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Thread: A Little Bit Of Humour # 220

  1. #1
    Registered User Biggus's Avatar
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    A Little Bit Of Humour # 220

    21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 387

    Mary, Mary, quite contrary
    Decided to sow Stock seed
    But later she realised her error
    After sowing Japanese knotweed

    ARE YOU WEARING PEDAL PUSHERS?

    Are you wearing pedal pushers?
    I think it’s their appearance you like
    Given that you are a sedentary being
    And you can’t even ride a bike

    ROSENCRANTZ AND GUILDENSTERN # 6

    Rosencrantz and Guildenstern
    Contrary to the rumour of their demise
    Are working as the Chuckle Brothers
    In their most cunning disguise

    A VOYAGE ROUND MY FATHER (7)

    He said “I was asked by my daughter,
    If I could go out to East Africa”
    I retorted “that’s amazing, Kenya?”
    He replied “No I had to disappoint her”

    MY FRIENDS CALL ME SNAKE HIPS

    My friends call me snake hips
    Though not because I’m thin
    I earned my unfortunate nickname
    Because I have really dry skin

    WHEN MY BROTHER WAS AT COLLEGE

    When my brother was at college
    He had an unusual nickname
    Which was the “snow plough”
    Because of his appetite for cocaine

    LOVE IS ABOUT THE COMPROMISE

    Love is about the compromise
    It’s the corner stone I would say
    For example if we should disagree
    We compromise and do it her way

    WHEN ASKED WHAT HE DID FOR A LIVING # 3

    When asked what he did for a living
    He replied furtively “I’m a spy”
    Then he added he was from Belarus
    And clarified “I’m a Minsk Spy”

    IT WAS A SPECIAL TIME WHEN WE WED

    It was a special time when we wed
    In front of family, friend and piers
    We found it a very emotional day
    Even the Wedding cake was in tiers

    DRINK GREEN BEER

    Drink green beer
    On St Patricks Day
    It will count as one
    Of your five a day

  2. #2
    Maybe YesNo's Avatar
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    Nice ones explaining how to compromise and why that wedding cake is in tears.

  3. #3
    TheFairyDogMother kiz_paws's Avatar
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    Ha ha ha!

    And my favorites are in agreement with YesNo!
    Our task must be to free ourselves by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature and its beauty
    ~Albert Einstein

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  6. #6
    A User, but Registered! tonywalt's Avatar
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    MY FRIENDS CALL ME SNAKE HIPS

    My friends call me snake hips
    Though not because I’m thin
    I earned my unfortunate nickname
    Because I have really dry skin

    WHEN MY BROTHER WAS AT COLLEGE

    When my brother was at college
    He had an unusual nickname
    Which was the “snow plough”
    Because of his appetite for cocaine


    love, LOVE these two, too

  7. #7

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