Results 1 to 5 of 5

Thread: Rune

  1. #1
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Sep 2015
    Posts
    1

    Rune

    This is not mine it was wrote by a friend of mine who wanted me to post it on here more will come out later
    please comment/reply opinion


    Done already?!" Chris asked/exclaimed, his eyes larger than saucers. The brown headed boy nodded. His job as an assassin fit his attributes to the letter. William sniffed the air, revealing his cat instincts that appeared just after the Ruin. "Yes. He's dead... Wait, did you want to go check?" he asked, motioning toward the now vacant, mile high mansion. "No. I'm fine." Chris said, waving his arms for emphasis. 'You'd think with all those M rated games he used to play, he could deal with one dead body.' A lone figure thought. The person was mentally alone, because they, unlike the other four in their group, were female. She was also alone because she'd decided to perch herself in a nearby tree, thanking goodness that rich people (or at least, this one) like orchards and keep a lookout while the other two talked it out. "Abigail! Let's go! That fuse only lasts five minutes." With a sigh, she slid out of the tree, "Do you think it'll take us more than five minutes to get out of here?" Chris shook his head. "Well, we still might as well go. This place is depressing." William said, giving the well lit house a final cursory glance, making sure that they left no evidence that someone had been here, and remembering happier, carefree times that were now nonexistent. Now, electricity doesn't exist, the world is closer to the sun, and a nuclear war is on the breach of beginning. (The Ruin: no "awesome" apocalypse, no peaceful asteroid hitting collision that makes everything blow up. Just fear and heat.) All three people wiped the moisture off their foreheads, but that did little to help. They were drenched in sweat. "C'mon. I'm tired of roasting." Abigail said. Chris quickly checked his watch. "Three minutes before this place blows up. Let's move out." Chuckling at his choice of words, they took off. None of them had been star athletes before the Ruin, but the Ruin brought out the best in them, along with skills they didn't know they had, but were grateful for. A hug shape loomed in the distance; the trio stopped for a quick breather, each thinking the same word: Home. Which, at the moment, was positioned between two hills, giving some cover. Only some; it's a little hard to hide a twenty-five foot in diameter, alien style space ship. "That thing needs a dome. It would only take two days..." Chris stopped, silenced by a glare via Abigail. "Chris, do you remember what I've told you, time and time again?" The response she got was a questioning look. Rubbing her temples, she spoke again, trying to keep her voice level, "I'm getting tired of saying this: Due to the fact that the Earth is closer to the Sun and the ozone layer is almost gone, the Sun's rays are 50 times hotter. So we need all the shade we can get. As you know, the ship has many special features." Chris seemed to buzz with excitement, "Example: There's a space in the for nuclear weapons in the storage unit." William rolled his eyes at the excited sixteen year old, "Really? I had no idea! Hey, Abigail, we have storage for nuclear weapons!" Not a laugh escaped the girl. She held her hand up for silence, cutting off Chris' response, "As I was saying, one of the ship's features is that it has special insulation that keeps hot air out and cold air in, also, any hot air that makes it in gets cooled. However, if the Sun's rays were to shine directly into the ship, this system doesn't work because the Sun's rays heat up the air faster than the ship can cool it. So, we roast slowly and painfully." She stared Chris down. The man may be taller, but she could win a staring match with a T-Rex: it took her no time at all to make Chris feel two inches tall. Especially with her next words: "So, apparently, you want us, your family, to turn into a nice overcooked roast... Good for you, you're worse than the president." She started walking toward their ship. Chris glanced at William then walked away saying, "I hope you remember the password, cause Austin is out getting supplies and Devin stays in that lab of his." William caught up in one graceful, catlike leap, "What is he making now?" They'd caught up to Abigail by now, she'd been standing at the door, waiting. "Devin, last I checked, though knowing him he's probably working