A Nation Divided

[num1speedoman]

Hey y'all I'm new to the site and writing poetry. I love writing songs and found out i like writing poetry. Anyways I just finished this one today and hoping ya could give me some critiques and advice to make it better - its just in its rough draft!

A Nation Now Divided?

A Nation now divided over means of war
Peace, one, and stability now have lost the scores
Were We destined for failure –
When means at home defer the attention from the foe

No parading in the streets or national festivities
Just grim reprieving doubt: essence of defeat
They give their lives’ for Us
In vain, or in hope – do We divest?

A Nation now divided over means of war
No respect for authority
Selfish opinions succeed over unity
Unity underscored by forlorn

Once great, rising power
Now a fluctuating hoax
With two groups fighting with little regard for the mass
Are We what We were?

Is democracy so wrong?
No other one should have
If it means a little sacrifice
And charitable egalitarianism

Everyone predicting – hoping for – failure
Countries waiting for upset
Will we disappoint or rupture doubt and win
Fate lies within us – do we bite our tongues and merge

As One We hold the power
Two We cannot win
America holds the future
Stand strong or give in?

A Nation now divided over means of war
With security threatened are we entitled to let go
Has everyone lost the spark to blaze in glory –
Or is this the beginning of one frightening story!

[num1speedoman]

I'm sorry for taking up space, but I just found my old poem. This one really speaks to me. Please tell me what you think. I'm still debating on the title I don't really like this one.;)

Insecure

Tonight my friends I say goodbye as I let the blood run dryyy. And though I know you’ll be sad to see me go. But you gotta know I’m gone. Yes I’m already gone. Through thick and thin you have always been by my side. But I have to let the rest of this blood run dry. Goodbye. Goodbyee.

I have little, little of friends little hope little of anything please help me cope. Though many have passed noone has tried to take a look inside. I’m just there. A shadow to be walked upon.
A window of despair. No ones there to lift me up or hold me when I cry. Why should I try. O why should I try.

Now you must know that I do love u so. But your love was the only love. It may have conquered much but not all. Now without any more I must fall. I must leave. Please don’t grieve I love you so. But I got to go.

Tonight my friends I say goodbye as I let the last of this blood run dryyy. And though I know you’ll be sad to see me go. But you gotta know I’m gone. Yes I’m already gone. Through thick and thin you have always been by my side. But I have to let the rest of this blood run dry. Goodbye. Goodbyee.

I’ve laughed with you not cried,
This burning in me won’t die
Goodbye