COMMUNICATION IS A CONSTANT WORRY
Communication is a constant worry
And which form works without fail
So is the e-mail of the species
Really more deadly than the mail
KING GEORGE VI
King George VI was not a George
That’s hardly playing the game
Imagine my complete surprise when
I found out that Albert was his name
WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONAIRE LOVER
William and Claire were watching
“Who wants to be a Millionaire”
Which was while they were in bed
And during the ads he said to her
“Do you want sex?” and she said “No,”
So, he asked “Is that your final answer?”
“Yes” she replied without looking at him
“Then I'd like to phone a friend Claire”
GOLF V BASEBALL
Golf is undoubtedly
Harder than baseball.
As in Golf, you must
Play your foul balls
BE MY VALENTINES # 3
On Valentine’s Day
The bat said to his girlfriend
“You're fun to hang around with”
And the paper clip said to the magnet?
“I find you very attractive”
COULD JESUS HAVE BEEN ITALIAN?
Could Jesus have been Italian?
Maybe, as he reputedly used olive oil
He did have wine with all His meals
And he did talk with His hands after all
I WOKE UP THE DAY AFTER THE PARTY
I woke up the day after the party
With a penis drawn on my face
But that wasn’t the worst of it
The perpetrator had had to trace
TWOK
A Mexican friend of mine
Was really cross
After his car was stolen,
Poor poor Carlos
THE PHILANDERING POLAR BEAR
The philandering Polar Bear
Took a fancy to a kangaroo
But when she stole his heart
He knew he’d met his waterloo
THE HOKEY COKEY # 1
I just realised that I haven't done
The Hokey Cokey for ten years, about.
I guess that when you get older,
You just forget what it's all about.