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Thread: Eugenís craziness

  1. #1
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    santa cruz de la sierra

    Angry Eugenís craziness

    Eugen’s craziness

    well ,it is my first story so i did my best .
    ( not native speaker)
    suggestion: it would be better if u read the story while listening to dvorak

    link: - Romance for piano and violin, Op.11)

    Meanwhile, somebody sprinkled sugar on bread, the nature sprinkled snowflakes on a city. So, all the buildings of the downtown found covered by a white blanket. there was a great concentration of people leaving the main cathedral which has a medieval and gothic style. Every region of it could be appreciated thoroughly because of its peculiar carvings as well its largely conical roofs. In front of it, there was a giant pine on which thousands of ornaments hung . The tree found wrapped by Christmas white lights that looked like small sparkles but the biggest one was at the top of tree whose light was so intense that could illuminate almost all the city. However, there were also places where dullness predominated. Where nostalgia also dwelt not only in them but also in someone’s soul. Tears ran down his cheeks, while he contemplated the far shinning sight of the city and reminded the last time that he saw his mother .Two years had passed since Eugen’s mother’s death however, his mother continued living in his memories but much more on his Christmas drawing .
    As that reminiscence invaded again Eugen’s mind ,he decided to boat beyond the island . In the weird isolated island, there were ruins made of yellow- giant stones that probably were built by an aboriginal tribe. Near them , it also presented a wild forest where coniferous tress predominated .During the journey ,to avoid loneliness , he started muttering one of his memories : I remembered that day when I was invited to play a master piece ….Dvorak romance in the most important theater of the city which looked .Inside, there were long purple curtains , a huge stage from which one might observe a great number of rows .Nonetheless, the best part was when I shared the stage with Anna, she was an outstanding pianist. As she played, I got enchanted not only by her beauty but also by the melodic and intense way she performed . when it was my turn, I also played the violin too passionately to impress her. When both melodies complemented, I got the feeling that she was also my complement. After few weeks, I invited her to an elegant event of musicians in which attended well-known figures of opera genre. While the guests were enjoying and dancing the rhapsodies played by the orchestra, I was waiting for her for a long time impatiently. Every second only increased my sensation of desperation ,but the heavy environment had finished until I saw her. I got captivated by not only her intense and seductive look but also her slender body while she walked elegantly toward me .When orchestra started playing the second waltz , I invited her to dance . At the centre of the hall, we bowed to each other and I kissed her left hand. As the dance started, we held our hands swiftly .Gradually ,my hand touched her waist and hers to my shoulder , meanwhile our right hands swung together . After many repetitive movements, she rose her left hand and i did my right one to join them, meanwhile my left hand held her back and hers my back. The swifter our steps became ,the more intense our glances were…………………….

    That experience just provoked a nostalgic smile on Eugene. Coming back the island ,Eugene got into the forest to take a profound breath. Immersed in the fresh and floral aroma of the forest , he achieved to be in a state of mindfulness . Unfortunately this lasted until the sunset presented , that fact brought him again another memory. Dragged by the past , Eugen started talking to a tree: and said it was autumn, the color that predominated on the forest was yellow , almost all the trees found nude since all their leaves had been removed by the aggressive winds, despite that, i found it much more lovely………once i arrived to our rendezvous , I saw her sat on a log .Then I was about to drop her by surprise but she noticed my presence by the noise of my steps .after ,we contemplated the sunset while the breeze beat our face softly and brought with it a floral scent .She hugged me to warm me and asked me what is love for u? I responded : beyond gazing each other every second , I think that it is looking outward together in the same direction .Consequently , she started laughing and said “that is what we are doing now “and held my hand as she hugged me more strongly . I wish that this moment ceased slowly , and she touched my lips and mumbled :”no more words live every second rather than thinking .Unexpectedly ,she kissed me passionately for a long time………
    Sadly , Eugen was trapped not only by those lovely reminiscences but also by the most painful ones. Eugen painted passionately the face of her lover on a canvas. his technique based on finding the essence of the object .Thus, he concentrated on the Anna’s eyes by capturing her intense and seductive glance that had enchanted him. After days of work, Eugen got so fascinated by the picture that he kissed it so deeply and left a mark on it .Later , walking through the downtown ,he took a cigarette and the lighter from his pocket .while smoking ,he turned over to a cafeteria in which he observed a young man holding Anna’s hand while kissing her. Eugen continued observing at the window until she could notice his presence. Within few minutes, both achieved to gaze each other. Anna’s look only reflected surprise whereas Eugen’s one reflected aversion and treachery. Unfortunately, this was the moment when Eugen’s happiness began fading away swiftly. Immersed on fury, he bought several packages of whisky .At his apartment, he drank uncontrollably and discharged all his angriness by breaking the windows. As the time elapsed, his hate only increased that drove him to destroy the most precious treasures , his violin and the painting… which was about to be her birthday present . before being destroyed, the picture was again kissed so intensely on the marked region that a hole appeared on .Finally , he stripped the canvas off the mark and trampled it unceasingly whilst the violin was thrown to the window . 3 days later of alcohol and deception, although continued being devastated but a little more lucid, he cleaned the mess sorting all his docs , and getting rid of old his old stuff. while checking it, he found his Christmas drawing. This only woke up a profound nostalgia so tears started running down his cheeks. In spite of that, he felt relief since he was truly loved at least by one person, his a consequence, he took a decision which was to live in an remote place. Coming back his present, he noticed that the night had fallen and was foggy. So he returned the ruins .At home, he lit the candles and took a rest covering with some wipes that also used for his canvas .

