Common Haiku (shared haiku's little sibling)

[B-Mental]

I came across the idea for a common haiku after many people have posted at the same time. I was thinking how many different ways one haiku line can lead the direction of the haiku.

Rules similar to shared haiku, except the first line of a haiku will be used for the next 10 posts. Posts 1-5 will have the same first line, and then the 6th, 11th, 16th, 21st, 26th...(you get the idea) poster will pick one of the final lines from above and we will use it for the next 5 haiku. I'm not sure if this will work, but here goes...


Watching out window
My Schedule Now Rearranged
Snowflakes Falling down.

Now changing the first line in the thread every fifth post...don't forget, thanks
B-M -2/20/07

[zanna]

Watching out window
keeps me very occupied
waiting for the train.

Like the idea, B! Cound me in :)

[B-Mental]

thanks zanna, I've been thinking about it for a couple days before I posted it. I hope it works.

Watching out Window
Mischief heading towards me
Sleep comes fitfully

[Pensive]

Watching out window
Looking at the lovely trees
Waiting for the rain

:D

Good idea, B-Mental.

[RobinHood3000]

Watching out window
Ten stories above the ground
Waiting for rescue

[Laindessiel]

Watching out the window
I hear him sing. Brought a rose.
Finally, we kiss.

http://www.cosgan.de/images/smilie/traurig/d040.gif

[dramasnot6]

Aww that was sweet lain! :)

Watching out the window
Unaware of their proud grins
Her first day of school

[brainstrain]

Yikes! You people confused me. There is no "the" in "Watching out window". Haha, several posts before me got off. Silly smart people...

Watching out window
I shall sit and think and sigh
For days long since past...

[B-Mental]

Watching out window
torrents obscure setting sun
cleansing the terrain

[Laindessiel]

Sorry to befuzzle my dear Alien! I started the confusion, sorry!

Watching out window
There I can see him, staring.
Then I saw tears flow.

[Poetess]

There I can see him, staring
Lustfully at a friendly widow
Whose life wasn`t ever suspecious

[RobinHood3000]

Erm, Poetess...the premise of a haiku is that its three lines have syllable counts of 5-7-5.

[Whifflingpin]

There I can see him,
Staring eyes, wild as whirlpools,
Circus clowns passing.

.

[Laindessiel]

There I can see him
Dark clouds roaming and twisting.
All celphones are banned?

[Pensive]

There I can see him
Without realizing my presence
Staring out in the sea

[Laindessiel]

Wow. Really in a pensive mood today, Pense?

There I can see him
His eyes of silver and gold
With the depth of sea.

[B-Mental]

There I can see him
hollow reflection wavers
Across wishing well

[dramasnot6]

There i can see him
Self-portraits tell many tales
Mirror reflection

[zanna]

There I can see him
wish he was really here -- I'm
just imagining.

[RobinHood3000]

There I can see him
Square in the sights of my bow
Start running, target.

[dramasnot6]

Looks like we have 10 on that last one...hope im doing this right....

Start running, target
Poison tipped Cupid's arrows
Defeat me at last

[Laindessiel]

Start running, target
Wars, rages, metal swords. Blood.
Came out from behind.

[zanna]

Start running, target:
where's the thrill of the hunt if
you don't get away?

[Laindessiel]

Start running, target
High-flying Nazguls swoop down.
Print and scroll your screen.

[B-Mental]

Start running, target
the timer has begun, go
You hide and I seek

[zanna]

Start running, target.
You still have the chance to shake
off the hunter, prey.

[zanna]

Start running, target.
how do you expect to win
if ya don't hurry?

[SlaserX]

Start running, target,
Shoot through the trees and valleys,
Life will pass you by,

[seasong]

Start running, target,
South America's safety
when you mess with law.

[zanna]

Yay, ten!

When you mess with law
you could wind up getting burned,
as they sometimes say.

[dramasnot6]

When you mess with law
The dripping of rusty pipes
Resonates regret

[B-Mental]

When you mess with the law
scheming maneuvers of flight
your only escape

[Janine]

Resonates regret
hidden within, thus negates
Your only escape.


I fixed it - not sure it really worked though - was my best try.

[B-Mental]

The point of this thread is to use the same first line for 10 entries and then change it. It is to see how the same line can be taken in different directions.

