which was all dangerous and romantic and he was a goth rocker type so I, being a kid, was like, "whoo hoo!" So a few weeks later he asked if I'd go to a party, and I was like, "ooh, a party! never been to a party." And so we went... and it turned out to be this preppy girl's birthday party. I didn't know a single person, and everyone but me and the guy was wearing Abercrombie and Fitch clothes, and they played volleyball and swam in the pool and listened to rap. I was sooooo out of place, it was mortifying. (We did all end up singing "Bohemian Rhapsody" the whole way through, though, which was really fun.)

We didn't go on any other dates, and he moved away, and that's the first and last time I had a boyfriend! I'm such a loser :p

simon

03-30-2004, 02:44 PM

Move over, I lay claim to the looser title, but I enjoy reading of others strife nonetheless.

Koa

03-31-2004, 06:07 AM

*joins the losers team but avoids moaning more than she already did in this very thread*

kilted exile

03-31-2004, 11:58 PM

HA! my immense loser qualities outshine all of you. As of today I am 22years,3months & 3days old and not once in my entire life has any girl said more than about 10 words to me (in case your interested those words are normally "Go away, why would I ever go out with you.")

emily655321

04-01-2004, 12:10 AM

*gasp* and you say you live in North America? What girl wouldn't fall head over heels for that cute Glaswegian accent? Lived in Fife for a year, and that's the one thing I miss most. :D

kilted exile

04-01-2004, 12:26 AM

Originally posted by emily655321
*gasp* and you say you live in North America? What girl wouldn't fall head over heels for that cute Glaswegian accent? Lived in Fife for a year, and that's the one thing I miss most. :D
The accent works ok, until they actually see me that is, then it doesnt make any difference anymore.

simon

04-01-2004, 03:17 AM

Just don't ever use the, "want to do a study group?" answered by "okay, whose in it?" and then "Just you and me" approach. It gets a laugh and that's about it.
Just work that accent, try American girls they fall for accents like the fake melted cheese they are.

emily655321

04-01-2004, 06:04 AM

LOL thanks wise guy. Like I haven't heard a million guys fawn over some foreign actress or model. ;)

Koa

04-01-2004, 06:17 AM

Originally posted by kilted exile
HA! my immense loser qualities outshine all of you. As of today I am 22years,3months & 3days old and not once in my entire life has any girl said more than about 10 words to me (in case your interested those words are normally "Go away, why would I ever go out with you.")

Know the feeling... 22 years and 13 days old, and a screwed long-distance relationship is all I have on my list... Though I'm currently acting like a teenager chasing a 30-year-old who has already proved not to give a damn about me... :D Just cos I'm in a good mood (sort of) today, or I'd be moaning as usual now...

Lara

04-01-2004, 07:51 AM

Hey guys, I truly believe there is someone out there for everyone. Unfortunaltely, it seems, the harder you try, the harder it is to get. Relax, just be yourself, because you wouldn't want someone who doesn't accept you for who you are anyway. :D

Shea

04-01-2004, 11:03 AM

I second that Lara! Just get to know someone first, things will fall into place.

And Koa, my husband and I had been dating for over a month before I found out he's 10 years older than me! :) (I'm currently 23)

Koa

04-10-2004, 11:38 AM

and?
(today i'm not in the mood for hearing about happy love stories).

There are so many people in the world that i can't even express the number in English... How is it possible to find the good one? They all tell you this crap about not looking for it... then they tell you to stop complaining and do something about it... All crap. Only luck matters. I wonder when mine will come, cos I feel so old that if I wait any longer I'll be too ancient to enjoy anything.

fayefaye

04-11-2004, 11:13 AM

95% of the population is completely undatable. :D

as for me, I like the idea of being a crazy ol' cat lady, 'KEEP OFF THE ****ING GRASS!!!' You've gotta like being alone. :)

emily655321

04-12-2004, 03:33 AM

Go cat ladies! I'm gonna be one too; the way I see it, my life from this point on will progress thusly: College>street artist>lack of income>mounting debts>foreclosure and auctioning of all property>bag lady>unforseen salvation of some kind>cat lady>cat lady rotting alone in shack.