on eight things at once, was workin' on the solar panels, making them able to get more sunlight, but take up less space." William shook his head, "He always has to work on something or he goes nuts." They were silent for a second, remembering the last time... That day, everybody learned that Devin could scream louder and at a higher pitch than any girl on the planet. Abigail chuckled and turned to the door, ready to say the password, but stopped, her mouth slightly open. She turned back to the boys, biting her bottom lip, trying to remember something. "Oh God, did you forget it?!" Chris almost yelled, panicked at the thought of staying in the heat one more minute. Abigail held up a hand, then ticked numbers off her fingers, "Five... Four... Three... Two... One...." A loud boom made the boys cover their ears, Abigail just laughed: William had to cover two sets of ears, thanks to him being a cat hybrid. He had his right arm wrapped around his head, blocking both of his cat ears and human ears. Abigail wolf whistled, "What a dust cloud.... I think even Austin knows the mission's complete now... Actually, we best hurry. Someone might come and investigate, they can't see us, so we shouldn't be here when they do." She glared at Chris briefly, "Yes, I remember the password. You?" Chris rubbed the back of his head, ashamed, "No." Abigail nodded and turned back toward the door, "Rosado estupido!" A hatch opened, tall enough for William to get on Chris' shoulders, then walk through the door and still clear it by a couple of inches. Which was a good thing since Chris was hauling a well equipped bazooka that was seven foot long. How he manages it, it's a mystery even to Devin. "Have fun?" A deep voice came from within. Abigail, Chris, and William darted inside. Sure enough, there was a well muscled, 6'5" , black haired, brown eyed man sitting at a fold out card table adjusting the sights on a gun. "I thought you went into town?", Abigail asked, walking thought the doorway, making a mental note to, again, ask why there's no door. "It took less time than expected." William sniffed, "I smell blood... Austin, what happened?" Chris looked surprised, "I though this town was safe? And..." The unspoken question hung in air, "Who would mess with Austin?" Unlike the rest of the group, he doesn't need to wear armor and his whole body could be used as a weapon. The "gang" thought his special skill was invincibility , but he still manages to get hurt, and in the strangest ways. "It wasn't a fight. Well, not much of one anyway." Abigail vanished down the hallway, opening the door labeled "A.P.G. M.D." She rolled her eyes at the last part. The smell of fruit hit her as she opened the door, "Aah, I love my room." She said, wanting to just flop down on the bed and thank whoever was listening that her room was the coldest, thus the perfect storage unit for food. She never needed to go buy any air fresheners.... unless someone craved fish. (Nowadays, you can only buy in bulk.) Abigail walked over to her cot, carefully avoiding the large crates stacked to the ceiling. She ducked under the netting that Devin has installed above her bed, "To catch the crates. They'd fall into the net, then onto the floor, keeping you from getting seriously injured.", he had said. She'd rolled her eyes, but was grateful for the protection. Sliding her hand under her pillow, she pulled out a wickedly sharp knife. She held it in her left hand, while searching some more. She felt a smooth surface under her fingertips. "Gotcha." She said, pulling out a first aid kit. "I hope there's enough disinfectant." She slid the knife back under the pillow, eased around the crates and out the door. She turned and pulled on it lightly. It slammed shut and she winced. "Easy on that door! I've already replaced those hinges twice!" Chris yelled from the kitchen. "Don't know my own strength. And don't yell. It makes the worst echo and I'm just down the hall." The female assassin said, ghosting back into the room. Austin glanced at her defiantly. "I'm not hurt." 