There should be no reason to fix, but now I will fix your fix

When you mess with the law
hidden within, thus negates
I will fix your fix

[zanna]

when you mess with law,
keep justice on your side. Have
courage. Fight to win.

[B-Mental]

you mess with the law
when you disagree with it
the law don't forget

[Riesa]

you mess with the law
and flaunt indescrepencies
ex-patriot thieves

[zanna]

when you mess with law,
lives are affected: sometimes
worse, sometimes better

[B-Mental]

I started this thread, thinking we'd get a little more activity. Maybe we should change the line every fifth post. I'm going to change it in the first line of the thread. Next change comes up on 40th post....

You mess with the law
You better bring a big gun
No place left to run.

[zanna]

Woo, I'm tenth again!

No place left to run
she stood her ground, stared 'em down.
what is the next move?

[B-Mental]

No place left to run
lava from stromboli comes
should have left sooner.

[zanna]

I like it, B. ^

No place left to run
once one succeeds in reaching
the final finish line

[B-Mental]

thanks Zanna

No place left to run
Sun sets on dying species
The coming of Man

[vin1391]

No Place to run
I sat down on the long road
Staring at the bus.

[Il Penseroso]

Staring at the bus
inmates wish for token fun
to dissolve the place.

[B-Mental]

Staring at the bus
weary passengers embark
towards open road

[B-Mental]

Staring at the bus
Bon Voyage, young traveller
Wishing I was you.

[vin1391]

Staring at the bus
I yawn and see if it came
But no it had not.

[B-Mental]

staring at the bus
broken down along the road
passengers waiting

[Uncle Lar]

Towards open road
I walk with impatient steps;
I hope the bus comes.


From an earlier post:

"Now changing the first line in the thread every fifth post...don't forget, thanks."
(B-Mental)

[B-Mental]

towards open road
rebels stealthily await
to ambush target

yes, well done Uncle Lar and welcome to the forums.

[Uncle Lar]

Towards open road
I go, with heightened senses
and fatigued footsteps.

[B-Mental]

towards open road
moonlight casts lonely shadows
grasses blown by wind

[Uncle Lar]

Towards open road,
I suddenly hear something;
it makes me shiver.


This is the fifth post beginning with "Towards open road."
I believe the next five posts should begin with "It makes me shiver."

- Uncle Lar

[Bluemauvey]

Towards open road,
I suddenly hear something;
it makes me shiver.


This is the fifth post beginning with "Towards open road."
I believe the next five posts should begin with "It makes me shiver."

- Uncle Lar

It can start with any of the last lines from the previous 5 posts Uncle Lar old bean.

[Bluemauvey]

Grasses blown by wind
Were once the smallest of seeds
Out of the winds reach

[Uncle Lar]

Grasses blown by wind
flowing at high speed with strength,
power, and passion.


Thank you for your thoughts, Bluemauvey, Old Bean.
:thumbs_up

Sincerely,

Uncle Lar

[SleepyWitch]

Grasses blown by wind
past the smoothly plastered walls
in clear morning air

(hope i did it right, it's my first ever haiku. and YES, plastered is only 2 syllables)

[Il Penseroso]

Grasses blown by wind
the slope and leaning bend,
circular bandstand.

[B-Mental]

It can start with any of the last lines from the previous 5 posts Uncle Lar old bean.
Quite right

In clear morning air
stars demure to rising sun
songbirds chirp, "Arise!"

[Bluemauvey]

In clear morning air
The firing squad as a man
Scorched the paper heart

[hyperinsomnia]

Scorched the paper heart
and then turned it into art;
recognised at last.

[Bluemauvey]

Haikus that rhyme :(

[Uncle Lar]

In clear morning Air,
the vast, blue Sky awakens
me to face Today.

:thumbs_up

[B-Mental]

scorched the paper heart
never judge a book by its
flamability

[Uncle Lar]

Wait a Minute. What
happened to the following
Haiku Posting Rule?

Now changing the first line in the thread every fifth post...don't forget, thanks
B-M -2/20/07[/QUOTE]

[B-Mental]

scorched the paper heart
rules are never understood
so I say "FORWARD"

I aplogise, I just changed it one early was distracted by hyperinsomnia

[Uncle Lar]

Scorched the paper Heart;
with an enlightening Flame
so fierce and graceful.

