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SmilesAF
01-15-2004, 02:58 PM
They see us standing,
With all of our burdens,
Our posters and pens,
Words at the tip of our tongue,
No,
Shouts at the tip of our tongue,
No,
Slogans at the tip of our tongue.

We are armed with our opinions,
Raised by our mothers’ morals,
We’re tired of just chopping onions,
Tired of resting on our laurels,
No,
Resting on your laurels,
Yes,
Resting on your laurels.

We’ll stand at corners,
At the bus stops,
In front of the stations,
Until you listen,
No,
Until you obey?
No,
Until you respect.

We’ve been here all along,
But now you start to notice us,
Were standing here singing our song,
Because now they start to notice us,
No,
They always notice us,
No,
They’ll soon notice us.

For many years we’ve followed you,
Done as they commanded,
Now you will try it too,
We’ve been suppressed,
No,
We may seem obsessed,
No,
Too long we’ve been held back.

But now?
Now we’re here,
We’re here clear and loud,
Setting a reaction,
No,
Selling an attraction,
No,
The cat’s out of the bag, and now we’re here too.

Truth is,
We’ve been here all the time,
This,
We tell you both with lemon and lime.
No,
You understand it,
No,
You better learn it,

Why?
Because we’re here to stay!
The women of the world came out today,
Standing in line, in front of the men,
They can beg. They can squirm.
We’ll beat them, ‘cause we want too!
Your gonna learn it the hard way,
‘Cause that’s what we’ve had to do!

azmuse
01-15-2004, 04:31 PM
is this feminazi stuff? - which am not familiar with - if so, i don't believe male-bashing is attractive on either a humanitarian or soul-to-soul level.
re: the poem itself, it seemed rather like an anthem - partly due to the repetetiveness.

SmilesAF
01-15-2004, 05:10 PM
This poem was part of a school project. The task ws to write a poem based on another poem which was Anti war. In other words i chose a strong issue. Let's add i know a couple of real jerks that i had been in a couple of major arguments with, and i was feeling hateful...

Jayyy
01-17-2004, 10:19 AM
I like it a lot, except for the last paragraph. You stir up emotions that anyone can relate, but by giving it a direction in the last stanza, it looses part of the effect.

Good piece anyway, thank you.

SmilesAF
01-17-2004, 03:48 PM
Thank you, my teacher liked it too... :D