'Here we go.' The senior assassin thought. She calmly laid the kit on the card table and looked her long time friend in the eye. "We've been over this, haven't we?" Her tone was gentle; she wasn't trying to argue, just stating her case. Austin nodded, the defiance leaking out of his eyes. "Didn't you feel better the next day when you got "doctored" on?" She asked, putting air quotes around the word "doctored". Austin nodded and turned so his right side was visible. "You win." Abigail pulled up a chair, carefully looked at the at the four inch long cut and winced. William gave a low whistle and said, "Dude, what the heck happened?" Devin walked into the room as Abigail unclasped the kit. "I told you it was worse than it looked." Abigail gave their resident scientist a cursory glance, then looked away for fear of laughing. He was wearing orange protective goggles and a blue suit styled like a janitor's uniform, his name even stitched in black letters. But, the suit had a hidden feature: It, with the proper trigger word, would form a shield that you could drop one million nuclear bombs on, but it would not break. Which he constantly bragged about. "William, can you come here. I need to borrow your cat eyes." William walked over as Chris asked, "What's wrong? He just needs a bandage..... Right?" Abigail sighed, "I wish. He has glass in his cheek. What'd you do this time, big guy?" Austin said, "I threw a zombie though an empty store's window. I guess of the glass hit me." He then shrugged like it was nothing. Abigail sighed, "More stuff to worry about? Ugh." Chris looked at Devin, "Take us into the air." "No," Abigail said. "Not while I'm fixing Hulk here up. If Devin has to make the ship roll, we're all going to go flying and I'm probably going to have some sort of tool in hand and somebody's going to get hurt." William's ears twitched in amusement and he heard something. Chris nodded toward the door, pulling a gun out of his belt. "No, no. Whatever it is, it's far away. But, there's a lot of noise coming from it.... It's making me nervous." "We can tell. Your tail is twitching like crazy." Devin said. No one laughed, they were watching Abigail. She'd grabbed a pair of tweezers and was pulling out glass shards, William pointing out the one's she couldn't see. "That's it." Abigail breathed out, "Did I hurt you, Austin?" She asked while re-sterilizing the tweezers and putting then back in the box, trusting William's call. "Nope... Now what?" Abigail smiled, pulling out two cotton swabs, a bottle of disinfectant, and one bandage. "Crap." "Next time, think before you act and avoid this process altogether," was the joking reply. They got injured, no matter how hard they tried to stay safe. "All right, all right. Fix me up, Doc." He got a quick glare, then, the female assassin got to work. "Done.", she said, pulling away one minute later. The bandage was almost invisible against Austin's skin. "There. No one can tell." Devin said. "You should be proud, Devin. The bandage did exactly what is was supposed to do: Blend into the wearers skin and give the illusion that they were never hurt... Well done." Abigail said, giving him a short round of applause. Devin bowed nonetheless, "Thank you, thank you. I'm quite proud of my invention. Now, I think I'll have my meal in the science lab. " He turned around and grabbed a previously unnoticed bag. "Excuse me." He said, easily gliding out of room, across the hall to his room/science lab, that was armed with everything but toothpicks. As he walked by, Abigail got a good look at the bag and walked over to the counter. "Yum! McDonald's! Oh, William, I think this is for you." She held up a perfectly cooked fish and one large bag with a yellow M on it. "I had a lucky find in town. I also got some more fish." 'There should be enough fruit to hid the smell...' Abigail thought as she laid the food on the table and then... Clank, clank. "Honestly, who knocks on a metal door?!" Austin exclaimed, voice almost a yell of exasperation while Chris dug through the bag. "Keep it down. I'm opening the door. William, guard the kitchen. Austin, guard William. Chris.... guard the food, I guess. Devin gets to guard himself." Abigail walked out of the kitchen, checking that her knife was in her belt and that everyone was in their places. She took a deep breath and opened the hatch a little. "Stand back!" she said, her voice full of command. She threw the door open, the sight that met her eyes got her on guard. "We're from the White House. We're the special government group, the Mazuko. We have a new mission for you and your group" Their voices were snakelike and promised death. "Alright. Let's have it.... Mazuko-sama." She said slyly, alerting them that she knew some Japanese. They handed her an envelope that she carefully weighed in her hand. 