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MiltonSatyr
08-31-2019, 07:05 AM
The Rabbit walks on moss and rocks
it’s raining mud through broken sticks
the cavern makes arachnids talk
with flames that shadows love to kiss
The Rabbit stumbles into knots
of spiderwebs that line the cave
where butterflies turn into moths
constricting all his limbs like snakes
The Rabbit’s fading light is lost
as silver shatters porcelain
a silhouette of rocks and moss
an endless metamorphosis

tailor STATELY
08-31-2019, 12:45 PM
Enjoyed very much. 3-quatrains with 8-sillybibbles in each line. I like the usage of "porcelain" for a change of pace in L10. Subject and wordplay a plus in my estimation. :)

Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor

Jerrybaldy
09-09-2019, 04:49 AM
You have a very evocative turn of phrase. Particularly liked the second line but the whole thing was great to read.

MiltonSatyr
09-14-2019, 08:16 PM
I appreciate your comments :) Thank you for reading.

Pensive
10-01-2019, 02:57 PM
Its amazing!
Especially liked
"The Rabbit’s fading light is lost
as silver shatters porcelain"

Shadowlight
11-01-2019, 02:21 AM
This is quite a gem. Beautiful imagery of all the correlations of death and transformation. Life in it's constant state of exchange. Definitely one of my favorites written on here.