Like I keep saying, best thread on the entire internet.Originally Posted by Paulclem
You couldn't buy this stuff.
Although anyone wanting to pay us should certainly post details!
Like I keep saying, best thread on the entire internet.
You couldn't buy this stuff.
Although anyone wanting to pay us should certainly post details!
Go to work, get married, have some kids, pay your taxes, pay your bills, watch your tv, follow fashion, act normal, obey the law and repeat after me: "I am free."
Anon
Today is the day. The battle of the blondes over at Wimbers. Can that pinnicle of agressive German womanhood -Sabine Lisicki, beat the willowy strength of Russian Maria Sharapova.
O, and some other women are in the other semi final too.
I will grant you they are a lovely pair, but who can forget the beauties of Yesteryear who graced the centre-court, Billie Jean King, Martina Navratilova, Yvonne Goolagong and the sensuous Virginia Wade? They were enough to bring tears to a man's eyes, quite literally !
Last edited by jocky; 06-30-2011 at 10:25 AM.
" There are few more impressive sights in the world than a Scotsman on the make. "
I can remember all of them. BJK and MN were a bit on the butch side, although Martina has reinvented herself as many times as Madonna.
Even when they were playing, we had Chris Evert, Gabriella Sabatini and a few others to look at. And Bjorn Borg.
Go to work, get married, have some kids, pay your taxes, pay your bills, watch your tv, follow fashion, act normal, obey the law and repeat after me: "I am free."
Anon
The Tour De France starts tomorrow. I shall be up late - the time when control of the TV is within my grasp - watching the thrills and spills around the scenic countryside of France. Well the highlights anyway.
Aye, it is exciting watching a front wheel touching a rear wheel on the mountain stages and watching the cyclists tumbling down the Alps or Pyrenees. Then to see the sprint to the finish knowing damn well that the winner is full of masked steroids. It does kind of take the shine off the forthcoming olympics.
I always thought the TV control was in my grasp when Mrs Jocky was working nights until I accidentally pressed Sexcetera only to be informed that this channel is not available. After much deliberation I realised she who must be obeyed had configured the parental controls. It did not help in the morning when she came home and enquired, with a wicked smile,
"Was the telly good Jocky, what did you watch ?"
The Magic Roundabout.
" There are few more impressive sights in the world than a Scotsman on the make. "
Oh, the joys of Scotland in the summer!
Unlike NZ, where although the winter has been ridiculously mild, the viruses have tried to make up for it by coming up with the most-virulent and violent influenza I've seen to date. The Great Piggy 'Flu Scare was but a cold compared to this year's event.
For the past ten days I have had the two sickest kids you've ever seen outside a hospital! Temperatures >39/103, coughing like terminal TB patients, throats burning like acid.....
Thankfully, I was vaccinated against it. This bug will be mowing them down like a combine harvester in the old folks' homes of the country.
You northern hemisphere types, let me advise you right now to make sure you get vaccinated this year!
Go to work, get married, have some kids, pay your taxes, pay your bills, watch your tv, follow fashion, act normal, obey the law and repeat after me: "I am free."
Anon
Everyone around here (Texas) is running a 100F + fever, due to the fact that it is 100+ outside! As the saying goes; "It's hotter than hell's half acre"
...For the past ten days I have had the two sickest kids you've ever seen outside a hospital! Temperatures >39/103, coughing like terminal TB patients, throats burning like acid.....
Hope the kids get well soon.
Oh, by the way Jocky, I believe I saw Turncoat and Bartok heading west to Roswell. I figur they plan to take part in the upcoming July 8th celebrations.
.
Day one and there was a forty bike pile up that reconfigured the ending. Dramatic stuff.Aye, it is exciting watching a front wheel touching a rear wheel on the mountain stages and watching the cyclists tumbling down the Alps or Pyrenees. Then to see the sprint to the finish knowing damn well that the winner is full of masked steroids. It does kind of take the shine off the forthcoming olympics.
I always thought the TV control was in my grasp when Mrs Jocky was working nights until I accidentally pressed Sexcetera only to be informed that this channel is not available. After much deliberation I realised she who must be obeyed had configured the parental controls. It did not help in the morning when she came home and enquired, with a wicked smile,
"Was the telly good Jocky, what did you watch ?"
The Magic Roundabout.
I hpe the kids get well too Atheist. My wife usually gets the flu jab along with the elderlies.
Been reading the blurb that came with my testicle tape, it is printed on a card the shape of a Ram's scrotal sac and comes with several dire warnings for the Mature Ram including this one:-
"The scrotum is rich in sweat glands that cool the testicles if it is allowed to hang in the breeze. However, sheep will pant and lie down when the are hot. By doing this, rams are lying on their testicles and cooking them."
A warning I think all chaps should take heed of - especially in Texas!
There you go Gilliatt. You'd better hang them out...just to be sure...
Actually it's been a bit warm here today...
Last edited by Paulclem; 07-03-2011 at 05:18 PM.
When the gold runs out in Jo'burg, they will start mining the comedy in this thread!
Mick's testicle tapes are about 25 Troy ounces on their own.
(Kids are improving now, thanks!)
Go to work, get married, have some kids, pay your taxes, pay your bills, watch your tv, follow fashion, act normal, obey the law and repeat after me: "I am free."
Anon
Not to worry gentlemen, in Texas the men and Rams begin sleeping on their backs at the turn of the summer solstice.
.
I can't do that unfortunately. I snore like a ram on the rampage, or rather I'm told i do. I have seen no evidence of the truth of the statement just the results of the claim which is sore ribs and back of a morning. (Mrs Paulclem is intolerant of snoring. Either that or she needs an excuse for prone, small hours boxercise).
Have you ever considered the possibility she may be telling whoppers and using your sinus problems as a smokescreen giving her the justification to beat you up during the night ?
I believe that my phone may have been hacked by News International and that Rebekah Brooks has ordered her private investigators to get me. It is one thing to reveal all my grubby secrets on the Cold Ale thread but quite another to have me and Mrs Jockys telephone rows splashed all over the News of the World. I am just relieved that Bartok and Turncoat have fled the country for the sanctuary of Roswell.
" There are few more impressive sights in the world than a Scotsman on the make. "
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