All I hope for is that when I'm a bag lady I have a cool floppy hat, and when I'm a cat lady small children will think I'm a witch and dare each other to touch my house :D

fayefaye

04-17-2004, 05:42 AM

LOL. I imagine myself following a very similar path

amuse

04-17-2004, 02:19 PM

this morning i dreamt about a fat, fluffy, grey cat smiling at me from my arms, and signs on the outside of a house telling me just where to touch her - her left foot, left leg. woke up instantly, soooooooooooooooooo quietly thrilled.
i think my favorite cat's returning.

IWilKikU

04-17-2004, 08:24 PM

Don't get too excited Amuse, I'm telling you guys cats are spies. Yours collected the info that it needed and is now revealing everything to the malignant demon that sent it on its mission in the first place. Your as good as doomed! :(

simon

04-17-2004, 09:33 PM

Kik cats are spawn of the devil, lurking about in unwanted places changeing to black just so they can smother you with bad luck, and stealthy creeping around at night trying to get run over by cars. Yet, I wouldn't mind being a cat lady myself, at least I'd know I'd be with like kind, sneaky and evil.

amuse

04-17-2004, 10:18 PM

:( Oh!! No!! i'm in love with narks!!

aren't they soft, cuddly, adorable little sphinxes, though. *sighs "beauteously" :)

emily655321

04-17-2004, 11:28 PM

Cats aren't the spawn or minion of anything...and even if they were, they certainly wouldn't bother to rifle through tax statements and report back to him. :p They's just lovely, soft, smelly, pointy, and they make millions of pretty little chirrup-y noises. They use you for their own selfish, demonic purposes and then scratch your eyes out the second they change their mind, and you still adore them and talk about them endlessly. What's not to love? :D

verybaddmom

04-17-2004, 11:36 PM

i have always felt that i should have been a cat, or that perhaps i am part cat. that is not to say that i am some sort of demonic spawn, but that i absolutely love being free to laze around the house, alternately napping and grooming. I also have often wished that i had the ability to purr. there are just some occasions that on's emotions can only be expressed with a purr...

*meow*

btw, i have a cat named snickers (short for snicklefritz, damn the big comfy couch) that has closed in on the world's record for largest cat (currently he's 22 lbs). he's a maine coon, and he's been with us for 8 years, and i have often thought that it is a good thing he doesnt speak to us, as he knows all my secrets.
i also know that he has more personality than some people that i know....

Sancho

04-18-2004, 05:47 PM

We’ve got a Siamese mix pound kitty named Bruno (He came with that name, and it seems to fit.) He just keeps getting fatter and happier. The other day I was admiring a couple of Canadian Geese who were hanging out by my house, when who should launch himself from his hiding spot but “Bruno-Mighty-Hunter-Mighty-Fighter.” I never knew he could get all that lard moving that fast. I also didn’t know he could still do a somersault until I watched the Geese give him a face shot. I literally fell down on the ground laughing.

IWilKikU

04-18-2004, 09:04 PM

Cats... eew.... <shudders>

amuse

04-18-2004, 09:16 PM

i refuse to live on planets that don't have cats ;)

emily655321

04-19-2004, 05:42 AM

I refuse to live on more than one planet at a time, regardless of the feline population. :p

Speaking of chubby kitties, though, I feel so bad for cats who are allowed to get really really really fat. Our kitty is a couple of pounds overweight because he got depressed and inactive when the new kitten came, but he'll lose it once they start running around outside together this spring. Last fall we got this cat at the shelter who was more than double his/her ideal weight -- the vet couldn't even tell what its gender was because of all the fat. For the first week I was too grossed out to even look at or touch her, but she was the most loving thing in the world and a young couple who volunteer with the dogs took her home to foster until she's healthy enough to be adopted. I still think about that poor tick-cat.

