faithandhope
11-21-2005, 02:21 PM
Help please. My teacher had us rewrite a fairy tale from another character point of view. This is a real rough draft, but the whole thing is a MAJOR grade. She wants us to use lots of imagery and other litaray elements. I have to get revision suggestions and turn all my drafts in.
Cinderella in the Evil Sister Point of View!
My life use to be great is for my mom got married to Cinderella’s dad. She uses to be so nice to every one. Hold up wait u doesn’t even know who I am. My name is Mallory I have dirty blonde hair with brown and red high lights, I have green eyes and some times they turn to hazel. I’m around the height of 6’1, I have a big foot and I’m 1 years old. Ok so let’s get back to my story. When my mom and Cindy’s dad got married everything went down hill.
My step dad got really sick he couldn’t do any thing for him self and need people to help him all of the time. Well one hot summer day unfortunately he passed away. And my mom blamed it all on Cindy. She didn’t know what to do every thing she did was wrong or bad. My mom said that she didn’t try hard enough to keep him a live and that it’s her fault he died. So city had tried so hard to keep the house clean and do any thing my mom told her to do. But every thing she did was a mistake to my mom. My mom just went crazy on her, she told her that it was her job to keep the house clean and that she had to do it all by her self. With the money Cindy’s dad left for her my mom decide to spend all of it on her and my sis and i.e. all ways felt so badly for her. But my sister didn’t really care for her she though of her as a personal maid.
I thought my mom was so mean and cruel for making Cindy sleep in the attic and make her do every thing we asked. My mom was heart less and didn’t care about any thing any more. One day my mom sent Cinderella to the market to get some food and other things that we needed. And when she got there she seen a guy in a nice suite and looked like a royal prince handing out flyers. It said this Saturday there will be a BALL for any single women to attend. It would be held at the KINGS castle. So Cindy ran home because she was so happy because she thought that she might be able to go. But when she entered the house to ask my mom she atomically said no. she said that she probably would have to stay home and clean that day’s felt so bad for her.
So it was the day the day of the ball. I was so happy that I get to go. I had Cindy clean my room and wash all of my clothes and other things I needed help with. Then my mom and sister and I went to go get are dresses. My mom made Cindy do is hair. Cindy had to pull and tug on are hair and every time we would scream Cindy would have to do other chores. It was all most time to go I was so happy. As we where walking out of the door Cindy asked one last time if she could go. But my mom just looked at her and said the kitchen isn’t clean. Cinderella just looked down and said yes mama.
When we left I guess Cindy cleaned the kitchen. When we got to the ball there were tons of girls there and they were all prettier than me and my sis. Then we heard this big horn start to play THE PRINCE HAS ARRIVED YELLED a MAN. Right after that a beautiful girl in a blue dress with her hair in a bun with curls walked in.
That looks like Cindy cried sis
“It couldn’t be where could she have gotten a prettier dress than you?”
She was the first girl that caught the prince’s eye. He danced with her the whole and when the clock hit 12 she ran off and tripped on the stairs leavening be hind a shoe. The next day the prince went through the whole town having girls trying on the shoe to see if it fit them. And when he got to are house my sister and I both tried it on but it was ay to small for us. So Cindy wanted to try the shoe on and it was a perfect fit.
The prince took Cindy away to live in the castle with him and his family. When she got there she felt like it was her job to do all the cleaning but it wasn’t. Cinderella finally moved on and let her step mom and sisters stay home and be use less.
Cinderella in the Evil Sister Point of View!
My life use to be great is for my mom got married to Cinderella’s dad. She uses to be so nice to every one. Hold up wait u doesn’t even know who I am. My name is Mallory I have dirty blonde hair with brown and red high lights, I have green eyes and some times they turn to hazel. I’m around the height of 6’1, I have a big foot and I’m 1 years old. Ok so let’s get back to my story. When my mom and Cindy’s dad got married everything went down hill.
My step dad got really sick he couldn’t do any thing for him self and need people to help him all of the time. Well one hot summer day unfortunately he passed away. And my mom blamed it all on Cindy. She didn’t know what to do every thing she did was wrong or bad. My mom said that she didn’t try hard enough to keep him a live and that it’s her fault he died. So city had tried so hard to keep the house clean and do any thing my mom told her to do. But every thing she did was a mistake to my mom. My mom just went crazy on her, she told her that it was her job to keep the house clean and that she had to do it all by her self. With the money Cindy’s dad left for her my mom decide to spend all of it on her and my sis and i.e. all ways felt so badly for her. But my sister didn’t really care for her she though of her as a personal maid.
I thought my mom was so mean and cruel for making Cindy sleep in the attic and make her do every thing we asked. My mom was heart less and didn’t care about any thing any more. One day my mom sent Cinderella to the market to get some food and other things that we needed. And when she got there she seen a guy in a nice suite and looked like a royal prince handing out flyers. It said this Saturday there will be a BALL for any single women to attend. It would be held at the KINGS castle. So Cindy ran home because she was so happy because she thought that she might be able to go. But when she entered the house to ask my mom she atomically said no. she said that she probably would have to stay home and clean that day’s felt so bad for her.
So it was the day the day of the ball. I was so happy that I get to go. I had Cindy clean my room and wash all of my clothes and other things I needed help with. Then my mom and sister and I went to go get are dresses. My mom made Cindy do is hair. Cindy had to pull and tug on are hair and every time we would scream Cindy would have to do other chores. It was all most time to go I was so happy. As we where walking out of the door Cindy asked one last time if she could go. But my mom just looked at her and said the kitchen isn’t clean. Cinderella just looked down and said yes mama.
When we left I guess Cindy cleaned the kitchen. When we got to the ball there were tons of girls there and they were all prettier than me and my sis. Then we heard this big horn start to play THE PRINCE HAS ARRIVED YELLED a MAN. Right after that a beautiful girl in a blue dress with her hair in a bun with curls walked in.
That looks like Cindy cried sis
“It couldn’t be where could she have gotten a prettier dress than you?”
She was the first girl that caught the prince’s eye. He danced with her the whole and when the clock hit 12 she ran off and tripped on the stairs leavening be hind a shoe. The next day the prince went through the whole town having girls trying on the shoe to see if it fit them. And when he got to are house my sister and I both tried it on but it was ay to small for us. So Cindy wanted to try the shoe on and it was a perfect fit.
The prince took Cindy away to live in the castle with him and his family. When she got there she felt like it was her job to do all the cleaning but it wasn’t. Cinderella finally moved on and let her step mom and sisters stay home and be use less.