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Thread: A Little Bit Of Humour # 237

  1. #1
    Registered User Biggus's Avatar
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    A Little Bit Of Humour # 237

    IF LAWYERS CAN BE DISBARRED # 2

    If Lawyers can be disbarred
    Can dustmen be well disposed?
    Or can tour guides be detoured
    And must models be deposed?

    A QUESTION OF BALANCE

    My father in law is a pain in the ***
    I hope I’m not like him when I’m older
    My brother in law is just as bad
    A little cockier and certainly bolder
    But they’re very balanced individuals
    They have a chip on each shoulder

    A CONFUSED SPERM ASKED FOR DIRECTIONS

    A confused sperm asked for directions
    Not really a masculine trait
    But he asked and was told
    Oh I wouldn’t start from here mate

    THAT'S POLITICAL CORRECTNESS THAT IS # 2

    That's political correctness that is
    When my little neighbour Allen
    A short *** with a chip on his shoulder
    Is actually vertically challenged

    BLUE NUN

    Mother Superior called together
    All the nuns in the convent
    “I must tell you all something”
    She began her grave statement
    “Sisters we have a case
    Of gonorrhea in our community”
    “Thank God,” said an old nun
    “I’m so sick of Chianti”

    CHIRPY, CHIRPY CHEEP, CHEEP

    Why do men whistle?
    Chirrup chirp and cheep
    When they are sitting
    On the toilet seat
    They seem to whistle through
    Every strain and gripe
    Does it help them remember?
    Which end they need to wipe

    TOY BOY

    My teenage daughter
    Bless her heart came home today
    With a Yoyo
    I think she said his name was Ray

    CULTURE VULTURE

    Isn’t culture wonderful?
    Music, theatre, poetry
    Something for everyone
    To feel or hear or see
    The performing arts
    I particularly like poetry
    Especially poetry readings
    With the writer at the mic
    I go to festivals and slams
    From time to time
    I like to go to a recital
    And ask why the poem doesn’t rhyme

    NOT BEING PREVIOUS

    For those who don’t believe
    In sex before marriage
    Those who want the horse
    Before the carriage
    I should point out
    It isn’t premarital sex per se”
    If there is no intention
    Of having a wedding day

    IT IS A SAD FACT OF LIFE THAT IS # 1

    It is a sad fact of life that is
    Something of a curse
    Left to themselves things
    Will go from bad to worse

  2. #2
    TheFairyDogMother kiz_paws's Avatar
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    All excellent!
    My favorite was the yoyo one.
    Our task must be to free ourselves by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature and its beauty
    ~Albert Einstein

  3. #3
    Maybe YesNo's Avatar
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    Nice ones: blue nuns, toilet seats, yoyos and the technical details about premarital sex.

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