'Not heavy enough to be a bomb, but too heavy to be just one or two pieces of paper.' "Thanks. We'll get to it as soon as we can... Is there some way to alert you that the job is done? Or will you just know?" She asked, sounding professional, yet kind. 'The client comes first. The job second. I have to deal with these three "people" first'. The "Mazuko" were dressed in all black cloaks, hoods up. Abigail had a feeling she didn't want to see what was under the hood. "We'll know. Goodbye, Abigail." Then, they vanished. "How did they know my name... Ah well." She said, yanking the hatch closed. "Who was it? The mailman?" Chris asked, digging into some sort of burger. "Yes, Chris. It was the UPS guys delivering our new TV." Austin said. "New mission." Abigail said, throwing the envelope on the table. Austin glanced at it calmly and William picked it up. "There's something on the front." Sure enough, in purple ink, there was every one's name and the word "Mazuko". "Mazuko... What is that?" Chris asked through a mouthful of food. "It's Japanese." Abigail said, interrupting William who was scolding Chris for talking with his mouth full. "Well..?" William said, asking for elaboration. "It means..." Her face was full of confusion and concern. She put her head in her hands and worked to school her expression. "Er..." William said, wondering, like the rest, what had upset the girl. Abigail sat up suddenly, "Mazuko. It means monster." Everyone looked at each other, wondering what they'd gotten themselves into this time.

  2. #2
    Registered User Calidore's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    Chicago
    Posts
    5,070
    A huge, unformatted block of text like this is a huge chore to read. If you want feedback, best start by making the text you want feedback on presentable. Format it properly and proofread it, then bump the thread.
    You must be the change you wish to see in the world. -- Mahatma Gandhi

  3. #3
    Registered User Steven Hunley's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    San Diego Calif.
    Posts
    1,711
    Blog Entries
    15
    Calidore has a point. It may be good but we'll never, nobody ,will ever know, because nobody will ever be able to slog through it. Of course, if you're not willing to expend the time to fix it, how can you expect us to take the time to read it?

  4. #4
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Oct 2015
    Posts
    8
    Alright, I don't have much to do. So I decided to try and clean up the story for your friend in case he/she didn't have a cleaned up version. Now if anyone still doesn't care to read that is fine but I decided to at least make it semireadable to make it easier for our friend later. I read a little but not deeply so I have no advice yet. I will make a read later
    "Done already?!" Chris asked/exclaimed, his eyes larger than saucers.
    The brown headed boy nodded. His job as an assassin fit his attributes to the letter. William sniffed the air, revealing his cat instincts that appeared just after the Ruin.
    "Yes. He's dead... Wait, did you want to go check?" he asked, motioning toward the now vacant, mile high mansion.
    "No. I'm fine." Chris said, waving his arms for emphasis.
    'You'd think with all those M rated games he used to play, he could deal with one dead body.' A lone figure thought.
    The person was mentally alone, because they, unlike the other four in their group, were female. She was also alone because she'd decided to perch herself in a nearby tree, thanking goodness that rich people (or at least, this one) like orchards and keep a lookout while the other two talked it out.
    "Abigail! Let's go! That fuse only lasts five minutes."
    With a sigh, she slid out of the tree, "Do you think it'll take us more than five minutes to get out of here?" Chris shook his head.
    "Well, we still might as well go. This place is depressing" William said, giving the well lit house a final cursory glance, making sure that they left no evidence that someone had been here, and remembering happier, carefree times that were now nonexistent.
    Now, electricity doesn't exist, the world is closer to the sun, and a nuclear war is on the breach of beginning. (The Ruin: no "awesome" apocalypse, no peaceful asteroid hitting collision that makes everything blow up. Just fear and heat.)
    All three people wiped the moisture off their foreheads, but that did little to help. They were drenched in sweat.
    "C'mon. I'm tired of roasting." Abigail said.
    Chris quickly checked his watch. "Three minutes before this place blows up. Let's move out."