Sancho

04-19-2004, 11:07 AM

Bruno’s not really fat; he’s just big-boned. I’m here to tell you that it is physically impossible to put him on a diet. When Bruno is displeased with his dietary intake his volume control goes haywire. Here’s his routine: He hauls his fat butt outta bed at around 4AM and eats a can of kitty tuna, then he eats the skinny cat’s can of food, then he starts in on the doggy kibble. Then he usually grows weary of his surroundings and being the social animal that he is, he saunters over to the neighbor’s house where he has a harem of admiring girl kitties. He allows them to nuzzle him for a while then he cleans out their kitty-food bowls. (which reminds me, I need to take the neighbors another bag of cat food) Then he usually finds a sunny spot in the yard and sleeps until he’s hungry again.

Koa

04-19-2004, 04:07 PM

oooh come on with these cats... I'm forced to stand the presence of a cat since my parents agreed to get one after my brother insisted... well now after 6 months I'm a bit more used to it, but it wasnt the dream of my life to have someone who scratches on my bedroom's door at 6 am on saturday, or who has this passion for passing through your legs while you walk so you squeeze him...or who would make even a bigger mess than it really is of my room if I ever allowed him to get in... I'm a bit intolerant yes but we live in a flat (apartment for you Americans ;)) and sometimes it gets too narrow for the whole family!!! :mad:

IWilKikU

04-19-2004, 07:02 PM

Ah, its refreshing to find another non-cat-person on here from time to time.

emily655321

04-20-2004, 12:02 AM

Okay, okay, this is the last of my cat posts (mumbleonthisthreadmumble).

Originally posted by Sancho
Bruno’s not really fat; he’s just big-boned. I’m here to tell you that it is physically impossible to put him on a diet. When Bruno is displeased with his dietary intake his volume control goes haywire.

It's okay, Sancho, my last cat was a chub too. Some, like plenty of people, just have an emotional attachment to food. Mine would cry pitifully until you actually went to the bowl with him and petted him while he ate -- the entire time, or he'd start over crying again. But then there's those old ladies who think obese cats are cute and feed them cream and people tuna and anything else they want all the time. That's just misguided affection (and if you've seen the results, a form of abuse, i.m.o.). It's tough not to do absolutely anything for that little face, though.

verybaddmom

04-20-2004, 12:12 AM

love the mumbling, em...i do that all the time, although mine is slightly more homer-esque in nature:

...dammumblekidsgrumblenorespectmumblethinkimheret odotheirbiddingmumblegrumbelittlebeastsgrumble...

and i will do that the whole time i do the dishes or pick up stray socks and bits of laundry from all over the house after he has had a sleepover at our house...

fayefaye

04-20-2004, 01:40 AM

Originally posted by simon
Kik cats are spawn of the devil, lurking about in unwanted places changeing to black just so they can smother you with bad luck, and stealthy creeping around at night trying to get run over by cars. Yet, I wouldn't mind being a cat lady myself, at least I'd know I'd be with like kind, sneaky and evil.

lol, yes, that's the general idea. :)

simon

04-20-2004, 02:04 PM

Evil prevails in all places.

emily655321

04-21-2004, 04:05 AM

Especially Arby's.

Sancho

04-21-2004, 11:56 AM

Bruno's not really evil, he's just big-boned.

emily655321

04-21-2004, 03:04 PM

Like Cartman :D

Sancho

04-22-2004, 11:47 AM

I've never thought of it before, but they do have remarkably similar personalities:

“Do not dispute my authoritaa.”

emily655321

04-22-2004, 04:22 PM

Hehehe. *pictures a Cartman kitty*

I like your new siggy, by the way.

Sancho

04-28-2004, 10:33 AM

Thanks Em. I’d just watched “Blues Brothers” on VH-1 so it was fresh in my mind. That was Jake begging Carrie Fisher to spare his life. The funniest part of that scene is Elwood, “Who is that woman!?”

