Jokes

[free]

Two friends sit in a restaurant. One of them pays drink to the other because his wife got three children at once. His firiend asks, how did it happen.
"I don't know, my friend. I only remember that she was reading THE THREE MUSKETEERS while she was pregnant."
His friend jumped immediately from his sit and went towards the exit.
"What's wrong with you?!" Asked the happy father. "You haven't drank your drink. Where do you go so quickly?"
"MAN!" Shouted the other one. "My wife is pregnant, too, and she took to read ALI BABA AND FORTY THIEVES!!!!

[tailor STATELY]

Lol !

Teacher: "If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?"

Johnny: "Seven."

Teacher: "No, listen carefully... If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?"

Johnny: "Seven."

Teacher: "Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you two apples, and another two apples and another two, how many would you have?"

Johnny: "Six."

Teacher: "Good. Now if I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?"

Johnny: "Seven!"

Teacher: "Johnny, where in the heck do you get seven from?!"

Johnny: "Because I've already got a cat!"

Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor

[free]

Haaaaa-ha......!



Lol !

Teacher: "If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?"

Johnny: "Seven."

Teacher: "No, listen carefully... If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?"

Johnny: "Seven."

Teacher: "Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you two apples, and another two apples and another two, how many would you have?"

Johnny: "Six."

Teacher: "Good. Now if I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?"

Johnny: "Seven!"

Teacher: "Johnny, where in the heck do you get seven from?!"

Johnny: "Because I've already got a cat!"

Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor




Meets wolf little red riding hood and asks her for her grandmother's address. She answers: "[email protected]."

[tailor STATELY]

Lol, good one !

There was an elderly couple who in their old age noticed that they were getting a lot more forgetful, so they decided to go to the doctor. The doctor told them that they should start writing things down so they don't forget. They went home and the old lady told her husband to get her a bowl of ice cream. "You might want to write it down," she said. The husband said, "No, I can remember that you want a bowl of ice cream." She then told her husband she wanted a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream. "Write it down," she told him, and again he said, "No, no, I can remember: you want a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream." Then the old lady said she wants a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream and a cherry on top. "Write it down," she told her husband and again he said, "No, I got it. You want a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream and a cherry on top." So he goes to get the ice cream and spends an unusually long time in the kitchen, over 30 minutes. He comes out to his wife and hands her a plate of eggs and bacon. The old wife stares at the plate for a moment, then looks at her husband and asks, "Where's the toast?"

[free]

:lol:


Are you a computer addict?

Do you want after a full stop to write "com."?

In the morning you say to your wife: "Darling, breakfast is on line."



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- Alo, is it alcoholic drinkers counceling center?
- Yes. Can we helop you?
- You can. Does ice go into beers?

[free]

A little mistake. Sorry.

[tailor STATELY]

Lol... Internet: I'm not that bad yet. When I did drink, over 20-years now, one would run into many with odd drinking preferences; the few that disturbed me most were tomato/lemon mixed with a good beer and chilling/over ice with an expensive red wine.

A husband and wife were driving through Wales. As they entered Cwmbran, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town. They argued back and forth, then they stopped for lunch. At the counter, the husband asked the waitress, "Before we order, could you please settle an argument for us? Would you please pronounce where we are very slowly?" She leaned over the counter and said, "Burrr-gerrr Kiiing."

[free]

ha,ha,ha...


This is an old one, maybe you know it.

On a ship captain calls John, he answers.
- WHAT ARE YOU DOING, JOHN? Asks captain.
- NOTHING, answers John.
- WHERE IS THOMAS? Asks captain.
- I AM HERE, WITH JOHN, answers Thomas.
- WHAT ARE YOU DOING? Asks captain.
- I AM HELPING JOHN.

[tailor STATELY]

Lol!... no, a new one for me :)

"A man was driving and saw a truck stalled on the side of the highway that had ten penguins standing next to it. The man pulled over and asked the truck driver if he needed any help. The truck driver replied, "If you can take these penguins to the zoo while I wait for AAA that will be great!" The man agreed and the penguins hopped into the back of his car. Two hours later, the trucker was back on the road again and decided to check on the penguins. He showed up at the zoo and they weren't there! He headed back into his truck and started driving around the town, looking for any sign of the penguins, the man, or his car. While driving past a movie theater, the truck driver spotted the guy walking out with the ten penguins. The truck driver yelled, "What are you doing? You were supposed to take them to the zoo!" The man replied, "I did and then I had some extra money so I took them to go see a movie.""