will someone tell me if this is good??

[OnesVindication]

tell me what you think

It seems like
Every time I get off the ground
You try to kick me back down
im tired of hearing them say
we know who and what you are
So don’t pretend you’re my friend
So you can exploit who I am
To their friends so they can
run and tell everyone else
So **** you and your lies
and the years I wasted on
Hiding my real fears because
I was to scared to show anyone
Who and what I really am
But this is the end
don’t judge who and what I am from everyone else
Because it the end
where is everybody else
You where only fooling yourself

[Virgil]

If it's poetry, I'm sorry to say it's not good. If it's lyrics to a song, then it's ok, depending on the music.

[jon1jt]

I have to agree with Virgil. You also have a couple typos "to" should be "too." If this is poetry, well...um, ah...I'm speechless.

[blp]

I think it's a good start. I mean, it's rubbish really, but I can relate to it as a starting point for writing and if you're beginning to get over the issues that the poem is about, perhaps part of that is about letting yourself start to write seriously and get beyond this kind of chippy therapy stuff.

Why's it bad? Really hard to say. There is some basic grammar stuff that needs attention, particularly in the last few lines where sense is just lost. Other than that, the use of language is ordinary and flat. It's a real achievement if you can write an interesting poem in words that sound natural, but this isn't that. It's just normal speech with line breaks. The solution to that is not to suddenly start living in your thesaurus and filling the work up with four syllable flowery words. It's good that you're not doing that. The solution is to start trying to think of better ways of saying what you want to say. You're tired of hearing people say they know who and what you are. Well, surprise them. Think of ten other ways of saying the same thing. People assume I'm a piece of paper when actually I'm a tiny book. They keep using me to write their shopping lists and jot down phone numbers. It's boring. And so on.