[Uncle Lar]

Scorched the paper Heart
with Passion, Tenacity,
and Higher Pleasures.
:thumbs_up
-----------------------------------
Please have a very
safe and Happy Holiday
Weekend, Everyone!

Sincerely,

Uncle Lar

[B-Mental]

scorched the paper heart
furnace incinerating
lost love's unsent notes

[Uncle Lar]

So fierce and graceful
other people can be with
power and wisdom.

[B-Mental]

so fierce and graceful
moonlight bathed the predator
stalking the jungle

[Uncle Lar]

So fierce and graceful
I felt, after I won the
race set before me!

[Uncle Lar]

So fierce and graceful
on my Happy Birthday am
I today; Yahoo!
-----------------------------------------

"Carpe Diem!"

Have a great Day, Everyone!

Sincerely,

Uncle Lar

[srpbritlit]

So fierce and graceful,
Cheetah is chasing Gazelle
She no longer lives

[Uncle Lar]

She no longer lives
in my heart, since she bit a
huge chunk out of it!

[Lote-Tree]

She lives
But there is a Love-Shaped Hole
In my Soul.

[Uncle Lar]

She no longer lives
in pain, but in bliss, since she
is in love with me.

------------------------------
Lote-Tree, your Haiku does not match the common Haiku formula of 5-7-5 syllables. Also, please be sure to follow the rules in this Thread:

"Rules similar to shared Haiku, except the first line of a Haiku will be used for the next 5 posts. Posts 1-5 will have the same first line, and then the 6th Poster will pick one of the final lines from above and we will use it for the next 5 Haiku."

[Lote-Tree]

She no longer lives
in pain, but in bliss, since she
is in love with me.

------------------------------
Lote-Tree, your Haiku does not match the common Haiku formula of 5-7-5 syllables. Also, please be sure to follow the rules in this Thread:

"Rules similar to shared Haiku, except the first line of a Haiku will be used for the next 5 posts. Posts 1-5 will have the same first line, and then the 6th Poster will pick one of the final lines from above and we will use it for the next 5 Haiku."

Lar, Rules noted and understood. Accept my apologies.

[Uncle Lar]

She no longer lives
in the real world for him, but
exists in his heart.

[B-Mental]

exists in his heart
joyful cathedral of love
young and in passion

[kilted exile]

exists in his heart
pangs of sorrow and regret
chances untaken

[B-Mental]

exists in his heart
devoid of light, impure, black,
corrupt, soulful hate

[Uncle Lar]

Exists in his heart,
mind, soul, strength, thought, word, deed, breath,
body, and spirit.

[Uncle Lar]

Exists in his heart
of Joy, since Enlightenment
is so forthcoming!

Have a great Weekend!

Sincerely,

Uncle Lar

[B-Mental]

Chances untaken
haunt the ether of dream land
attacking its shores

[B-Mental]

Chances untaken
past paths deposit players
in your here and now

[hyperinsomnia]

attacking it's shores
The most dreaded, most callous,
with no sympathy

[Uncle Lar]

Chances untaken,
people forsaken, am I
mistaken? No way!

[B-Mental]

Chances untaken
reminesce the heartbreakin
swiss cheese and bacon

DANG! Onkel Lar you got me rhymin.

[Nightshade]

Mistaken? No way
The question will creep in
Did I do right

[Uncle Lar]

Chances untaken,
life goes on with my regrets;
I will do better!

--------------------------------------------
Please be sure to follow the rules in this Thread:

"Rules similar to shared Haiku, except the first line of a Haiku will be used for the next 5 posts. Posts 1-5 will have the same first line, and then the 6th Poster will pick one of the final lines from above and we will use it for the next 5 Haiku."

:thumbs_up

[B-Mental]

Probably my bad, I told Night to change it on the 1st and 6th and that was the 91st. so we can go with it.

Mistaken, no way
one would never believe it
Moi? make a mistake?

[Uncle Lar]

Mistaken? No way
am I mistaken; I like
to solve Mysteries.

[zanna]

Mistaken? No way!
Seeing is believing, right?
could have sworn I saw . . .