Anyhow, Blues Bro’s is my one claim to fame. I had a bit part in the movie. OK, it wasn’t really a bit part, it was more like I was in a crowd scene. OK, I’ve never actually been able pick myself out of the crowd in that scene. OK, OK, OK, I was just driving by during the filming of it. My one claim to fame – tragic.

emily655321

04-28-2004, 04:31 PM

Hehehe. :D

My dad was a teenager in Munich I believe...or Nurnburg... wherever it was filmed... when he read a tiny ad in the paper for a casting call for a new movie, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (or is the movie the one that's Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory? I always get them mixed up). Anyway, he didn't go audition or anything, but he never fails to mention it and point out buildings when it's on TV, and that's a way smaller claim to fame. Congrats on yours! :D

IWilKikU

04-28-2004, 09:21 PM

My claim to fame is that I saw Sean Connery getting his shoes shined in Ragen International Airport! :D:D Do I win? :D

emily655321

04-29-2004, 11:36 AM

Only if you stole a piece of his luggage when he wasn't looking.

Shea

04-29-2004, 11:52 AM

Martin Sheen (is that how you spell it?) said "hi" back to me when I passed him walking on a NY street.

verybaddmom

04-30-2004, 05:02 AM

Claim to fame....good topic for a new thread...hmmmm

imthefoolonthehill

05-02-2004, 02:53 AM

on a radio station, I heard this guy talk about a girl he took to a concert... and the lead singer asked her backstage... and he never saw her again... a few weeks later he went to her house and she had moved...

emily655321

05-02-2004, 05:06 PM

Lucky girl. :D Do you remember what band it was?
(omg, was it Nine Inch Nails?? Do you think I stand a chance? :p)

random_hero

05-02-2004, 05:47 PM

Yeah, american girls fall for accents and hair. If you are overweight, go get your hair... done. Chicks really dont care about your personality either. My experience with girls is... none. They tell me Im hot, and then I eventually have to tell them Im a virgin and the giggle and tell me its not going to work out. Prom is coming up though...
And I have never had a girlfriend because I really havent found a girl that I genuinely want to hang out with and that is attractive to me and attracted to me. So thats a problem. I did like a girl in elemenmtary school who screamed that she hated me and thought I was gross in 4th grade in front of the whole class. Im convinced that this is where all of my troubles with the female kind come from.

emily655321

05-02-2004, 06:04 PM

LOL RH, I've never had a boyfriend either. Unless you count the experience I posted earlier in this thread, which I don't. It seems like the stereotype of "brains or beauty" holds true sometimes; you can have both, but you'll only be recognized for one. I was always the smart girl, not the girl people dated. So now, I don't have a clue how to be the kind of girl people date. Old ladies tell me "the boys will notice you when they're more mature," and guys my age tell me I'm frigid. And if anyone I like actually shows interest in me, I laugh it off because I worry that they're just being friendly or worse, trying to tease me. So I'm afraid of putting my self-esteem on the line -- it's low enough as it is. And sometimes, when I'm convinced someone likes me back, I actually lose interest in them altogether. Like an "I'd never belong to a club that would have me as a member" sort of thing.

So don't worry. You're not alone. And P.S., I didn't have a date for the prom. And I won't lie to you, it sucked. But on another note, my dad was a hot guy and he didn't have a girlfriend till he met my mom, the year after he graduated HS. So it isn't like the clock is ticking, you know? You're still a teenager.

IWilKikU

05-02-2004, 07:06 PM

Hero, don't worry. There are some girls out there, although they may be few and far between, that arn't as shallow as the mob. Bad expirience when you were younger though. Ouch! :eek:. But don't worry about it. Just let them come to you. The only girl that I've dated for more than 3 months came to me. Today is our 2 year 10 month aniversary. I always thought it was up to me to show the innitiative to go out and pick myself a woman, but in reallity, we don't pick them. They pick us. So just be patient. :)

Emily, with your wit and wisdom there is NO reason for you to have a low self-esteem. My girlfriend has a low esteem too, and she is super hot/smart/fun/ect..., you get the picture, but she's got no self esteem and its super frustraiting. And waiting until the boys are more mature isn't necasarily a bad thing. That way your sure to get a good one. But trust me... in the grown up world, people don't act interested just to tease you. If you never let anyone who shows any interest in you actually get to know you, how do you expect to find who you're looking for???

