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Thread: do you offend easily?

  1. #1
    confidentially pleased cacian's Avatar
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    Question do you offend easily?

    for me it does depend on what the subject is and the people if it is something physical then yes maybe but generally normally not really.
    Last edited by cacian; 05-24-2013 at 11:40 AM.
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  2. #2
    BadWoolf JuniperWoolf's Avatar
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    I'm going to guess you mean "get offended," although "do you offend others easily" might be worth answering as well.

    Anyway, I really don't know if I get offended easily. I've talked to real pedophiles and holocaust deniers with a sort of detached curiosity. I can have a pleasant conversation with the scum of the earth, but there are about four issues that are ridiculously minor in comparison which can really get me worked up. It's probably because I'm selfish, the issues that make me mad are all directly relevant to my life.

    Oh, and when it comes to personal attacks, I don't get offended and actually kind of like them. You hit me, I hit you, it's fun (as long as they're not taking it too seriously and getting all awkward about it). This is how I interact with my favorite friends. "Nice" people are "nice," but they're never very close to my heart.
    Last edited by JuniperWoolf; 05-24-2013 at 08:24 AM.
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  3. #3
    Pièce de Résistance Scheherazade's Avatar
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    Very.

    Rarely open my mouth and something inoffensive comes out!
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    "It is not that I am mad; it is only that my head is different from yours.”
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  4. #4
    Registered User Delta40's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cacian View Post
    for me it does depend on what the subject is and the people if it is something physical then yes but generally normally not really.

    OMFG! I can't believe you even asked me that!
    Before sunlight can shine through a window, the blinds must be raised - American Proverb

  5. #5
    Registered User SilentMute's Avatar
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    I get offended easily, but I've learned to take a deep breath and give the other person a benefit of the doubt. People often say abominable things to you that are hurtful, and nine times out of ten, they didn't mean it that way. I can't tell you how often I think someone has written an insulting comment on one of my YouTube videos, and then it turns out they didn't mean it the way it sounded.

    The internet unites people in a way they can't unite physically. You encounter people from other countries who have different ideas about etiquette. Then there is always the generation gap. I was surprised that at 38, I have already reached a point where I am shocked by the behavior of younger people. Another problem is that text does not tell you the tone. I think I read somewhere a long time ago where 90% of our cues are non-verbal in communication...so imagine the problem it creates when you can't see the other person or even hear their voice.

    Particularly these days, where reality television has made many confrontational behaviors acceptable, and they are no longer considered rude. How do you know when someone calls you a b**** that they are joking, or they are being insulting? If they were physically with you, you could tell by their tone and body language. On the internet, this is impossible.

    Generally, in real life, I do very well with people. However, I do think that sometimes I offend people online--and usually I didn't mean it either.

    As for trolls...they seem to intentionally offend...but even with them, I've started suspecting it isn't about you. Many of them, I think, are overly impressed with profanity and think it is fun to use...or funny. Some might be frustrated people. However, I think most just think they are being funny...and they want attention. They think the best way to get it is to insult someone they think is popular.
    I don't care if the glass is half full or half empty, I'm just glad to have a glass.

  6. #6
    It wasn't me Jerrybaldy's Avatar
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    I love to be insulted in fun by people I like. I love to get a birthday card in work full of insults and piss taking. The most offensive thing is when somebody just writes happy birthday.

    If somebody is being offensive to get to you then not being offended is a winning situation. But I do love friendly offensive banter. That's a friend indeed.

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  7. #7
    Registered User Darcy88's Avatar
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    Sometimes yes, sometimes no. With friends or family I really don't mind getting criticized or insulted. Helps keep my ego in check. But with strangers it is different. I get insulted a lot, half-wit rednecks in lifted trucks yelling at me, drunks idiots at the bar as well. In those instances it takes a tremendous amount of effort not to just straight up elbow them in the head.
    “To practice any art, no matter how well or badly, is a way to make your soul grow. So do it.”

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  8. #8
    Registered User Delta40's Avatar
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    I get offended when Poms whinge on about this country from A to Z. They should just piss off back to their homeland. Usually I hold my nose if I have to be near them! lol
    Before sunlight can shine through a window, the blinds must be raised - American Proverb

  9. #9
    It wasn't me Jerrybaldy's Avatar
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    Further thought... I am happy for people to offend me as I think I am a bag of crap anyway. It's trickier when they insult someone you care about. Then violence is the only answer. If you don't hit somebody at that point you then have to live with not protecting the innocent. Particularly if it's your children.

    For those who believe,
    no explanation is necessary.
    For those who do not,
    none will suffice.

  10. #10
    Registered User Delta40's Avatar
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    I just got bagged on another forum for standing up for somebody. Noobs with degrees who think their opinion holds more value than the average Joe. Dismissed because he can't talk the talk so what does his opinion count for? to them, absolutely nothing - but they did assure him he's still a friend and he's grateful for that at least. When I said they were being disrespectful, they told me to get out of the thread.

