What they would NEVER say?

[Pendragon]

"What ring?" Gollum

[Virgil]

"I love that little boy, David. It warms my heart to be nice to him" ~ Mr. Murdstone from David Copperfield

[OZEED]

oh!! Brutus, I almost didn't see you standing behind me. Julius Caesar

[Pendragon]

"Dang! I missed!" Natty Bumppo

[mtpspur]

"Why your Honor on behalf of my client we plead GUILTY!!!"----Horace Rumpole--any appearance in the Old Bailey.

[Pendragon]

"Quite frankly, sir, I really cannot deduce anything at all about you. Now sit down, have a brandy, and tell the good doctor and me all about your reason for this visit to 221-B." Sherlock Holmes :)

[Hyacinth Girl]

"No, really, I'm good. Thanks for asking though" Faust

[OZEED]

"that's it! no more hunny for me, I think I'll try some peanut butter thanks Christopher. Pooh bear

[ktd222]

"Whoa...baby"

Joey from the t.v. sitecom Blossom.

[Virgil]

"You witches look very pretty today." ~ MacBeth

[Pendragon]

"Hey! I can see myself in the mirror! And I look marvelous!" Dracula

[OZEED]

"yep, yep nothing like a bit of gama rays to keep you looking nice and toastie" - Dracula

[Pendragon]

"Tell ya what. Siddown, have a drink, and let's talk this over. No need fer a gunfight today." Matt Dillon

[mtpspur]

"Why I'ld never dream of leaving my hometown."--Eustacia, The Return of the Native--Thomas Hardy

[Pendragon]

"Why the @##!!% am I talking like a monosyllabic idiot when I actually speak many languages fluently!" Tarzan in almost any of the movies! http://www.invision.smileyville.net/smilies/lgh (22).gif

[OZEED]

and a very good morning to you doctor - bugs bunny

[Pendragon]

"Pst. Hey, Bud. Ya gotta match?" The Devil

[OZEED]

RUN FOR YA LIVES! - Chuck Norris :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

[Pendragon]

"What's so dang funny? Never seen a clown before?" Bozo

[OZEED]

does this t-shirt look tight on me? - Pamela Anderson

[Pendragon]

"I just have a glass of water." W.C. Fields http://www.invision.smileyville.net/smilies/fnd (22).gif

[toni]

I am a father with no bad vices. I work as hard as a horse day and night for my children to have a better future. - Homer Simpson

[camel lights]

"common baby light my fire" -mother Teresa (lol)

[miss tenderness]

should be:

:D :D

[toni]

Peace out! - Osama Bin Laden

[BibliophileTRJ]

This round is on me! -- Elliot Ness

[Pendragon]

"Hey, you figured the bloody mess out, Holmes, and I've been a bungling fool! I'll see to it that you get the credit for solving this case! You must think me a most insufferable pig!" Inspector Lestrade

[RobinHood3000]

"I should work out. Need to work my pecs." - Hercule Poirot

[Virgil]

"Harriet, you should marry whoever you want." ~ Emma, from Jane Austen

[BibliophileTRJ]

Nuke-LEE-er -- George W Bush

Sorry.... I know politics are verboten, but I've been resisting the temptation for days, and the little devil on my left shoulder finally overcame the angel on my right.

[Pendragon]

"Of course you may have an extention on your loan! No problem!" Shylock :D

[OZEED]

So tell me sir, dont you wanna talk about this? - Dirty Harry

[Serenata]

"I am therefore I eat" Descartes

[davoarid]

Howard Roark: "Now, don't get me wrong, Marx did have some valid points..."

[Laindessiel]

"Can you turn thuh light off, man? I wan' i' all dark and dingy! Can' you un'ers'and I'm tryin'a sleep heah! If you don', I'm'na strangle you!" - John Coffey

[downing]

''I love you,Heathcliff. I'd give my life for you. Forget Catherine, look at me. I'm pretty and I'm burning of love"(Nelly Dean,Wuthering Heights)

[Laindessiel]

Whaaaaaatttt? That was hilarious Downing! At first I thought it would be Isabella, now being overboard obssessed with Heathcliff again.

