FRIEND’S FIRST, THEN SOUL MATES # 2
Friend’s first, then soul mates
Then we spoke of wedlock
Now are souls are intertwined
Since we joined in holy deadlock
FASHION POLICE
After years of fret and worry
About what I should be wearing
And the pressures of looking good
I have decided there’s no point in caring
All the advice from fashion gurus
Do wear this don’t wear that
Choosing clothes which flatter
Avoid things that make me look fat
After all the fashion tips I’ve had
I’ve decided that enough is enough
I’ve realized it’s not what you wear
But rather it’s how you take it off
THERE IS ALWAYS SO MUCH PRESSURE
There is always so much pressure
To be with people on a holiday
But if there was only one
On which to go your own way
Then that one would of course be
On Independence Day
FORTUNE COOKIE
When you’ve finished your dinner
A fortune cookie would suit yer
But if there is no fortune in it
That means you don’t have a future
THE INVENTOR OF THE ALLEN KEY
The inventor of the Allen key
Made nothing off it
Despite the fact that
It certainly turned a profit
I VISIT MY GRANDAD REGULARLY
I visit my grandad regularly
Even though he’s a little daft
He has the windows open when
He makes me play draughts
APPARENTLY A GOOD COMPOST HEAP SHOULD
Apparently a good compost heap should
Get hot enough to poach an egg on it,
But not so hot it would cook a lobster
Well poached or not I am not eating it
THERE IS A SIMPLE TRUTH IN LIFE
There is a simple truth in life
And it’s an honest admission
It is much easier to apologize
Than it is to ask permission
I HAVE ALWAYS BELIEVED
I have always believed
That it’s quite absurd
That “abbreviation”
Is such a long word
THE SMELL OF BOOKS
I think that the people who say they
Love the smell of books are jerks
Because it’s perfectly clearly they
Don’t know how reading books works