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Thread: A Little Bit Of Humour # 214

  1. #1
    Registered User Biggus's Avatar
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    A Little Bit Of Humour # 214

    WHAT NOT TO DO IN HORROR MOVIES # 8

    If you value your life avoid places
    Where entities are known to kill
    A certain geographical location
    Yes I’m talking about Amityville

    A VOYAGE ROUND MY FATHER (5)

    I’m from a big Family
    And my dad said to me
    “Your brother is going to Italy
    With his new lady”
    I said “Oh really, Genoa?”
    “No I haven’t met her”

    TWO HUNDRED AND EIGHTY EIGHT LOVERS

    “Two hundred and eighty eight lovers”
    Was not what I expected, not even close
    But that was what my mum confessed
    And to be honest that was just two gross

    IF ALL THE SEAS WERE DRIED UP

    If all the seas were dried up,
    Every bay, lagoon and ocean
    Would Poseidon understand why?
    Would he even have a notion?

    WHAT SHAPE IS A KISS

    What shape is a kiss?
    Oh my now I’m in a pickle
    Well if you press me
    I would say it’s a lip-tickle

    BEING IN THE MEDICAL PROFESSION

    Being in the medical profession
    And being a private practitioner
    Is the most tedious, as it requires
    More patients than any other

    YOU LOOK LIKE A MILLION DOLLARS

    “You look like a million dollars”
    I told my wife and she was all aglow
    I didn’t explain that meant not as good
    As she did twenty years ago

    HAPPY AS LARRY

    Apparently, being Happy as Larry
    Means you’re a happy Chappie
    But I want to know who Larry is
    And whys he so bloody happy

    COUPLES ON THE DANCE FLOOR

    Couples on the dance floor
    In the heat of their oscillation
    Can very easily find themselves
    In an agreeable osculation

    SADIQ KHAN, PHOTO OP BOY

    For little Sadiq, appearing big
    Is the name of the game
    So if its bad news, photo op boy
    Is on scene to apportion blame,
    If it’s good he’s there, so that
    All the praise is his to claim

  2. #2
    TheFairyDogMother kiz_paws's Avatar
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    So witty!
    A pleasure to read indeed.
    Our task must be to free ourselves by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature and its beauty
    ~Albert Einstein

  3. #3
    Maybe YesNo's Avatar
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    The too gross one was my favorite. And having patients is important.

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