"Hey Harry, look! Spiders! Can I touch them? Oooh, look at those pincers! *dancing on the spot* Harry, Harry, can I play with them?!!!! Just this once?" - Ron Weasley

"I love you all! Merry Christmas!" - Hitler

[Poetess]

"I`m the one and only happy person on Earth"

Allen Poe.

[Pendragon]

"Christmas day, lad? Good. Do you know a good occultist? My flat's haunted!" Scrooge

[downing]

''Rebecca was an idiot dame! I'm glad you came here, you little fool! We'll have fun!'' (Danvers,Rebecca)

[Laindessiel]

"Anjo!" - South Korean president Roh Moo-hyun to a conference full of officials.

(That means, "Sit!")

[Pendragon]

"This hand guesture not only hurts but is illogical." Spock, giving the Vulcan salute. http://www.moveleft.com/vegontv/images/spock_giving_vulcan_salute_286x215.jpg

[Shadowsarin]

Why I will GLADLY go and fight that monster over there, then I will be HAPPY to save the world from evil forces!

(Rincewind - Discworld)

[Pendragon]

"You'll find tobacco and cigars over there in the humidor." Sherlock Holmes.

NOTE: Holmes kept tobacco in the toe of a Persian slipper and cigars in the coal scuttle. :lol:

[RobinHood3000]

"Oh, what a beautiful morning...oh, what a beautiful daaaay!!"

"I feel pretty...oh, so pretty...I feel pretty, and witty, and briiiight!"

"I feeeel good (na-na-na-na nanana), like I knew that would, now..."

- Emily Dickinson (or Edgar Allan Poe, pick one)

[LPRox015]

"Master Yoda! You suck!" Obi-Wan Kanobi :) Hehe..

[Pendragon]

"Shall I list your many faults one at a time, Doctor Octopus?" Spiderman.

Spidey talks smack!
http://1000smilies.com/spiderman.gif

[The Bookinator]

"I feel pretty, of so pretty..." sang the ugly duckling.

[zanna]

"Talk about a slow day," drawled Tom Swifty.

[andave_ya]

"My name is Frodo Baggins,
and this is my address,
Bag End, Hobbiton,
And I've got the Ring!"

Frodo to the Witch-King of Angband.:lol:

[The Bookinator]

Ronald mcDonald says- "I'm on a fast-food free diet."

[shrek]

Lady Macbeth on reading Macbeth's letter:
"I know you would never take the shortest way to your aims, thou is too full of the milk of the Australian pig!!"

[Pendragon]

"You know, we can make a deal here. You scratch my back, and I'll scratch yours, see? Share the wealth, deal?" MacDuff to MacBeth

[Flairy]

"Nevermind sweetheart, we have each other, that's all that matters" ~ Lady Macbeth to Macbeth

[Niamh]

I'm the most beautiful woman in the world!- (plain) Jane Eyre

[Pendragon]

"Not everything is logical, Captain." Mr. Spock

[Redzeppelin]

"You know what? That whale is just a dumb animal and I've dragged my crew all over the ocean for no good reason. Let's just go home, right mates?" - Captain Ahab

[SteveH]

"To cut a long story short..."
Marcel Proust

"Diana and Dodie's death was just an accident."
Mohammed Al-Fayed.
"Diana - time to let her rest in peace?"
The Daily Express.

"Was it not Milton who said 'Better to reign in Hell than serve in heaven', which of course recalls the words of Aquinas in his 'Summa' - book 3, I think..."
Jade Goody

[Pendragon]

"What gives you the bloody idea that I could figure it out? I am not a policeman!" Sherlock Holmes

[Niamh]

"Diana - time to let her rest in peace?"
The Daily Express.

You noticed that as well!


" I dont have a cunning plan me lord" Baldric in Blackadder.

[SteveH]

"Let me give you a hand..."
Alison Lapper.

"It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in posession of a good fortune, is not likely to be in want of a shag."
Jane Austen.