    No matter how many days had passed, not only did the past reminiscences continue invading his mind but also inquiries about his present. then, to feel more relief ,he replied some of his inquires silently : I cannot deny that ordeals could bring something better such as my self-awareness. Without it, I would continue observing the world as I was told. But now, my perception about the world is so expansive that makes me believe that nothing is either absolute or defined .a true cannot be absolute because it relays on a particular well, everything is in a state of becoming rather than defined , making it unpredictable .Consequently making the world a place of infinite possibilities .So these two principles allow me to jump in different times and make reality and imagination become one .then, these are reflected on my paintings……………..
    Among the paintings of Eugen, there were two remarkable called “the white canvas” and “the black canvas”. the first one portrayed a world in which there were an infinite number of things .so each object belonged one part of it. the corresponding part was so insignificant for each one that made it nothing. whereas in the black canvas, there was no object that paradoxically belonged more than the world. There were also other peculiar ones. One called “eye-ring” on which it presented an eclipse stared by a man at the top of a ruin .On other painting ,a huge coniferous tree which was surrounded by many colorful flowers .
    Long hours of inquiries wore him out that he decided to take a rest. During his dream, unintelligible forces took over Eugen’s mind that his lucidity faded away swiftly , but this didn’t prevent him from observing the sight from a cliff. A great number of sparkles invaded the dark sky some of them shine multiple colors like Christmas lights while others moved constantly . apparently, the most isolated star emitted such a powerful light that neither the moon could surpassed it .besides, the moon didn’t find in an usual shape so a ring reflection could appreciate on the ocean. Meanwhile rebel tides moved aggressively towards the rocks producing intense and vibratory sounds ,the breezes brought with them whistles that could enchant any being . Enchanted by the view, Eugen looked up the brightest star and suddenly noticed that its light became increasingly more intense that the darkness faded away and ocean dried hastily so he felt extreme heat .waking up from the terrible end ,Eugen felt beams of light beating his face and his heart beating fast .He got up and observed his surrounding carefully, and noticed a picture of the landscape that he had dreamt. This led him to confusion since he had never painted something unconsciously. After several days he reached the conclusion that those unintelligible forces tried to tell him something. Posteriorly, he decided to boat off island and brought all his pictures with him. when the sunset presented , he had arrived to protuberant cliff. Long hours of hiking, he reached the top of the cliff .No matter how worn out he was , he ran to the peak of the cliff and observed carefully the same sight of his dream :the eclipse, the shining stars ,the intense whistles brought on by the breezes, the vibratory and enchanting sounds produced by the rebel tides and the rocks. Carried away by the deep sounds, he started throwing his paintings to the ocean. Suddenly , The tides increasingly grew up that a tempest produced .before departing from there, Eugen said his lasting words: I learnt that I shouldn’t go through life thinking people will do for me as I do for them .Not everyone has the same heart. Fortunately, i was lucky to find the other heart on painting , I gave everything to it that I lost my mind during the process…..but I don’t regret .
    Despite the tempest, Eugen took his last deep breath and dove from the top of the cliff into the ocean. As he fell , the moon started changing from its ring form to a circular one as well reminiscences of his whole life came to his mind. When his body touched the water, the tempest ceased that the environment kept calm. sinking into the ocean ,Eugen stared at the full moon which got away from him slowly until disappeared completely .
    Last edited by nataco; 02-03-2017 at 01:13 AM.

  2. #2
    Registered User Grit's Avatar
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    Sep 2009
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    Proper formatting, sentence structure and grammar would go a long way. As is, this is very hard to read. You mention English isn't your first language and that may be part of the problem. Before you can write well in the English language, you need to master the rules. I recommend you read "Elements of Style" and read as much fiction as possible. Practice until your prose sounds clear when you read it out loud.

    Submitting a rough draft like this won't be received well by readers and it won't help your confidence as a writer. Polish your work until it shines, then it's ready for people to read.

    Edit: Just as an aside, I think the name is "Eugene." A spelling mistake in the title will scare away many of your potential readers.
    While the truncheon may be used
    in lieu of conversation,
    words will always retain their power.
    Words offer the means to meaning,
    and for those who will listen,
    the enunciation of truth.

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