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Thread: No title yet/just a start

  1. #1
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    Lightbulb No title yet/just a start

    I Just want to post this and get a general feeling from people about the story. Please leave a comment and some advice. I would greatly appreciate it.

    .................................................. .................................................. .................................................. .................................................. ................
    Last edited by timds; 11-12-2017 at 02:10 PM. Reason: I have finished the story/ it might be chapter 1

  2. #2
    Suzerain of Cost&Caution SleepyWitch's Avatar
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    I like the confessional tone and vivid descriptions. It's also interesting how you start to gradually reveal what happened. It makes me want to know more about what your/ the character's epiphany was.... and I wonder whether the brother Sam is still around or whether something happened to him. The last sentence is funny

  3. #3
    TheFairyDogMother kiz_paws's Avatar
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    Hey, Tim, this is a good start. Your writing is easy to follow and I am waiting to find out more.
    Our task must be to free ourselves by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature and its beauty
    ~Albert Einstein

  4. #4
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    Thanks SleepyWitch for the comment. I appreciate it. Hopefully there will be more to come soon!!

  5. #5
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    Thank you for the kind words kiz_paws. I will use them as motivation to further the story!!!

  6. #6
    Registered User fudgetusk's Avatar
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    Well written and entertaining. Can't fault it.

  7. #7
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    Thanks for the read Fudge!!

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