"I'm delighted to meet you, Mr Paisley."
Pope Benedict.

"Likewise, your holiness."
"Rev." Ian Paisley.

"Our Father, who art in heaven..."
Richard Dawkins.

"...and they all lived happily ever after."
Thomas Hardy.

"Carra-bloody-vaggio? 'Oo the bleedin' 'ell's 'e when 'e's at 'ome?"
Brian Sewell.

[Pendragon]

"Moby Dick? Never heard of him." Captain Ahab.

"That is an impossible shot!" Either Robin Hood or Natty Bumpo.

"Madam, will you shut up and let us figure out the facts?" Sgt. Joe Friday.

"Oh, you take the case, Lestrade, please. I'm unable to make heads or tails of it." Sherlock Holmes.

"Whoa! I'm reflecting this evening!" Dracula.

http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l108/AbsalomKane/Smilies/ISNF.gif

[nps_marina]

I've been laughing so hard with this thread! Here's a fairytale special, I am afraid not so good as most of yours...

I can't go today, ma. I've already made plans. I'll go see grandma next week.' - Little Red Riding Hood

'You know, I've been saving some money sis, and now that the parentals seem to be cutting some slack, I think we should just move to New York. What say you?' - Hansel to Gretel

'Dammit, I forgot my inhaler again'- The Wolf from the Three Little Pigs

'Cut out the crap, mirror. Years happen for all of us, and I have to face it like the next woman in this kingdom' - Snow White's stepmom

[Pendragon]

"Face it pig, the farmer wants bacon with those eggs!" Charolette the Spider to Wilber the Pig.

"Get a load of that blowhard!" The first two pigs about the wolf.

[Virgil]

Let's make him an offer that he refuses. ~ Don Corleone from The Godfather

[SteveH]

If there's one thing I can't stand, it's pretentious bores. Real ale and opera bores are the worst.

Inspector Morse

[Pendragon]

"I don't have time to explain things, dash it all, Watson! I just know, OK?" Sherlock Holmes

"Be glad to donate. 100 pounds be about right, that's what we usually give at Christmas, isn't it, Bob?" Scrooge to the gentlemen collecting for charity.

"Stir me up a martini." James Bond.

http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l108/AbsalomKane/Smilies/Bond.gif

[RobinHood3000]

"I don't have time to explain things, dash it all, Watson! I just know, OK?" Sherlock Holmes

"Be glad to donate. 100 pounds be about right, that's what we usually give at Christmas, isn't it, Bob?" Scrooge to the gentlemen collecting for charity.

"Stir me up a martini." James Bond.

http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l108/AbsalomKane/Smilies/Bond.gifHeehee, all brilliant!!

"Just call me Jimmy B. That last-name-first schtuff gets old." - 007

[Pendragon]

"I got tired of hanging out with this old fart!" Robin about Batman

"Hah! I had to nursemaid this wet-behind-the-ears kid so much, I couldn't get anything done!" Batman retorts.

Robin: "Fossil!"

Batman: "Mr. Clearasil!"

"Gummy!"

"Puberty!"

"Need a wheel chair, old man?"

"Booster seat, sonny boy?"

"Toupee tape, wrinkles?"

"Zit crème, baby?"


http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l108/AbsalomKane/Smilies/batman2.gif http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l108/AbsalomKane/Smilies/Robin.gif

[RobinHood3000]

"DIE!! DIE!! DIE, you miserable Earthling peons!! MWAHAHAHA!!!"

- Superman

[Pendragon]

"I can't think of a good punchline..." The Joker

"Frankly, Mr. J., I'm tried of your cold-shoulder and abuse! I think I'll take up with The Riddler, "Pudden-head!" Harleyquin

"Bald is beautiful!" Lex Luthor.

"Screw these riddles, why would I want Batman to show up anyway?" The Riddler.

"Yeah, Grundy look funny. So what? Grundy can repair computers. You want job done?" Solomon Grundy.

"I'm scared!" The Scarecrow, Dr. Jonathan Crane.