    I find that offensive.
    Before sunlight can shine through a window, the blinds must be raised - American Proverb

  11. #11
    Quote Originally Posted by Darcy88 View Post
    Sometimes yes, sometimes no. With friends or family I really don't mind getting criticized or insulted. Helps keep my ego in check. But with strangers it is different. I get insulted a lot, half-wit rednecks in lifted trucks yelling at me, drunks idiots at the bar as well. In those instances it takes a tremendous amount of effort not to just straight up elbow them in the head.
    Is this being offended though or is it just being annoyed by idiots? I think there is a difference.

    It reminds me of a similar situation when a stranger in a pub said about motorbiking (I had come to the pub on my bike and he had seen it) something along the lines of 'yes you will probably wrap yourself under a truck on your way back. Death trap.' I mean, what a prick! Do I walk up to someone in the street who is eating chips and say 'chips eh? You like chips, you will probably die of heart disease before you are 50, tut, tut?'

    It is not as if I asked for this total stranger's commentary on my life...

    Having said all that, I have to admit that I do get easily offended, generally, depends on the situation, but generally I might. At least I don't take well to criticism, constructive or not. I just like to be left in peace and if people disturb that then yes I might get annoyed or offended.

  12. #12
    Original Poster Buh4Bee's Avatar
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    I am usually the offender. Lacking a mental filter is a handicap. Anyway, mostly I do not get offended, but I can if I feel unfairly judged or brushed aside.

  13. #13
    Two Steps Into Exile Shevek's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JuniperWoolf View Post
    I'm going to guess you mean "get offended," although "do you offend others easily" might be worth answering as well.

    Anyway, I really don't know if I get offended easily. I've talked to real pedophiles and holocaust deniers with a sort of detached curiosity. I can have a pleasant conversation with the scum of the earth, but there are about four issues that are ridiculously minor in comparison which can really get me worked up. It's probably because I'm selfish, the issues that make me mad are all directly relevant to my life.

    Oh, and when it comes to personal attacks, I don't get offended and actually kind of like them. You hit me, I hit you, it's fun (as long as they're not taking it too seriously and getting all awkward about it). This is how I interact with my favorite friends. "Nice" people are "nice," but they're never very close to my heart.
    How did you come across pedophiles? Unlike holocaust deniers, I can't imagine someone nowadays being open about their attractions towards children (with the exception of NAMBLA, which I believe is now defunct or at least inactive).

    I get offended more than I would like to admit, although it's usually by strangers or people I don't know very well. It usually involves silly things. The only, I suppose significant, thing that offends me is blatantly ignorant statements about suicide. I now just ignore people who say "only weak people commit suicide because survival of the fittest, blah blah blah," but it used to be a lot harder.

  14. #14
    BadWoolf JuniperWoolf's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shevek View Post
    How did you come across pedophiles? Unlike holocaust deniers, I can't imagine someone nowadays being open about their attractions towards children.
    I've talked to dozens of pedos online and one offline. Online culture is, in general, surprisingly tolerant of pedophiles (important point: AS LONG AS THEY DON'T TOUCH CHILDREN OR HAVE CHILD PORN). They do AMAs a lot. The general consensus is that pedophelia can't be helped because a person isn't able to decide who they're attracted to, so as long as they don't touch children or have child porn they're alright. Offline I used to be a bartender in a hick town, so I'd give people drinks and get to know them, and then after shift sometimes I'd drink with them some more and talk to them. I'm the type who people often feel they can tell weird **** about themselves to. Only just the one time, after a long conversation and a lot of alcohol and coaxing ("why are you so depressed all the time?"), one of my favorite regulars told me the classic pedophile story, about how he can only be attracted to children, he hates himself, his brain is broken, he often wishes he was dead, ect. He was very adamant that he would never touch a child. I felt sorry for him.

    And that is the story of the only time I ever encountered a real in-the-flesh pedophile.
    Last edited by JuniperWoolf; 05-25-2013 at 04:58 AM.
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    "Personal note: When I was a little kid my mother told me not to stare into the sun. So once when I was six, I did. At first the brightness was overwhelming, but I had seen that before. I kept looking, forcing myself not to blink, and then the brightness began to dissolve. My pupils shrunk to pinholes and everything came into focus and for a moment I understood. The doctors didn't know if my eyes would ever heal."
    -Pi


  15. #15
    Dance Magic Dance OrphanPip's Avatar
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    I wouldn't say I get offended easily, however I do sometimes lose my temper, usually from contempt for the other rather than personal offense.
    "If the national mental illness of the United States is megalomania, that of Canada is paranoid schizophrenia."
    - Margaret Atwood

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