    Chuckling at his choice of words, they took off. None of them had been star athletes before the Ruin, but the Ruin brought out the best in them, along with skills they didn't know they had, but were grateful for. A huge shape loomed in the distance; the trio stopped for a quick breather, each thinking the same word: Home. Which, at the moment, was positioned between two hills, giving some cover. Only some; it's a little hard to hide a twenty-five foot in diameter, alien style space ship.
    "That thing needs a dome. It would only take two days..." Chris stopped, silenced by a glare via Abigail.
    "Chris, do you remember what I've told you, time and time again?"
    The response she got was a questioning look.
    Rubbing her temples, she spoke again, trying to keep her voice level, "I'm getting tired of saying this: Due to the fact that the Earth is closer to the Sun and the ozone layer is almost gone, the Sun's rays are 50 times hotter. So we need all the shade we can get. As you know, the ship has many special features"
    Chris seemed to buzz with excitement, "Example: There's a space in the for nuclear weapons in the storage unit."
    William rolled his eyes at the excited sixteen year old, "Really? I had no idea! Hey, Abigail, we have storage for nuclear weapons!"
    Not a laugh escaped the girl. She held her hand up for silence, cutting off Chris' response, "As I was saying, one of the ship's features is that it has special insulation that keeps hot air out and cold air in, also, any hot air that makes it in gets cooled. However, if the Sun's rays were to shine directly into the ship, this system doesn't work because the Sun's rays heat up the air faster than the ship can cool it. So, we roast slowly and painfully."
    She stared Chris down. The man may be taller, but she could win a staring match with a T-Rex: it took her no time at all to make Chris feel two inches tall.
    Especially with her next words: "So, apparently, you want us, your family, to turn into a nice overcooked roast... Good for you, you're worse than the president." She started walking toward their ship.
    Chris glanced at William then walked away saying, "I hope you remember the password, cause Austin is out getting supplies and Devin stays in that lab of his"
    William caught up in one graceful, catlike leap, "What is he making now?"
    They'd caught up to Abigail by now, she'd been standing at the door, waiting. "Devin, last I checked, though knowing him he's probably working on eight things at once, was workin' on the solar panels, making them able to get more sunlight, but take up less space."
    William shook his head, "He always has to work on something or he goes nuts."
    They were silent for a second, remembering the last time... That day, everybody learned that Devin could scream louder and at a higher pitch than any girl on the planet. Abigail chuckled and turned to the door, ready to say the password, but stopped, her mouth slightly open. She turned back to the boys, biting her bottom lip, trying to remember something.
    "Oh God, did you forget it?!" Chris almost yelled, panicked at the thought of staying in the heat one more minute.
    Abigail held up a hand, then ticked numbers off her fingers, "Five... Four... Three... Two... One...." A loud boom made the boys cover their ears, Abigail just laughed: William had to cover two sets of ears, thanks to him being a cat hybrid. He had his right arm wrapped around his head, blocking both of his cat ears and human ears.
    Abigail wolf whistled, "What a dust cloud.... I think even Austin knows the mission's complete now... Actually, we best hurry. Someone might come and investigate, they can't see us, so we shouldn't be here when they do." She glared at Chris briefly, "Yes, I remember the password. You?"
    Chris rubbed the back of his head, ashamed, "No."
    Abigail nodded and turned back toward the door, "Rosado estupido!"
    A hatch opened, tall enough for William to get on Chris' shoulders, then walk through the door and still clear it by a couple of inches. Which was a good thing since Chris was hauling a well equipped bazooka that was seven foot long. How he manages it, it's a mystery even to Devin.
    "Have fun?" A deep voice came from within. Abigail, Chris, and William darted inside. Sure enough, there was a well muscled, 6'5" , black haired, brown eyed man sitting at a fold out card table adjusting the sights on a gun.
    "I thought you went into town?", Abigail asked, walking through the doorway, making a mental note to, again, ask why there's no door.
    "It took less time than expected." William sniffed, "I smell blood... Austin, what happened?"
    Chris looked surprised, "I thought this town was safe? And..."