"Howdy, ma'ma! My name is Flint Marko. You called about a sandblasting job?" The Sandman

"What am I doing on this stupid glider, and what is this ridiculous costume I have on?" The Green Goblin

"I know I said I needed an extra hand or two, but this is preposterous!" Doc Ock

http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l108/AbsalomKane/Red.gif

[kathycf]

"My stars, is my inner beauty showing?"

~Dorian Gray.

[RobinHood3000]

"Look! Up in the sky!" - Daredevil

I'm sorry, I know it's cruel, but it's true...

[Pendragon]

"Look! Up in the sky!" - Daredevil

I'm sorry, I know it's cruel, but it's true...

HAR! http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l108/AbsalomKane/Smilies/ROFL.gif

[nmolive]

I just want your land baby...forget these lame tree huggers and go with me to the big city! Carl Linstrum to Alexandra in O Pioneers by Wila Cather

[Brigitte]

"Men are disgusting, unattractive beings. They're so weak." -- Lysistrata.

[applepie]

In Lord of the Flies the boys announce upon rescue, "Thanks, but we would rather stay here. We're having a smashing time".

[Brigitte]

Hermione says, "Oh forget the books. Look at all those words. How tedious and boring. I really rather get my hair done."

[F.Emerald]

"Ahhh, what a wonderful day, the birds are singing, the trees are swaying. I think i'll have a ice-cream, and a nice stroll in the park."
- The Underground Man (Notes from the Underground)

"You get used to them really, I like mine being on all the time, it's comforting, sort of like my own little friend."
- Winston Smith on Telescreens (1984)

[barbara0207]

1st witch: When shall we three meet again?
2nd witch: When there's sunshine and no rain.
3rd witch: Let's lie down at the beach and then
2nd witch: get some tan
3rd witch: if we can.
2nd witch: Next week I think it will be fine.
3rd witch: All right, I'll bring some steaks and wine.
2nd witch: I'll bring sun cream.
3rd witch: I apple pie --
1st witch: Now stop that silly talk, girls. Who has ever heard that witches speak
in rhymes. Get serious! And don't forget your swimsuits next week!
2nd and 3rd witch: Awww, must we...?

[Virgil]

1st witch: When shall we three meet again?
2nd witch: When there's sunshine and no rain.
3rd witch: Let's lie down at the beach and then
2nd witch: get some tan
3rd witch: if we can.
2nd witch: Next week I think it will be fine.
3rd witch: All right, I'll bring some steaks and wine.
2nd witch: I'll bring sun cream.
3rd witch: I apple pie --
1st witch: Now stop that silly talk, girls. Who has ever heard that witches speak
in rhymes. Get serious! And don't forget your swimsuits next week!
2nd and 3rd witch: Awww, must we...?

:lol: Excellent Barbara!!

"You know those windmills are old friends of mine. I went to chivalry school with them." ~ Don Quixote

[barbara0207]

Thank you, Virgil. :blush:

Yours is very creative, I think.

[weepingforloman]

Cap'n Ahab: You know, I think the whale and I should sit down over some coffee and sort out our differences. I've recently been put on some anti-psychosis meds, and it has really helped.

Zarathustra (the Nietzsche version): Well, I dunno about you, but Christianity must be the best idea ever!

Macbeth: I think the answer to my problems is empathy and well thought out problem solving.

[Bakiryu]

Nietzsche "Well jesus is the nicest fellow ever! i just want meet him"

Hamlet (to his family): You know I've found the best thing for us! family therapy and counseling! what do you say?

Catwoman to wonderwoman: Hey what do you say we ditch the slutty oufits and go shoe-shopping?

[barbara0207]

Catwoman to wonderwoman: Hey what do you say we ditch the slutty oufits and go shoe-shopping?


:lol: That's a good one!

[F.Emerald]

"Nah, I better not, it's rather moreish" - Mark Renton (Trainspotting)

[Bakiryu]

Superman to Batman "Say mate, why are we wearing capes? this is new york It's awfully hot"

BATMAN to S: at this age haven't you learned that the underwear goes INSIDE the pants.

