21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 427

Oh, the grand old Duke of York
He had ten thousand men
But after Brexit is settled, they will
Have to go home again

THE TRANSFER WINDOW IS OPEN

The transfer window is open
Which is very exciting for fans like me
Especially when I’ve just heard
Foghorn Leghorn has signed for KFC

MOUSE HOSTELRY

Mice have very particular tastes
In its society and institutions
So when they choose a Hotel
They normally stay at The Stilton

I REALLY LIKE TWENTY FIVE

I really like twenty five
Letters of the alphabet
I don’t care for the other one
I don’t know y, I forget

I WAS EAVESDROPPING ON THE BUS

I was eavesdropping on the bus
But I couldn’t quite get the gist
They mentioned Angry Birds
But was it the game or feminists

A THOUSAND MILE JOURNEY # 2

A journey of a thousand miles
Begins with a single step apparently
Well that’s the philosophical view
It begins with a flat tire in reality

CHEESE DISGUISE

We had to hide our Horse
So we took it to the dairy
Where we covered it in Cheese
It’s the best was to Mask-a-pony

A NEW PRISONER SAYS TO A FELLOW NEW ARRIVAL

A new Prisoner says to a fellow new arrival
“I’m in for 10 years, how long are you in for?”
“15 years” The other man replies “So as you
Get our first you'd can have the bed near the door

FIVE A DAY ADVICE

My doctor has told me
I must eat my five a day
It’s a target I must achieve
And so I will, Kumquat may

THERE ARE MANY PHOBIAS

There are many phobias
Some of great renown
For me it’s the stairs
They really get me down

ANXIOUS CRICKET

I went to my doctor today with a rash
While suffering acute anxiety, because
Of a plan my Cricket team were hatching
I suspected they were about to drop me
Because my nickname was butterfingers
Its ok though as what I've got isn’t catching

SOME STAR WARS DROIDS

In Star Wars some droids are
Self-centered, like C-3PO
Everything is me, me, me,
He should be named C-mePO