Danielle

[Leannain]

You are absolutely right: they wanted not to hurt my feelings, but to offer some useful criticism. This is what they did.

And what do you think I was doing? Criticism, useful at that, doesn't have to be flowered in beautiful words meant to appeal to that side of your emotions - those who want to make the critic think : "Woah, this guy really cared enough about my opinion to take the time to."

No. Just like my father was raised by a fine man, to be a fine man, a little harshness(discipline) only does wonders.

So, return to what I wrote. You'll see my intention was to save you from falling into moot.

If you want to create a sex scene, make it real. Those two don't desire each other. Before sex happens, there's a mutual, emotional and mental "strip", a seduction that sometimes takes days, weeks or months. What you are trying to convey is an exaltation of desire; the culmination of a longing both characters shared and walked on time to get.

Besides, the sexy french woman is too much of a cliche. And that particular french female wasn't attractive. Legs? Please? Most women are attractive to most males. Most women from my country are quite beautiful so, for me, to write down a description, how and why she seduced me, would have to fly over physical attributes because how can I be attracted to her physically, when so many others are like her?

Hence...

Attraction is the allure, you know. Way you talk, move, your body language, the little words, the movement of your lips when the perfect nuance is hit...


make her beautiful by creating a unique accent. Or the way she emphasis her r's when saying "Rome" or, the curls her hair create out of thin hair when talking to you. The possibilities are endless.

And so much more.

If you want to write a realistic sex/seduction scene, you have to live it. How do you live it? Well, that way and another way. Get emotionally naked. Humble yourself down to your most basic urge: lust!

Then you go from there.

Was that "emotionally and encouragingly" enough for you?

[VadimP]

Was that "emotionally and encouragingly" enough for you?

What makes you think that I need your emotions and encouragement? Also, don't you think that it is pretty naive to play a "good guy" after you behaved rude? Am I supposed to be grateful now?

But sure, there are plenty of guys who use anonymity of the Internet in order to assert themselves by insulting others. I may even write a story about such a guy, and you may very well be the source of inspiration.

[Leannain]

What makes you think that I need your emotions and encouragement? Also, don't you think that it is pretty naive to play a "good guy" after you behaved rude? Am I supposed to be grateful now?

But sure, there are plenty of guys who use anonymity of the Internet in order to assert themselves by insulting others. I may even write a story about such a guy, and you may very well be the source of inspiration.

You don't need to put it into words. How you need emotions and encouragement. If you lacked that need, you wouldn't get all hot and bothered.

Sure you are. Unless you only count "good" incentive as a positive force. In that case, that is your concern and the loss of inspiration. Good guy? Bad boy?

Human beings aren't one dimension. That means that one can have light and dark inside. Not that both my posts reflected any of that nature but I'll humor you.

Thanks. I know I am great source of inspiration not only because of that .

You want to know who helped me the most when I was starting my poetry craft?

The teacher who picked my poem and trashed it. She, made me realize the nature of an artist; I can always get better; never settle with what you have done. In a way, her "rudeness" helped me become a better poet. Take from this what you want or, twist it to laden your emotions.

Sigh. insulting other people. How so? By saying that what you wrote is a cheap attempt at trying to write like Danielle Steele? or that your story reminded me of a downgraded "trying to seduce" sex scene?

This what I get for trying to help people .

[VadimP]

First, you are not in a position to profess "tough love" - you are not my teacher/friend/relative and, as far as I can judge, not even a writer/poet.

I also disagree with the very concept of such "tough love" - it denigrates a human being to a level of a child/animal, who is worth of being cared for, but is not capable of doing it by himself/herself. And it denies the fact that many people have internal desire to be better, regardless of what they have already achieved.
Perhaps you didn't have it and needed an external prompter to wake it. But it only says that YOU were not a grown up person, capable of self-criticism. So be careful to generalize.

Finally, you do not understand the difference between painful criticism and rudeness. It is not the harshness of the terms, but the target at which they are directed. glover7, in a couple of sentences, indeed nearly trashed my story, whereas you, in so many messages, merely insulted its author.