WHAT NOT TO DO IN HORROR MOVIES # 8
If you value your life avoid places
Where entities are known to kill
A certain geographical location
Yes I’m talking about Amityville
A VOYAGE ROUND MY FATHER (5)
I’m from a big Family
And my dad said to me
“Your brother is going to Italy
With his new lady”
I said “Oh really, Genoa?”
“No I haven’t met her”
TWO HUNDRED AND EIGHTY EIGHT LOVERS
“Two hundred and eighty eight lovers”
Was not what I expected, not even close
But that was what my mum confessed
And to be honest that was just two gross
IF ALL THE SEAS WERE DRIED UP
If all the seas were dried up,
Every bay, lagoon and ocean
Would Poseidon understand why?
Would he even have a notion?
WHAT SHAPE IS A KISS
What shape is a kiss?
Oh my now I’m in a pickle
Well if you press me
I would say it’s a lip-tickle
BEING IN THE MEDICAL PROFESSION
Being in the medical profession
And being a private practitioner
Is the most tedious, as it requires
More patients than any other
YOU LOOK LIKE A MILLION DOLLARS
“You look like a million dollars”
I told my wife and she was all aglow
I didn’t explain that meant not as good
As she did twenty years ago
HAPPY AS LARRY
Apparently, being Happy as Larry
Means you’re a happy Chappie
But I want to know who Larry is
And whys he so bloody happy
COUPLES ON THE DANCE FLOOR
Couples on the dance floor
In the heat of their oscillation
Can very easily find themselves
In an agreeable osculation
SADIQ KHAN, PHOTO OP BOY
For little Sadiq, appearing big
Is the name of the game
So if its bad news, photo op boy
Is on scene to apportion blame,
If it’s good he’s there, so that
All the praise is his to claim