Robin to S; Hey are you gay?
S: "no"
R: then why do you always wear tights?

[F.Emerald]

"I'll have an egg roll, scrambled, not boiled!" - James Bond

[Shalot]

those white spandax shorts were probably a bad idea and possibly the reason why GNR broke up in the first place - Axl Rose

[spa girl]

Scarlett O'Hara - I'm sorry Rhett, it was all my fault. Please come back.

[Mortis Anarchy]

"I'll have an egg roll, scrambled, not boiled!" - James Bond

Haha, good one!

[zomgmouse]

Vito Corleone: "I'd like a nice big bunny rabbit for Christmas, Mikey"

[F.Emerald]

"We'd better slow down, there are speed cameras." - 007

[zomgmouse]

"How are you doing, dear Sir?" Joseph of Wuthering Heights

[RobinHood3000]

"'Sup?" - Fitzwilliam Darcy

[Scheherazade]

The OP:
I'm not sure if this is a game, but it should be a lot of fun. Think of a fictional character and something they would never say.

[L.M. The Third]

Jane Eyre: "Through the school-teaching job that St. John provided, I was finally seeing the variety that I had longed for while at Thornfield hall. I had no regrets in leaving my selfish and overbearing 'master'."

[MANICHAEAN]

RABELAIS

God save the company! I have already supped, and could not take another bite. And tarry, my lads. Hold the bousing liquor, page!

SHAKESPEARE

From fairest maidens we desire increase,
That thereby beauty's rose might never die.

MILTON

And now the sun had stretched out all the hills,
And now was dropt into the western bay.
At last he rose, and twitched his mantle blue:
Tomorrow's going to be another day.

[Calidore]

"I'm getting too old to carry this thing around." -- Calvin

[Calidore]

"I'd better aim carefully. I can only carry so many bullets in my pockets." -- Any John Woo character

[Bleeding Pawn]

;0

(Snippet #1)

[Calidore]

Anything -- Harpo Marx

[Varenne Rodin]

Nice job, Calidore.

[Hawkman]

Sorry, but I've no idea who the killer is - Hercule Poirot.

[Calidore]

Nice job, Calidore.

Varenne! Nice to see you again.

"We can easily afford to make our employees the best-paid big box store employees in the country. Let's make it happen." -- Doug McMillon, Wal-Mart CEO

[Pompey Bum]

Oh what the heck, this year Disney world!

--Fagin

[Sospira]

'Oh you're so passionate and sexy, I'm so lucky to be your wife.'

Anna Karenina to Karenin

[Calidore]

"I do believe in spooks, I do believe in spooks. I do, I do, I do, I do believe in spooks, I do believe in spooks, I do, I do, I do, I do!" -- Agent Scully

[mona amon]

"Harry!" -- Severus Snape

[Pompey Bum]

Never mind the bullsh*t, let's just ball.

--Little Dorrit

[Bleeding Pawn]

"Lets just fly out of this mess"- B.A. Baracus.

[Calidore]

"Lets just fly out of this mess"- B.A. Baracus.

A-Team! :hurray: I still miss that show.

"Chill, guys, it's only a game." -- Joe Hooligan

[Bleeding Pawn]

Professionally speaking, Daniel.R was a bad choice"- J.K Rowling

[Calidore]

"Writing should, above all, be accessible to the common reader." -- James Joyce

[Bleeding Pawn]

"I am fed up of doing all the thinking and planning, I am not a conjurer. It`s time you used your rotten brains for a change, if you have one, and next time don`t always rely on me" - Colonel J.smith

[Calidore]

"You're right, my bad." -- Pike Bishop

[Pompey Bum]

:lol:

"Don't worry, be happy!" -- Ingmar Bergman

[Pendragon]

"Call me Johnson!" ~ Ray-Jay Johnson

[Calidore]

"'Chief' is fine." -- Perry White

[Pendragon]

"I am as crooked as a dog's hind leg!" ~ Richard Nixon