    The unspoken question hung in air, "Who would mess with Austin?" Unlike the rest of the group, he doesn't need to wear armor and his whole body could be used as a weapon. The "gang" thought his special skill was invincibility , but he still manages to get hurt, and in the strangest ways.
    "It wasn't a fight. Well, not much of one anyway." Abigail vanished down the hallway, opening the door labeled "A.P.G. M.D." She rolled her eyes at the last part.
    The smell of fruit hit her as she opened the door, "Aah, I love my room." She said, wanting to just flop down on the bed and thank whoever was listening that her room was the coldest, thus the perfect storage unit for food. She never needed to go buy any air fresheners.... unless someone craved fish. (Nowadays, you can only buy in bulk.) Abigail walked over to her cot, carefully avoiding the large crates stacked to the ceiling. She ducked under the netting that Devin has installed above her bed, "To catch the crates. They'd fall into the net, then onto the floor, keeping you from getting seriously injured.", he had said. She'd rolled her eyes, but was grateful for the protection. Sliding her hand under her pillow, she pulled out a wickedly sharp knife. She held it in her left hand, while searching some more. She felt a smooth surface under her fingertips.
    "Gotcha." She said, pulling out a first aid kit. "I hope there's enough disinfectant"
    She slid the knife back under the pillow, eased around the crates and out the door. She turned and pulled on it lightly. It slammed shut and she winced.
    "Easy on that door! I've already replaced those hinges twice!" Chris yelled from the kitchen.
    "Don't know my own strength. And don't yell. It makes the worst echo and I'm just down the hall." The female assassin said, ghosting back into the room.
    Austin glanced at her defiantly. "I'm not hurt."
    'Here we go.' The senior assassin thought.
    She calmly laid the kit on the card table and looked her long time friend in the eye. "We've been over this, haven't we?" Her tone was gentle; she wasn't trying to argue, just stating her case.
    Austin nodded, the defiance leaking out of his eyes.
    "Didn't you feel better the next day when you got "doctored" on?" She asked, putting air quotes around the word "doctored".
    Austin nodded and turned so his right side was visible. "You win."
    Abigail pulled up a chair, carefully looked at the at the four inch long cut and winced.
    William gave a low whistle and said, "Dude, what the heck happened?"
    Devin walked into the room as Abigail unclasped the kit. "I told you it was worse than it looked."
    Abigail gave their resident scientist a cursory glance, then looked away for fear of laughing. He was wearing orange protective goggles and a blue suit styled like a janitor's uniform, his name even stitched in black letters. But, the suit had a hidden feature: It, with the proper trigger word, would form a shield that you could drop one million nuclear bombs on, but it would not break. Which he constantly bragged about.
    "William, can you come here. I need to borrow your cat eyes."
    William walked over as Chris asked, "What's wrong? He just needs a bandage..... Right?"
    Abigail sighed, "I wish. He has glass in his cheek. What'd you do this time, big guy?"
    Austin said, "I threw a zombie though an empty store's window. I guess of the glass hit me." He then shrugged like it was nothing.
    Abigail sighed, "More stuff to worry about? Ugh."
    Chris looked at Devin, "Take us into the air."
    "No," Abigail said. "Not while I'm fixing Hulk here up. If Devin has to make the ship roll, we're all going to go flying and I'm probably going to have some sort of tool in hand and somebody's going to get hurt."
    William's ears twitched in amusement and he heard something.
    Chris nodded toward the door, pulling a gun out of his belt. "No, no. Whatever it is, it's far away. But, there's a lot of noise coming from it.... It's making me nervous."
    "We can tell. Your tail is twitching like crazy." Devin said.
    No one laughed, they were watching Abigail. She'd grabbed a pair of tweezers and was pulling out glass shards, William pointing out the one's she couldn't see.
    "That's it." Abigail breathed out, "Did I hurt you, Austin?" She asked while re-sterilizing the tweezers and putting then back in the box, trusting William's call.
