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Thread: A Little Bit Of Humour # 252

  1. #1
    Registered User Biggus's Avatar
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    A Little Bit Of Humour # 252

    I DIDN’T KNOW IT MEANT EXIT

    I didn’t know it meant exit
    When I voted for Brexit
    To be honest I voted leave
    Just because I like leaves

    THE TECHNOLOGY AVAILABLE IS FANTASTIC # 2

    The technology available is fantastic
    But it has affected me detrimentally
    As I realized I’ve not played solitaire
    With a real deck of cards this century

    CAT GUTTED

    As to which animal cat gut comes from
    I have been lied to and seriously misled
    It appears it doesn’t come from cats
    But from Sheep and Horses instead

    ANNIVERSARY PLAN

    “Where do you want to go for our anniversary?”
    A husband asked his wife as it was that time again
    “Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!” she said.
    So with a smile he suggested, “How about the kitchen?”

    GOLF IS A HARD GAME TO FATHOM.

    Golf is a hard game to fathom.
    One day you will play,
    And slice it and shank it,
    Hit every trap along the way
    And miss every green,
    But then on the next day
    You go out and for no reason
    At all, you really can’t play

    A LITTLE GIRL’S WARNING

    A little girl watched her dad dress for a party.
    And then she gave her dad a warning
    “Daddy, you shouldn't wear that dinner suit”
    He asked, “why not?” his curiosity dawning
    “Because you know that it always gives
    You a bad headache the next morning”

    ARE YOU WEARING A SQUINT?

    Are you wearing a squint?
    That’ll be because of the fine print.
    I wouldn’t bother reading every bit
    There's no way you're going to like it

    MY GIRLFRIEND THINKS I'M A STALKER

    My girlfriend thinks I'm a stalker
    She’s thought it ever since we met
    Well I say girlfriend, I should explain
    That, she's not my girlfriend, yet

    I ASKED C.S. LEWIS

    I asked C.S. Lewis what he kept
    In his wardrobe,
    Beyond suit and dress
    And with a wry smile
    And a twinkle in his eye
    He replied, Narnia business

    MY SISTER IS INTO PHOTOGRAPHY

    My sister is into photography
    It makes her shine and glow
    And she talks enthusiastically
    But you can’t shutter up though

    COULD JESUS HAVE BEEN A WOMAN?

    Could Jesus have been a woman?
    Well, He fed a crowd as far as he could view
    at a moment's notice with little food
    He kept trying to get a message across To
    A bunch of men who just didn't grasp it.
    So, it’s very possible in my view
    And then even when He was dead, He had
    To get up because there was still work left to do

  2. #2
    TheFairyDogMother kiz_paws's Avatar
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    Those are great!
    My favorite would be the Narnia one, lol
    Our task must be to free ourselves by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature and its beauty
    ~Albert Einstein

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