Tired

[firestarter]

its been so long since i have been at this site. i was able however, to get the chance to go to a writers workshop and learn a few things to help improve my style in writing... tell me what you think

Tired

The feeling is deep, uncomforting
But waiting for body failure
One by one, strength is no more
Until single daydreams
Take me to my bed
Soothing
Dead

[darktiger_64]

Nice, I like small poems. They’re what I tend to write, since most of my poems are just a sudden burst of thought I have, I rarely expand upon them, once the initial feeling is gone. Therefore, I can relate to little pieces like this, I think they say the most. :D

[Phoenix_Tears]

True. sometimes small poems hold more than lengthy poems. I actually read this last night, but i had no time to reply and i had to think of what to say for once, the words didn't come. Whoever said to try not to force rhyme i tried it, sorry i forgot whom it was.. lol

[Koa]

True, small can be very effective...
Shame I talk too much so I end up with loooong poems and when I try to cut them I feel like I'm cutting a limb to a living being lol ;)

[Phoenix_Tears]

Welcome back Koa and everyone else(sorry if i dont know your nick, but its all good right?)

[firestarter]

thanks guys for your replys. i have to agree on short poems, i feel they get right to the chase and they still keep the reader interested. as for long poems, some of wich i have, i dont really like to cut them either for fear they lose the feeling and message that they try to convey
firestarter

[Phoenix_Tears]

Your very much abliged firestarter.

Classic drew barrymore film-
Phoen-x