[Uncle Lar]

Mistaken? No way!
Life is as it is; not what
we think it should be.

[Uncle Lar]

To solve Mysteries,
one must exude patience and
persistence always.

[B-Mental]

To solve mysteries,
attention to small details,
question everything

[Uncle Lar]

Question everything,
answer anyone wisely,
and you can enrich!

[Uncle Lar]

And you can enrich
yourself and others just by
being yourself well!

:thumbs_up

[Uncle Lar]

Being yourself well
and respecting others can
create Influence.

[zanna]

wah? Uncle Lar, not only are you playing all by yourself :( which is a bummer, but isn't this the Common Haiku? Doesn't it change every five, not all the time? Hoo, where is that emoticon that spins its head around when you need it? Lol.

[Uncle Lar]

My Apologies,
somehow I lost track of the
posting order. Oops!

:(

[AdoreroDio]

My apologies
are not quite enough for some
do you accept it?

[zanna]

My apologies
could never undo the harm
of my cruel words.

sigh. sad when these things are true like that . . .

[ejarg7]

Of my cruel words
Sometimes unintentional
But oh, words can hurt

[Uncle Lar]

My Apologies,
Confusion runs rampant; oh,
the Humanity!

[B-Mental]

My apologies
I'm gonna try to restart
this confus-ed thread



Remember to keep the first line and changing it on posts ending with 1 or 6

[Uncle Lar]

The Humanity
Which was a part of our lives
Seems to disappear.

[kiz_paws]

The Humanity
involved to just get along
was reduced to naught



"Rules similar to shared Haiku, except the first line of a Haiku will be used for the next 5 posts. Posts 1-5 will have the same first line, and then the 6th Poster will pick one of the final lines from above and we will use it for the next 5 Haiku."

How the hey did I miss this?!

[kiz_paws]

The Humanity
was lost along the journey
along with my heart

[B-Mental]

The Humanity
overflowed the riverbanks
seeking lower ground

[kiz_paws]

The Humanity --
wide eyes gaze while whimpers heard.
Such trust in doctors.


Last of the "the Humanity". Next poster, pick one of the above five haiku final lines and commence with the next series of 5.

[don't mean to be bossy, just repeating the how-to's for this, and if I am mistaken, B, you can kick me one] :p

[B-Mental]

I think you've got it Kiz.

Maybe we should ask people to number them.
#1.

Along with my heart
She stole my money, children
dog, car, and respect.

[kiz_paws]

#2

Along with my heart
my eyes drink to thee only
lost in the passion

[B-Mental]

#3

Along with my heart
My Destination unknown
I sought my promise

[kiz_paws]

#4

Along with my heart
my brain ceases functioning
from only a glimpse

[B-Mental]

#5

Along with my heart
She bought a loaf of fresh bread
An appetizer.

[zanna]

Umm,

#1
An appetizer
he served, a dazz'ling smile. A
sign of things to come?

[kiz_paws]

#2
An appetizer
silken dress caught in the breeze
laughter is music

[zanna]

Oooh, I like it, kiz.

#3
An appetizer
the teacher claimed; later we'd
read the hard, dense stuff.

[kiz_paws]

#4
An appetizer
was what the first kiss brought me
my life is my feast

[thank-you zanna, this is great fun!] ;)

[AdoreroDio]

#5
An appetizer
so delectably sweeter
when it is sugar

[barbara0207]

# 1

Sign of things to come -
the sky as dark as your brow -
take my breath away.

[kiz_paws]

#2
Sign of things to come -
snow lays softly on the boughs,
a cardinal rests

[B-Mental]

#3
Sign of things to come
Gentle caressing wind gusts
invigorate me

[kiz_paws]

#4
Sign of things to come
fingers smoothing sheets of silk
and champagne on ice

[B-Mental]

#5
Sign of things to come
smiles and laughter resounding
a weekend with friends

next person picks a favorite last line from the previous 5 haiku...to start the next 5 haiku

[kiz_paws]

#1
Take my breath away
oh prairie fields so golden
or night skies on fire

[B-Mental]

#2
Take my breath away
first long, drawn out, delicate,
amorous kisses

[crazefest456]

