Mornings
I walked down a winding path that stretched as far as I could see. To my left, snow-topped mountains stood strongly, having resisted the forces of nature for millions of years, and to my right, nothing but tranquil waters. Top it all off with a bright blue sky and I couldn’t ask for a better spot on this Earth. There was nobody else in sight, and I thought to myself, I could stay here forever, walking this path. This could be my life.
But something was gnawing at me. something inside me knew that this couldn’t, this wouldn’t last. This feeling grew more urgent as moments passed, and suddenly my world didn’t feel like a paradise anymore. The winds picked up rapidly with each passing minute. On my left, the once high and mighty giants were reduced to smooth and low hills, having succumbed to nature. To my right, all I could see was a grey mass of fog, coming closer and closer to me.
Suddenly, my ears were filled with an obnoxious ringing, and I felt the humble beginnings of something within myself. Fear came to me, as if for the first time. I felt as if my world was falling apart, the familiar landscapes I once knew succumbing to the forces of time. And the ringing grew louder. I collapsed to the ground, and all I could see was the white remnant of my great blue sky. I couldn’t take it anymore. I wanted this to end.
I awoke with my phone on my chest, alarm buzzing. I got out of bed, went to the bathroom, got dressed, murmuring **** this and **** that. You might be able to tell I’m not a morning person.
I went through the usual routine of everything you do in the morning without really having anything register in my mind. Tired small talk with mom and dad, brushing my teeth in the same motion for....3 minutes? 2 and a half? I don’t ****ing know. I’m tired.
45 minutes passed and I had clothes on, my backpack was packed, and I was waiting at the end of the driveway, for how long I’m not entirely sure. As the bus’s lights first came into view down the street, all my responsibilities came back to me. Homework I didn’t do, tests I wasn’t prepared for, people I felt intimidated by. It all came back to me in a flood of information. I was awake, kind of. I didn’t necessarily feel ready to face today, but I knew it was coming, so I just figured, **** it. I couldn’t stop the bus from coming, so I might as well just get on and trust in myself that It’ll all be okay.
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