Results 1 to 3 of 3

Thread: Christmas 2015 # 2

  1. #1
    Registered User Biggus's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Woking, United Kingdom
    Posts
    2,208
    Blog Entries
    109

    Christmas 2015 # 2

    ARE YOU WEARING A CHRISTMAS HAT?

    Are you wearing a Christmas Hat?
    Sitting so perfectly on your head
    A gorgeous little tit for tat
    White trimmed and crimson red

    BAD SANTA # 2

    Bad Santa is a bit of a perve
    For the girls with a bit of curve
    He reads the naughty and nice list
    But prefers the "nice and naughty list”

    UKIP ADVENT CALENDAR # 2

    You can now buy a UKIP
    Advent calendar
    I’ve never seen one before
    I don’t know what message is inside
    Because for some reason
    All you can hear is a slamming door

    CHRISTMAS PICKUP # 2

    When you’re on the pull
    If you want to break the ice
    Say something funny
    Or say something nice
    Be complimentary
    Or just lie in your endeavour
    Be devastatingly witty
    Or say something clever
    Walk up to them and say
    “Can I take a picture of you Miss,
    So I can show Santa exactly
    What I want for Christmas”

    LAST CHRISTMAS I GAVE YOU # 2

    Last Christmas, I gave you my heart,
    But I’m sorry to say,
    You really
    Needed a kidney

    ARE YOU WEARING GOLDEN TINSEL?

    Are you wearing Golden tinsel?
    Tied amidst your lustrous curls
    It makes you look so beautiful
    And more like an angel than a girl

    WHEN CHRISTMAS DAY WAS OVER # 2

    When Christmas Day was over
    Mrs Claus needed a release
    It was a very stressful time
    Spreading good will and peace

    So as soon as Santa was rested
    She always liked to have a bit
    Being partial to the "North Pole"
    Well, that's what Mrs C calls it

    YOU CAN KEEP THE SLEIGH # 2

    You can keep the sleigh
    And Rudolph and Prancer
    There’s nothing Santa likes
    More than a Pole Dancer

    SANTA ANA AND HIS REINDEER

    "Now Vortex! Now Bluster!
    Now, Twister and Mizzle!
    On, Cyclone! On, Humid!
    On, Monsoon and Drizzle!
    From their HQ in Exeter!
    To the Met office ball!
    Now dash away! Dash away!
    Dash away all!"

    THE CLAUS’S SAT BESIDE THE FIRE

    The Claus’s sat beside the fire
    And Santa was heard to say
    When was the last Christmas
    That we did it in a sleigh?

  2. #2
    Maybe YesNo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Location
    Near Chicago, Illinois USA
    Posts
    9,420
    Blog Entries
    2
    I liked the pickup line explaining why he wanted to take her picture. Also the ones about doing it on the sleigh and the reference to the North Pole.

  3. #3

Similar Threads

  1. Christmas 2015 # 1
    By Biggus in forum Personal Poetry
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 11-24-2015, 04:36 AM
  2. How old will you be in 2015?
    By Scheherazade in forum Introductions
    Replies: 30
    Last Post: 07-25-2015, 08:50 PM
  3. would anyone be interested in a lit net top 100 books 2000-2015?
    By entropic island in forum General Literature
    Replies: 11
    Last Post: 06-11-2015, 11:56 AM
  4. Günter Grass (1927 – 2015)
    By Marcus1 in forum General Literature
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 04-14-2015, 01:35 PM
  5. The boy who cried wolf, 2015
    By Aperta Verbum in forum Short Story Sharing
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 02-28-2015, 04:27 PM

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •