21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 421
Mary had a little lamp
Its beam was all aglow
It led the way to the abattoir
Where the sheep had to go
I’M GOOD AT CHEMISTRY AND I’M FUNNY # 2
I’m good at chemistry and I’m funny
Those are the talents, I rely upon
So when asked for a good Chemistry joke
I replied that all the good ones Argon
HARD SELL
A salesman tried it on with my wife
And tried really hard to impress her
With talk of his Vegan noodles, but
She wasn’t fooled by the impasta
WHEN YOU’RE A DICTATOR LIKE MADURO
When you’re a dictator like Maduro
It’s difficult to find time to shop
But for his Palace building materials
He always shops at the Home Despot
MY DOG SWALLOWED
My Dog swallowed some of my
Scrabble tiles annoyingly
I’m afraid when nature takes
Its course it could spell tragedy
IN THE SHED I OPENED A TIN
In the shed I opened a tin
Its contents were Red within
But it smelt like blue paint
So I resolved it was Red paint
I’M A SCARECROW AND I WON FIRST PRIZE
I’m a scarecrow and I won first prize
When my victory was revealed
By the judges at the county show
They said I was outstanding in my field
MY COMPUTER IS FREEZING
My computer was always cold
In fact I thought it was broken
But our IT guy just told me
It was coz I left Windows open
ALPHABETICAL JEALOUSY
There is definitely some jealousy among
The letters of the alphabet it seems to me
I’m thinking of two letters in particular
Who work in unison and they are NV
FRENCH FAVOURITE
As a Nation, the French
Like to eat Snails
But as a fast food option
The traditional dish fails
PASSWORD PROTECTION
I forgot my online banking password again
So I know what needs to be done about that
And I know the importance of security but I wonder
Exactly how many times I can rename my cat?
I BROKE MY GLASSES THE OTHER DAY
I broke my glasses the other day
So I knew what had to be done
But guess who I bumped into
While at the opticians? Everyone