You'll outlive me(Help! I'm trying learning writing English poems)

[white camellia]

... ... ...

[mono]

You may surprise yourself, white camellia, knowing that you actually write beautifully in English. All of your poems, I have noticed, have a mysterious quality of language in them that I find admirable and poetic, in the same way Emily Dickinson wrote, though she wrote and spoke natively in English.

"You'll outlive me." You said.
I shaked my head, refusing to accept,
Though every word of you I believed.
We sauntered, softly the clovers bending over at our feet,
And I wondered,
Life and death overlapped as love passed.
With this one, beautiful subject, firstly, and you have a very aesthetic word usage, ideal for this type of free-verse poetry. The grammar, especially with quotation marks, can get a little confusing; I would change the line "You'll outlive me." You said to "You'll outlive me," you said - it further verifies who speaks. Instead of "I shaked my head," I would go with "I shook my head," and rather with "Though every word of you I believed," I would write "Though every word I believed" - just to eliminate a few unneeded words.
Otherwise, the poem reads smoothly and beautifully, with perfect line-breaks, and, as I said, stunning word usage. :nod:

[white camellia]

Thank you, mono!!! ;)

[blp]

'Every word of you I believed', though it may come out of a nonfluent knowledge of English, is rather a beautiful poetic thought.

[white camellia]

To make a poem, it takes a bird and the sky, and the poetic thought gives strength so that it can fly. When the velvet wings twine in the azure, a mystery will shine.