Don't worry you two... happiness awaits!...
...someday. :)

emily655321

05-02-2004, 07:10 PM

Thanks, Kik. You're in a super effing good mood today, aren't you? :D :D

IWilKikU

05-02-2004, 07:28 PM

Friday was my last day of classes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What do you think???

Although I still have finals and one more essay :(

emily655321

05-02-2004, 07:34 PM

Same with my best bud. Pierce your lip, that's what she did.
I dunno. :D I'm supposed to make sense all of a sudden?

random_hero

05-03-2004, 01:19 AM

I have a date for prom, and she is by far the most beautiful girl that has walked the earth, but she doesnt like me, like that at least. And OMFG, the whole, laugh-off-the-flirtacious-come-on-cuz-how-could-anyone-like-me-thing, that is my life story, so maybe this is the case with this girl. But then again she always flirts with a guy who sits behind me in econ, and im sitting right there. So, either she likes to play a bunch of guys at once, cuz there is another guy she has been talking to on the phone, or she just likes me as a freind. But she asked ME to prom, so...

I ****ING CANNOT STAND THIS BULL**** ANYMORE!!!!! ****ING *******!!!

random_hero

05-03-2004, 01:20 AM

DID I HAVE TO... oh sorry... Did I have to put the asterisk things there or does the site do it for us? I just hate counting the things out...

imthefoolonthehill

05-03-2004, 01:53 AM

I don't remember... they were touring with Ozzy a while back.

simon

05-03-2004, 02:44 PM

kik I'd like to say that I understand how you feel. But be wary of what you do on your last day. For on mine I did a cartwheel(well tried) and ended up careening into the bathroom door and witnessing a row of guys peeing while I was lying upsidown on the tiles. This is not something that should be seen. And I'll have you know that I was not drunk, just my ususal unbalanced self.

Koa

05-03-2004, 04:25 PM

don't believe a word of what Kik said. It's all optimistic crap. Prepare for delusions, cos that's what life is. you'll keep thinking luck just HAS TO turn and be kind on you, but it might never happen.

*feels a bit like abdo, but that's what life taught me. I won't chnage my mind until I'm proven wrong by facts*

At least you have dates or whatever before the age of 20, so that might be a start not to become a bitter spinster like me.

IWilKikU

05-03-2004, 07:23 PM

Ok, fine Koa, rather than trying to spread optimism, hows this:

You guys are screwed. There's only one perfect girl in the whole world and I got her, so eff off! And there's only one perfect guy in the world, and thats me. I live in a different country than most of you, so you all have no chance! My girlfriend and I are the only people in the world who are capable of achiving happiness. HA!

emily655321

05-04-2004, 05:46 AM

Aw, no, don't come over to the dark side, Kik. :p
I like your delusional optimism. It creates a sort of cosmic balance. :D

simon

05-04-2004, 01:42 PM

Stay with the dark forces mighty one, they are an allowance, a back up, perhaps an alibi for inane, stipud, and rude comments, do you detect the sarcasm?

Koa

05-04-2004, 03:48 PM

doesn't seem to be like that Kik, 99% of the people around me are like that.
that's when i wonder what's so wrong with me, and what makes me scream my delusion around.

verybaddmom

05-04-2004, 04:18 PM

"You guys are screwed. There's only one perfect girl in the whole world and I got her, so eff off! And there's only one perfect guy in the world, and thats me. I live in a different country than most of you, so you all have no chance! My girlfriend and I are the only people in the world who are capable of achiving happiness. HA!"

Kik, you poor deluded fellow....didnt you realize that i am the only perfect girl in the world, and the only perfect guy is the one that i am with? i mean after all, its only fitting that he and i end up together!

you guys just need to relax...i was thirty before i met the one for me...and i really am quite the catch! patience......is a pain in the butt...but it really is a virtue