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Thread: For The Vine by Coolbroman

  1. #1
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    Sep 2015
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    For The Vine by Coolbroman

    once there was a boy named squiggletons and he was MURDERED by his bro squattingtons

    he was all like “wow bro im now a goste y u do dis” and his brother was like “wow spooky goste i have just the right thing” as he whipped out his gun

    he shot the goste
    nothing happened

    spooky

    the goste mr squiggletons said “wow that was rude why i am your brother” then his bro squattingtons said

    “for the vine”

  2. #2
    Registered User UlyssesE's Avatar
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    Jul 2015
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    Sorry, just not enough characterization, dialogue, and exposition for me to follow along. Perhaps a couple of re-writes, then you could submit another draft for consideration.

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