#3
take my breath away
your noose 'round my neck ensues
my hands to let go

[kiz_paws]

#4
Take my breath away
oh big city and your smog
I long for the fields

[B-Mental]

#5
Take my breath away
meadowful of wildflowers
purple, white, yellow

[kiz_paws]

#1
Amorous kisses
speak the words that I dare not
the language of love

[B-Mental]

#2
Amorous kisses
Rekindle memories past
forgotten treasures

[Wyoecho]

#3
amorous kisses
adoringly placed on lips
passionate and sweet

[B-Mental]

#4
Amorous kisses
whirl through my mind, breathlessly
losing my balance

[kiz_paws]

:thumbs_up Nice, B!

#5
Amorous kisses
take me to another place,
our secret haven


Next poster pick a line-3 from any of the five haiku posted above and have fun! :)

[B-Mental]

#1

The language of love
so easily forgotten
you must then relearn

[kiz_paws]

#2
The language of love
is interesting to watch
the eyes and lips speak!

[crazefest456]

#3
the language of love
drowns out static, hate sifts
in explosive hearts

[xlxlauraxlx]

#4 the language of love
is best of all, Why?, well it
knows no boundaries

[B-Mental]

#5

The language of love
I never fluently learned
Am I dyslexic?


Ok, next entry pulls a final line from the last series of 5 haiku.

[kiz_paws]

#1
You must then relearn
that which was taken away
in order to grow

[zanna]

#2
You must then relearn
just about everything
to find 'you' again

[kiz_paws]

#3
You must then relearn
many ways to bring a smile
to those you hold dear

[B-Mental]

#4
You must then relearn
cold is only cold if you
let it get to you.

[dramasnot6]

You must then relearn
Knowledge and mind must be one
Sweat and persevere

[zanna]

#1
in order to grow
one needs life, love, and passion
they will get you through

[B-Mental]

#2
In order to grow
soil unpotted and reworked
bury plant with love

[kiz_paws]

#3
In order to grow
I cut loose the apron strings
and untied my mind

[B-Mental]

#4
In order to grow
dark days you will endure Kiz
Hold your head high, smile!

[kiz_paws]

#5
In order to grow
a friend quietly listens
no words are needed

[my reflection on my best friend and all I can do is to listen...]

Thanks, B, for your sweet thoughts.

[B-Mental]

#1
They will get you through
those long unending trials
food to the hungry

[kiz_paws]

#2
They will get you through
the small eye of a needle
is that what you want?

[zanna]

#3
They will get you through
wind, sleet and rain, bringing you
the package on time.

(I thought I recognized that line . . . thanks for picking mine! :) )

[kiz_paws]

#4
They will get you through -
friends are those you can lean on,
when the road gets rough

[zanna]

#5
They will get you through
both the best and worst of days,
friends -- chosen family.


(yeh, it's pretty much a copycat, Kiz, but I liked yours, so I thought I would spin it my way. :))

[alakungfu]

#1 Food to the hungry -
Oats for the festooning poets,
Figs dew the maudlin

[kiz_paws]

#2
Food to the hungry
visions painted by artists
who starve as they give

[alakungfu]

#3
Food to the hungry
giving to all of the poor
helping those in need

[kiz_paws]

#4
Food to the hungry
He broke and then gave thanks for
five loaves and two fish

[alakungfu]

#5
Food to the hungry,
Sustenance of feeble minds.
Frown and contribute.

[kiz_paws]

#1
Helping those in need
should be a natural choice
in our quest for peace

[PrinceMyshkin]

In our quest for peace
we offer a helping hand
to all who need one

[alakungfu]

To all who need one
More reminder of their faults,
The other shoe drops.

[kiz_paws]

PrinceM and alakungfu your haiku are beautiful, but the gist of this particular haiku thread is to write five haiku with the same first line, then on the sixth haiku, it would begin with your choice of the above five haiku's ending line. And it would be now number one..... if that doesn't make sense, just see the back-pages for samples...

Sorry to correct anyone -- I really hate doing this, because all art is beautiful and ... and ... well, I really hate doing this... :(

The next four haiku should start with the line:
Helping those in need.

Thanks
K♥z

[alakungfu]

#2
Helping those in need:
Drawing tears from the cynics
and noting their sighs