    "Nope... Now what?" Abigail smiled, pulling out two cotton swabs, a bottle of disinfectant, and one bandage. "Crap." "Next time, think before you act and avoid this process altogether," was the joking reply.
    They got injured, no matter how hard they tried to stay safe. "All right, all right. Fix me up, Doc."
    He got a quick glare, then, the female assassin got to work. "Done.", she said, pulling away one minute later.
    The bandage was almost invisible against Austin's skin.
    "There. No one can tell." Devin said.
    "You should be proud, Devin. The bandage did exactly what is was supposed to do: Blend into the wearers skin and give the illusion that they were never hurt... Well done." Abigail said, giving him a short round of applause.
    Devin bowed nonetheless, "Thank you, thank you. I'm quite proud of my invention. Now, I think I'll have my meal in the science lab. " He turned around and grabbed a previously unnoticed bag.
    "Excuse me." He said, easily gliding out of room, across the hall to his room/science lab, that was armed with everything but toothpicks.
    As he walked by, Abigail got a good look at the bag and walked over to the counter. "Yum! McDonald's! Oh, William, I think this is for you."
    She held up a perfectly cooked fish and one large bag with a yellow M on it. "I had a lucky find in town. I also got some more fish."
    'There should be enough fruit to hid the smell...' Abigail thought as she laid the food on the table and then... Clank, clank.
    "Honestly, who knocks on a metal door?!" Austin exclaimed, voice almost a yell of exasperation while Chris dug through the bag.
    "Keep it down. I'm opening the door. William, guard the kitchen. Austin, guard William. Chris.... guard the food, I guess. Devin gets to guard himself."
    Abigail walked out of the kitchen, checking that her knife was in her belt and that everyone was in their places. She took a deep breath and opened the hatch a little.
    "Stand back!" she said, her voice full of command. She threw the door open, the sight that met her eyes got her on guard.
    "We're from the White House. We're the special government group, the Mazuko. We have a new mission for you and your group" Their voices were snakelike and promised death.
    "Alright. Let's have it.... Mazuko-sama." She said slyly, alerting them that she knew some Japanese.
    They handed her an envelope that she carefully weighed in her hand. 'Not heavy enough to be a bomb, but too heavy to be just one or two pieces of paper.'
    "Thanks. We'll get to it as soon as we can... Is there some way to alert you that the job is done? Or will you just know?" She asked, sounding professional, yet kind.
    'The client comes first. The job second. I have to deal with these three "people" first'. The "Mazuko" were dressed in all black cloaks, hoods up. Abigail had a feeling she didn't want to see what was under the hood.
    "We'll know. Goodbye, Abigail." Then, they vanished.
    "How did they know my name... Ah well." She said, yanking the hatch closed.
    "Who was it? The mailman?" Chris asked, digging into some sort of burger.
    "Yes, Chris. It was the UPS guys delivering our new TV." Austin said.
    "New mission." Abigail said, throwing the envelope on the table.
    Austin glanced at it calmly and William picked it up. "There's something on the front."
    Sure enough, in purple ink, there was every one's name and the word "Mazuko". "Mazuko... What is that?" Chris asked through a mouthful of food.
    "It's Japanese." Abigail said interrupting William who was scolding Chris for talking with his mouth full.
    "Well..?" William said, asking for elaboration.
    "It means..." Her face was full of confusion and concern. She put her head in her hands and worked to school her expression.
    "Er..." William said, wondering, like the rest, what had upset the girl.
    Abigail sat up suddenly, "Mazuko. It means monster." Everyone looked at each other, wondering what they'd gotten themselves into this time.

  5. #5
    Registered User Wes Corona's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2015
    Location
    50 miles from a place that time forgot
    Posts
    80
    Once a thought is complete, it should become a paragraph. Paragraphs have spaces between. It looks more orderly. It provides a much easier format to read.
    Perhaps it was just an idle view, or the view as seen by an idle mind.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •