The novel reflects a typical belief that a young girl in love can have - the belief that she can tame or change a man who loves her. I think it stems partly from a woman's vanity. Any woman who believes she can change a man should definitely read this novel and learn from its message. Anne definitely could see well ahead of her time.
"woman's vanity" is a bit vague, but she surely is deluded. Also, there is some truth to what her husband says, that she does not love him. All she wanted was to get a man and change him to suit herself, rather self-righteously and even tyrannically... If she'd really wanted to stop him drinking, she would have had to show she cared for him anyway, not tried to bully him or make him feel bad by her disapproval and self-distancing. And not have thought of what it did to her so much. Although that may be hard, when you're married to someone. Er...
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