Girl in a Yellow Dress

[tonywalt]

I saw you yesterday in a yellow summer dress,
the color of high dosage diazepam, through the
rain streaked window of a familiar bar, as I walked by,
somewhere in the city,
and I could swear you saw me, then turned away -
like that moment when a bird decides
not to eat from your hand. I had not seen you since
graduation, but I thought you should know this:

I hit harder in schoolyard fights when
you were watching (and you did watch!) .
I tackled harder in rugby matches when you
were watching.
I ran faster in races when you
were watching.

There is an August beach photograph of you and me,
in our 19th year, tumbling hair, greedy as seagulls.
Maybe you've just been all the wild in me.
Some pictures don't come down easy from the wall.

It's been years of small victories and large defeats and
drinks poured,3 cars,2 dogs, expired drivers licenses,
landlords, mortgages, and 15 Christmases.
Are you happy as you thought you would be?

I'm just lying here, writing you this email on
these hard springs. So let's meet at that bar, tomorrow. Yes?
Don't worry. All is well here,
but
there is Something Coming towards me
across the floor. Oh, it just a rolling bottle of wine,
this
time.

There is a place in me that is never filled.
And this is where I am likely to be found.

If you can find this place - Do Come In.

[JoLou]

Oh my. I really loved this poem story from beginning to end and when the wine rolls across the floor, I am there and can hear it's empty tinker across the wood --

great poem, really

[tonywalt]

Oh my. I really loved this poem story from beginning to end and when the wine rolls across the floor, I am there and can hear it's empty tinker across the wood --

great poem, really

Thanks JoLou Thinly veiled metaphors are a fave of mine

[kiz_paws]

Oh my. I really loved this poem story from beginning to end and when the wine rolls across the floor, I am there and can hear it's empty tinker across the wood --

great poem, really

I echo JoLou's comment. Yes, Tony, you took us there. Great poem!

[Jerrybaldy]

Tony. I enjoyed but feel you got bogged down in the literal memory of this. The opening was poetic then became more diary entry. Nothing I wouldn’t have done myself though. Cheers

[tonywalt]

Tony. I enjoyed but feel you got bogged down in the literal memory of this. The opening was poetic then became more diary entry. Nothing I wouldn’t have done myself though. Cheers

It's actually not a memory or even remotely true. But, yes, i do like confessional poetry in style. hell, bukowski is my favourite poet, and he did this alot. i note your comments from time to time on sentiment and diarising. not all my stuff is like this, but it's intentional when it is

if i have a rule, it's maybe that i dont get too weepy and always flavour weird tension to the story - and a sense of unknown.

there is another version of this poem where i leave at a 'rolling bottle of wine this time' - and that might work better, given the audience.