Hey Satan! Meet My Sexy Wife!
A short story dedicated to Lucifer
by Wolf Larsen
Warning: don’t read this if you are very religious, or if you are uptight about sex. You have been warned!
You’re selling your wife on the street. The devil comes and buys your wife for the evening. As you think of what your wife & the devil are doing at that moment you’re masturbating stars into the sky — you’re masturbating suns into all your poems — you’re masturbating poetry onto the pages...
When the devil returns with your wife he says: “your wife is as wonderful as any sexy angel in heaven! I want to join you & your wife on your wedding night! Think of it! A menage a trois with you, your wife, and Lucifer! We can find fauvist paintings in your wife’s vagina! If only you would give me your wife every night we could find postmodernism together!”
The following day the devil came to create postmodern architecture & sculpture with your wife. But your wife was busy with somebody else...
She was in the bedroom with God. God pays well! He gives you a spot in heaven — the best real estate — and for eternity too — and only for 10% — what a value!
While God was in the bedroom with your wife the devil invited over a mariachi band to serenade both of them. What a beautiful guy the devil is!
When your wife gave birth nine months later you weren’t sure who the father was: the devil or God. But the baby was so handsome that your own instincts told you that the father of your wife’s baby was the devil.
As you were the husband it was your duty to raise the child as your own.
The child grew up to become an Christian evangelist preacher. He had fire in his voice. He had conviction in his bearing. He had 10% in his pockets. And he had the face of the devil.
Copyright 2015 by Wolf Larsen